Why do chicken coops have two doors?
If they had four doors, they’d be chicken sedans!
(A coupe is a 2-door car)
Thank you! I’ll be here all week!
Oh, the Faire photographer is still sorting those 1100 pictures, and I’m planning to replace my packed-away-for-eternity first aid box with one of these beasties.
Why is there a car outside playing booming bassy hip-hop at 400dB?
Because they’re assholes, and students know that it angers me when they do it 24/7.
DANGIT!!
I was supposed to go see David Gray in concert tonight. About a half hour ago, a notice went out that the show has been cancelled and will be rescheduled “sometime in the future”.
:: sulks ::
Hey Rue! Really gross bug story there. Sigh I’ve missed hearing stuff like that. Here’s hopin’ ya can come back with some good puke and poop stories real soon.
Kalley BWAAAHAAAHAAAHAAAHAAAHAAAHAAA!!! I’ve missed all your jokes and stuff.
It feels a little like old times! sniff
It is 7:20 PM here and I am soooooo sleepy! I can’t go to bed though cause I’d be up at three AM if I did. I gotta wait til at least 8:30. I hate it when I get like this.
Oh well. I gotta take Joe Dawg out for his evening poop about 8:30ish so I guess that’s a reason to stay up. He is reclined upon the sofa right now. He likes that.
I forgot to ask Rue what the vet did with the bug.
Did he just squish it, or did he carefully put it into an airtight container and then scurry into his office to make a private phone call and then come out and make everybody promise not to talk about it to anyone.
Crap, it’s only 4:25 here. Another five minutes and I can leave work. I’m thinking I really don’t want to cook, but, I’m sick of fast food, and, I’m not really all that hungry. Unfortunately, the family will be hungry, so I need to come up with something.
Taters, inquiring minds want to know, did you have something good for dinner? If I’d gotten here a little earlier, I would have suggested foot-long weenies (just don’t eat 3 at a time and you’ll be fine).
I’m thinking about going reverse trick-or-treating for Halloween. My costume is going to be really nifty (anything that involves a silver cape has to be nifty, by definition–it’s in the dictionary, go look it up), and I want to wear it as much as possible. I’m going to make Rice Krispie treats, only with Count Chocula instead of Rice Krispies, because it’s more Halloween-y, and go around and give them to all of my friends at work. Maybe I should go to the mall and hang out in my nifty costume, so everyone can see it. I think I’ll wear it all day, everywhere I go.
There’s a little bit too much TMI floating around in the MMP this week. Alien bugs and foot-long weenies–what’s next? I don’t really want to know.
taxi, I can completely sympathize with your bad-writing-boss. One of my former bosses was a terrible writer, but she was convinced that her writing was excellent, so she was very critical of other people’s writing. She was also an Editor–one of those people who has to edit something, or she’s just not happy, whether it needs to be edited or not. It doesn’t matter how good your writing is, sometimes people just want to feel like they’re better than you are, so they mangle your writing and sometimes write in things that aren’t complete sentences and don’t even make sense. That drives me nuts.
Foot-long weenies? Where did I miss those? (seems that they’d stick out a bit.)
I’m headed to bed early tonight, y’all. My back hurts, and no amount of coercion is going to get me to tell you why.
After spending six hours in Waffle House scarfin’ down pecan waffles sump’n oughta hurt! My back hurts if I move wrong. That’s called gettin’ old.
Hi Rue. Glad you’re having a good time at the vet-job.
I just wanted to stick my head in here and say Happy Friday, y’all. I’m not going to have much time today to play in the MMP (or online anywhere, in fact.) Hope you have a nice day and weekend. And it was cold and rainy when I woke up an hour ago. Brrr.
Today the Pittsburgh cats officially become ours. I hope they don’t freak out too much when my Mom leaves later this morning.
Hey, we were talking about the lighthouses for sale a couple of weeks ago. I guess the auction is over. I saw an article in the paper about it (one of them went for almost $200,000), but can’t find a link.
Do we have a volunteer for Monday yet? We need someone to step forward with a witty, incisive and thought provoking MMP. Or somebody who just wants to ramble on and on about whatever cause it’s just gonna be hijacked to heck and back anyways. Any takers?
Let’s see …
Rue–as gross as it sounded, I would have loved to see the alien insectoid overlord.
MagicEyes–silver cape=cool. You’re going to be Barbarella, aren’t you? 
Kalley–people who tell “Dubya is stupid” jokes can never go wrong, in my book.
gardentraveler–hope you feel better!
I’m preparing to struggle valiantly through the day until 3 p.m., at which time I’m getting the hell out of here and driving up to Maine for the weekend. I’d volunteer to do Monday’s MMP, but I already did one, and there’s no guarantee I’ll have anything interesting to say beyond “Hey, that was cold!”
Not me. I’m too unreliable. You never know when there’s going to be some sort of kid-related crisis.
Roooooooooooooooooooooooo! Rue! Rue! Rue! Rue! Rue! I feel like we should be chanting it, like in a stadium. Like they do in Georgia. Dawwwwwwwwwwwgs! Roof! Roof! Roof! Roof! Like that.
