My name is ThelmaLou and I am an addict...

Mundane Pointless Stuff I Must Share (MPSIMS)
#1

…of the SDMB.

<random voices around the room: “Hi, ThelmaLou.”>

If I’m near my computer or kindle, I’m powerless to resist checking in. I do it all day. I do it first thing in the morning. If I wake up during the night, I check in on my kindle. While I’m sitting up in bed.

Fortunately I’m not yet at the End Stage where I feel compelled to post on every dadgummed subject on which I have an opinion (and I have an opinion on everything). In fact, I often write out long replies and then delete without posting. Is that a hopeful sign?

The constant mental stimulation, flow of ideas on every subject under the sun, humor, wit, wisdom, trivia, stupidity, and utter humanity that constitute the Dope are like catnip to me. I have three cats, so I know what I’m talking about. I’ve seen it happen to them. It’s only a matter of time until I fall into a writhing stupor, rubbing my face in the intoxicating green stuff, biting, licking, eating it, until I pass out in a puddle of my own herb-laced drool.

<Snaps to-- looks up-- blinks>

Maybe I need A Life. I retired about a month ago. Don’t have to sneak peeks at the Dope while at work any more. I can keep an open container (as it were) on my desk all day, if I feel like it.

The other day my internet was out for about five hours. I read a book. It felt good. Then I started to get the (mental) shakes. I managed not to check out the SDMB on my phone… but just barely. I contemplated going to Starbucks or McDonalds for the wifi, but didn’t. Just barely.

They say admitting you’re powerless is the first step.

#2

::looks at thread count:: I feel your pain.

#3

I’m not an addict. I only come to these meetings because the judge made me.

#4

It keeps you off the streets,** Thel**. God knows what kind of trouble you’d get y’self into without it. Besides, you earned it.

#5

Yo! You need to go log in to How often do you check in at SDMB? which I just started today at 10:13 AM to see who all else may be in your boat or short bus! :smiley:

So far 6 have owned up to the addiction.

#6

Oh baby.

<ThelmaLou stares at Chefguy’s thread count, dazzled>

#7

Who is the current leader in the thread count race? I know that several heavy hitters have left us for one reason or another. There used to be a neat tally somebody did of all of us, but it was more like a snapshot and I haven’t seen anybody trying an update of it.

#8

Years ago, when my boys were little, there was a movie called “Short Circuit” about a robot who becomes like a human. There is one scene where the robot is tearing through the bookshelves in a room chock full of books. He has scanned them all, but can’t stand it until he gets more. “Input,”, he shouts, “I need input!”

It was immediately obvious to my family that I was the human version of that robot, always grabbing a book to find out about something, and “she needs input!” was my family’s way of acknowledging my info addiction. When the internet came along with its ability to instantly gratify my ‘input’ needs, I did everything but tether one to my wrist. It’s a rare day that I don’t go diving for my smart phone a half dozen times a day, Googling something I’ve just read, heard, or thought about. Still very much in hog heaven. :slight_smile:

I don’t check for emails or texts - I don’t get very many of either at home and I’m not bonded to any of the social media. But that constant instant availability of information is seriously addictive.

#9

Should we be enabling your stat addiction? :stuck_out_tongue:

#10

Marley23 is at 78,223. Last posted 10-20-2014
He’s taking a break.

#11

I think Colibri is up there in the ionosphere, as well.

Oops, nope, he’s about where I am.

#12

I can stop anytime I want!

#13

Only if you love me! :smiley:

Well, that’s a start. I have been trying to remember the name of the Doper who had some clever programming and a huge file of statistics of that type. I can’t even remember the basic question he/she was trying to answer. Meanwhile his/her screen name has changed (at least once) and I can’t remember that either!

#14

Perhaps, but you shall want anytime you stop.

#15

I’ve read that excessive screen time can weaken your memory, but I’m sure there’s nothing to that. Anyway, I can’t remember where I read it. :stuck_out_tongue:

#16

also, it makes hair grow on the palms of your hands. :slight_smile:

#17

I located that thread in case anybody has the necessary software to read and manipulate the file to find who had the most posts back then:

=============================================


Another look at “active users” at SDMB
11-26-2011, 01:01 AM
Zeldar

#121 12-28-2011, 05:56 PM
ZenBeam

=============================================

The Doper whose names I had trouble remembering was ntucker now spinky

=============================================

I don’t really recommend wading through all of it – I certainly don’t intend to myself – but I hated leaving this little jaunt into history unfinished.

Besides the Top Dog in Post Counts is probably not the same one who had that distinction back then (4 1/2 years ago). :slight_smile:

#18

At first, I just lurked all day at work. I have a very boring job. It gave me something to do.

Then I finally registered and started spewing my own brand of dopery. Still only at work tho.

Then I signed up for a few mafia games, and I began checking the dope in my off hours. But just for game info.

Then I started reading the dope while out at bars instead of socializing with friends (not that they are worth talking to).

Then…just the other night sob I Actually STARTED A THREAD while at the bar…breaks down into uncontrollable sobbing What has my life become!?!?!? Where is rock bottom?

#19

When you stop digging. I notice you still have a shovel…

#20

I would consider myself a “light social user” but have noticed I spent a lot more time this year on here and that my post count has risen dramatically. Also, Mrs. Guest often comments about my “Doping” habit.

We need a SDMB addicts support group here. Anyone think we could get the Administration to give us our own forum?:cool:

:smack: