There’s this guy, y’see. He takes a trip to Europe. It’s his first vacation in a long time. He sees the sights, you know? He has a real good time. Anyway, after a while he decides to call home.
He gets his brother on the phone, and the guy says to his brother, ‘How’s everything at home?’
And his brother says, ‘Your cat died.’
And the guy says to his brother, ‘You shouldn’t tell me bad news like that! You should break it to me gently! You should say something, you know, like “The cat crawled out on the roof, chasing a squirrel, and it got stuck. We had to call the Fire Department. And when they finally got there, the firemen crawled up and grabbed the cat. But on the way down, he slipped and the cat fell to the ground. They had to take the cat to the vet. Sorry to say they had to operate on the cat. But it was too late. They couldn’t save the cat.” That’s how you should break bad news like that.’
“In Greek Mythology, Chiron was a half-horse, half-human doctor.”
“Did that make him the Centaur for Disease Control?”
Dragon:
“No no no, what kind of savage are you? You don’t eat Princesses, you put them on your hoard for awhile and then let them go after a couple of weeks so that they can mature into Queens and make new Princesses. Honestly. This is basic sustainable free-range Princess farming 101 level theory.”
As I age, I’ve become quite the aficionado of BMs (bowel movements). Examining them with some interest; they run the gamut of ‘nice shape and color’, ‘easy in and out’, ‘clean finish’ to the more troubling, ‘What on earth did I eat yesterday’ and ‘Oh my God - an organ has dissolved’. My wife doesn’t quite share my enthusiasm. Her comment: Did you spray (air freshener)
Maybe it’s a security issue? The site is so old that it’s still “http” rather than “https”. Here’s another version that’s good (but not nearly as complete) on an https server:
