Murphy’s First Law for Lonely People in New York City: Despite all of the things to do in New York, you will have nobody to do them with.
Dasgupta’s Corrolary to Murphy’s First Law for Lonely People in New York City: When you do find someone to do things with, your unlimited Metrocard will expire.
I think this is a specific case of the more general one where the desired person wants someone just like you that isn’t you.
Ach…I just ran into him upstairs…still awkward, though now sober.
wolfstu’s corollary to Morri’s Rule: When you finally come out, you will discover that all of the guys you’re attracted to, who are cute and smart and with whom you have loads in common, will be straight. Any gay guys in your social circles will be too closeted for you to find out, or not be interested in you.
Murphy’s Law for Lonely People Part Nine: The moment you tell a ‘good’ friend how lonely you used to be before you get to know that ‘good’ friend, the next thing that happens would be your ‘good’ friend complaining that you are too much of an effort to be around and dumps you for greener pasture and friends who are eaiser to keep.
Murphy’s Law for Lonely People Who Has Cell Phone: The moment you switch off the phone for some reasons, your friend will call and leave a message akin to “How about lunch/dinner/movie”. And when you finally read the voice mail and reply, they will exclaim: “Where have you been? I had lunch/dinner/watched the movie/gotten a life already!”
Law of Relationship between Lonely People and the Phone: When people call you on the phone it either your friends needing help, telemarkerters, or wrong numbers.
And nope, they are not interested in watching it again, or happened to be broke, or don’t want to waste time watching movie again…
Elmwood, I’d like to add one more to Murphy’s Laws of Internet Dating… Your profile will clearly state that you have a child, but yet people will respond to your ad and sound half decent until you discover that their profile indicates that they do not want to date someone who has children. I personally hate when they do that. I once responded back and said, “did you notice that I have a child???” ::sigh::
[q]Murphy’s Law for Single People living in Niagara County, NY: Everybody else is married, about to be married, or angrily divorced. Your married friends will “know lots of single people” who might be interested in you, but you will never actually see those people, as they don’t exist.[/q]
Yep yep. And Duke’s bit about there being a gazillion things to do in NY and no one to do them with… I lived that same feeling last summer here in Minneapolis. I went to a few Twins games by myself. That was depressing. But the things I didn’t end up doing (i.e. Valleyfair, mini-golfing) were worse.
Maybe if you people spent less time bitching and more time doing whatever people do to be not lonely, you could be like millionaires or something.
But I like bitching.
Anna Livia’s Second Law When you decide you will be platonic friends, he kisses you. When you give him an easy way out that will not hurt you quite as badly, he does not take it.
Anna Livia’s Addition to Rules One and Two If said would-be partner is world’s most neurotic Scotsman, he will decide it is you who are too neurotic to date.
AL
If you move across the country, none of your old friends will bother to keep in contact with you.
In this new state, anyone who you manage to make friends with already has a large social group. You will never meet any of these friends, or be invited out to do anything. Eventually, you will be forgotten for the larger group.
Loneliness’ Last Laugh: You only know that you are truly lonely only when it is too late.
McLauchlin’s Law of Gussying Up:
The amount of money a given person has spent making themselves look attractive is directly proportional to the disdain they will feel for you should you find them attractive.
Anya’s Caveat Of The Wardrobe
Your wardrobe will be judged, by the condtion of the clothes you wear to work. If you wear khakis and polo shirts to work, you will then be teased when you wear something marginally nicer than your standard.