Oh, my God, this is exciting!
“It’s hotter than a monkey’s bum in here, Your Majesty,” he said, and the Queen smiled quietly to herself.
Yeah. Well, what Jesus blatantly fails to appreciate is that it’s the meek who are the problem.
Oh, what a giveaway!
If… she… weighs the same as a duck, she’s made of wood…?
And therefore?..
She’s a witch!
I got better.
No, you didn’t!
Don’t give me that, you snotty-faced heap of parrot droppings!
Your kind makes me puke!
Then did we bust the Harry Tony mob, who did seek to import Scandinavian filth via Germany. For six years they cleaned up a packet - came the day I got whiff of them through a squealer and within one week did a mop-up right good. They’re now languishing doing five years’ bird in Parkhurst.
I’d like to answer this question, if I may, in two ways. Firstly in my normal voice and then in a kind of silly high-pitched whine.
This new learning amazes me, Sir Bedevere. Explain again how sheeps’ bladders may be employed to prevent earthquakes.
Well, why don’t you go and tell him you want to be a leper again?
Well, never mind. I’ll just take the Lord Lieutenant in Nylons, then, and these two copies of Piggie Parade. Thank you.
I’m sorry, I was a bit on edge just now.
I think the court will be able to judge that for themselves. I want to know why the regiment presented the accused with a special pair of gaiters.
Yeah! It looks great! The fat one balances the two skinny ones.
Now on with the pixie hats, and bring in the skating vicar!
(singing)
“Everything goes in
everything goes out
A fish, bananas,
old pyjamas,
mutton, beef and stout”
I made Judas the most Jewish!