I’m out of beans!
One on’t cross beams gone owt askew on treddle.
The Minister of Technology met the three Russian leaders today to discuss a Ł4 million airliner deal. None of them were indigenous to Australia, carried their babies in pouches or ate any of those yummy eucalyptus leaves. Yum, yum. That’s the news for wombats, and now Attila the Bun!
By jove, he was right.
Blimey, whatever did I give the wife!
Intermission
Oh well, how’s about showing me the cutlery?
Bicycle Repair Man? But… how?
- lf l let you in you’ll sell me encyclopedias.
- I won’t, madam. I just want to come in and ransack the flat. Honestly
Well it may be the end of that, but it’s certainly far from the end of - well in fact it’s the beginning - well not quite the beginning - well certainly nearer the beginning than the end - well yes damn it, it is to all intents and purposes the beginning of this year’s Ideal Loon Exhibition, sponsored by the ‘Daily Express’.
Yes, but I think that with Government backing I could make it very silly.
You’ll never take me alive, copper.
Well, here we try to help people who have to link sketches together. We try to stop them saying ‘Have you ever wondered what it would be like if’ and instead say something like um… er… ‘And now the mountaineering sketch’.
And now, the mountaineering sketch!
I was just wondering whether it would be possible for me to join… the women’s army?
Last week the Royal Festival Hall saw the first performance of a new symphony by one of the world’s leading modern composers, Arthur “Two Sheds” Jackson.
Haagbard Etheldronga and his Viking hordes are currently appearing in ‘Grin and Pillage it’ at the Jodrell Theatre, Colwyn Bay. ‘The Dirty Hungarian Phrase Book’ is available from Her Majesty’s Stationery Office, price - a kiss on the bum.
Spammity Spam…
Once, one Sunday I told him my parents were coming round to tea and would he mind very much not nailing my head that week and he agreed and just screwed my pelvis to a cake stand.
Well, as I say, we’ve always been good friends, sharing the interests, the gardening and so on, the model aeroplanes, the sixpenny bottle for the holiday money, and indeed twice a month settling down in the evenings doing the accounts, something which, er, Deidre, Deidre that’s my wife, er, particularly looked forward to on account of her feet.