Anyway, as I said, I decided to face up to the facts and stop beating about the bush or I’d never look myself in the bathroom mirror again.
A duck!
Who are you, who are so wise in the ways of science?
My liege!
Excitement, drama, action, violence, fresh fruit. Passion.
And the Lord did grin, and the people did feast upon the lambs and sloths and carp and anchovies and orangutans and breakfast cereals and fruit bats and…
Remember: policemen make wonderful friends. So write today and take advantage of our free officer. Thank you. And now for the next sketch.
Is it a Quantity Surveyor?
Come on little birdies … come on little birdies … tweet tweet … come and see what mummy’s got for you …
Is Frank in? He’d be able to deal with this one.
Ludwig, have you seen the jam spoon?
And they’re off, and Queen Victoria got a clean jump off, followed by Queen Victoria, Queen Victoria and Queen Victoria.
Are there any women here?
Look, if we built this large wooden badger…
Anyone seen the patient?
Look, you seem to be bleeding rather badly. I think you’d better hurry up and fill in that form.
Now what seems to be the problem? You can tell me - I’m a vet, you know.
- Oh, I promise to take care of this one, mum!
- That’s what you said about the tiger!
In 1945 Peace broke out. It was the end of the Joke. Joke warfare was banned at a special session of the Geneva Convention, and in 1950 the last remaining copy of the joke was laid to rest here in the Berkshire countryside, never to be told again.
I’ve run out of beans!