I think two points are being misunderstood there:
i) She was an exemplary girlfriend, before she got raped. I was largely very happy with her up until these events (which I later became aware of) occurred. That I did not know about them up till now is a large factor in the way I felt in the previous two threads because I had no understanding of why these things had happened, it didnt make any sense.
ii) She did not give head to people in the toilets immediately after she was raped, it was a few months after when she was in the words of a friend “worse than I’ve ever seen her”. This girl can outdrink me and I can guess that was pretty wasted. The way she has explained it to me is that she felt completely out of control in who uses her body, powerless and she wanted to screw men over in the same way they had her (yes I dont understand how you can think giving them head is screwing them over either but I can broadly see the kind of thinking that might lead her to do it).
I totally understand where all of you guys are coming from in what you are saying to me (here’s the infuriating bit) but I dont care, it serves only to refinforce my conviction that I am not going to chuck her straight away today. I am giving things a chance to progress and become better if they can. That is not to say I will go on taking shit, I’ve made it very clear to her what the situation is, I have given her ultimatums on this so she is very sure about how things are. If I feel it is no longer in my best interest to see her then I wont but right now it is.
as always, thanks for listening, posting and putting up with my shit.