This reminds me of a story that happened to be a number of years ago. I had a guinea pig, named Piggy Sue, which would have been real cute, had he not been a MALE guinea pig. But, we didn’t know that when he was a wee little piglet. But lemee tell ya, it became REALLY apparent when he reached his, ah, piggly maturity. At any rate, Piggy Sue ate guinea pig food, which are the obligatory pellet-type things all little home rodents eat. Aha. Home rodents. We had just moved into a new apartment, ground floor, no basement. Most of the stuff was dumped on the floor, including the bag of Piggy Sue pellets. They were on the floor near the kitchen sink, and kitchen sinks, as you know, are prime places for the ingress and egress of MICE. At about 3 in the morning I hear CRUNCH CRUNCH CRUNCH CRUNCH. I couldn’t imagine what it was. Then in the morning, I find out: There is a hole in the bottom of the bag, a substantial portion of Piggy food missing and one DEAD bloated mouse. He had eaten himself to death.
Who was the piggy in that situation? :wally
Yup. That’s pretty much what’s happening here. Except the Bad Writer and the Editor are two different people. Company President is Bad Writer and Company VP is Editor. And Editor thinks that Other Company VP also needs to edit. Which is fine… except that Other Company VP is a really really bad procrastinator. I’ve tried to impress upon her that I need this edited by TODAY, but so far I haven’t heard anything from her. You know, if I could have just done this whole frickin’ thing myself, it’d be done, out the door, to the printer, to the press and everyone would be happy. But NOOOOOOO… everybody’s got to have their hand in the pot. (Actually, I think if we all had some pot, it’d be an improvement, but that’s neither here nor there.) Oh well. This is why it’s called work, right?
Anyway, on the good news side of things, **KeithT **is coming tonight! Yay! We’re going to have a nice, quiet weekend here. Then he goes home early Monday morning, then drives to MN for an interview Tuesday, then flies back here Wednesday for an interview here on Thursday and flies back home early Friday morning. Keep your fingers and toes crossed for his interviews!
Happy Friday and I’m home alone!
Have a boatload of errands to run today. Need to finish vampire cape.
13 y/o son told me what he wants to be: Gregorio, the Dancing Fairy. His friends all want him to wear a tutu, but he (in his devious way) has decided to get some fabric paint and an old shirt and paint a tutu onto that.
I promised him a wand–so have to go get that.
He should be quite a sight. He is 5’10" (if he hasn’t grown since), about 150–he wears a man’s size 14 shoe-and glasses.
I think a tiara and wand and “tutu” will do him must fine… 
I would offer to do MMP–but I am so new here and don’t know the drill. Doubt anything I write woud be pithy enough or funny enough for such a discriminating audience.
The vet story is :eek:
I think I would have been outta there right after the projectile arthropod made its presence known. (does anyone else see RueDeDay as a modern James Herriot? The episode with the huge dog that growls and eats everything? Even Siegfried basically cuts and runs–dog is never treated because he’s too intimidated).
We go tomorrow to the post office to get passports for the boys. Both parents have to go and swear that neither is taking the child out of the country for hidden agenda purposes etc. (we found that out when I went to get our daughter’s passport).
Been there, done that, hated it. It works better if you can give them a firm deadline for edits, and if you don’t get anything by then, you assume they don’t have any edits. But I guess you can’t do that, because that would make it too easy. We used to pass around one copy for edits, and someone would invariably lose it, so that might not have been the best system. Have fun with KeithT!
Ellen, I love the name Piggy Sue! I wish I’d thought of that when I had a guinea pig. But now I’m severely allergic to piggies, so I can’t have one. 
Drae, good guess, but I’m not Barbarella–I’m going to be an Alien Space Kitty.
Before I was born, my brother had a pet guinea pig. One weekend, my family went away, leaving little Piggy with a whole head of lettuce to see him through until they got back. When they returned, little Piggy had eaten himself to death.
Shortly after I was born, my brother accidentally knelt on his second pet guinea pig and broke its back.
A little while after that, my parents accidentally shut a kitten in a sofabed for a couple days–Kitty was fine.
Then there were no pets for a few years. 
But eleanor, nobody here can match the loftiness of our fearless leader, rue, so the main thing is just to start the ball rollin. We’ll all fall in line or not. Sides, as I found out the hard way, once you even suggest you might, you got the job. Everybody with me on this? Next week’s MMP by eleanor?
My kids had the most adorable little fluffy hamster who was a real sweetie pie. Of course it met an untimely death. I hate that!
We are doing reverse trick-or-treating here at my office today. My department is going to go around handing out jello shots to the other departments. 
Then we’ll all get together for a big Halloween party at around 3:00. There will be prizes for costumes and various “spirited” consumables. I will probably sneak out early.
Tupug
Ok, all in favor of elanorigby posting next week’s MMP say “Aye!”
AYE!
All those opposed say “Nay!”
:: crickets ::
The ayes have it. Elanor shall be our MMP OPer next week. Congratulations!