I’m a bumbling clod, so I won’t write out any long message of support of whatever, just letting ya know I’m here and I feel for you. I used to burn my fingers… but things got better. They always do.
I know everyone else offered to talk to you too, but I’m always here as well =>
huge hugs that cure all (hey, maybe placebo’ll work =>)
LaurenBeen a cutter. Been in therapy.
It helped.
Give it a try.
Nobody will put you into psych ward for cutting. That would be ridiculous.
dodgy
Forgot to give you this link:
http://www.wingofmadness.com/cgi-bin/dcforum/dcboard.cgi
A good forum (depression, cutting, etc)
WelFriend,
I don’t cut. I punch myself in the side of the skull with the butt of my hand. Hard. Real hard. No visible scars, but still a bad idea.
Antidepressants and therapy helped me. I do it a lot less often now.
Like posting about personal topics here, talking to a therapist was intimidating at first, when she was still a stranger. It got better as I realized she had no agenda other than to help me! So I talked and talked until there was nothing more to say. She got me hooked up with an MD for the Vitamin P and his only concerns are that I’m doing okay and that there are no particular side effects. And don’t worry about side effects! The modern antidepressants have few and they are REALLY MINOR! Mine were slight depth perception problems and, ahem, [sub]amazing orgasms.[/sub] (You don’t have to tell your mom and dad about that one.)
You are SO LUCKY to have parents who are so loving and supportive. And to live in a time when you don’t HAVE to get locked up! THE MODERN MEDS ACTUALLY WORK! (That was not necessarily true when I was your age.)
Listen to WelfMom and get help. You need it, it is a lot easier than it looks right now, and it works.
dropdad
I’m so sorry to hear that you’re going through this, welfy. The others have already given much good advice, so I won’t repeat it. But, please know that we are all here for you, and care about you, and want to see you get better and stop hurting yourself.
Also, for you others out there cutting and hurting yourselves, we’re here for you too. I know that I am. Please,* please*** get help.
{{{{{{welfy}}}}}}
{{{{{{Medea’s Child}}}}}}
{{{{{{DigitalMuse}}}}}}
{{{{{{Thea Logica}}}}}}
{{{{{{Falcon}}}}}}
{{{{{{OpalCat}}}}}}
I want to thank all of you who have posted that you either are doing it now or have done so in the past, or are hurting yourself in some way. That must have taken a lot of courage, just as it took courage for you, welfy, to tell us this. I admire you all for that.
Dude, that sounds a lot more damaging than cutting. Please stop doing that.
Welfy, our threads hardly ever cross but I still offer my support to you. And e-mail me any time you want a totally non-judgemental person to listen to you and give totally non-preachy feedback.
I pretty much have. And it still beats walking in front of a train (my old “Plan B”). But giving myself small concussions doesn’t seem to qualify me for a hug from purplebear! 
I substitute sarcasm and other verbal self-destructiveness nowadays.
Hiya.
Funny this comes up now after I posted that comment awhile back that i won’t give a link to.
I have one question for you-
I’m kidding-
I’m kidding I’m kidding I’m kidding I’m kidding…
But therapy helps if you are willing to work with it and sometimes it makes you feel like she’s got a pickaxe and is splitting open your head and opening it up for the whole world to see…
I always feel strangely transparent after a session in therapy, but it helps in the end, it really helps.
It takes a great deal of courage and it hurts at first, but I can’t recommend it enough.
As for a psychiatric ward-
That’s hard to say what effect that may have on you, but if you e-mail me I can tell you what that’s like.
I was there six years ago and I am much better now-
though that might just be because I grew up a bit.
Your parents are glad they know, I really believe this.
Forgive me for being presumptuous, but you sound like you are about 18. Is that right? You sound a lot like I did back then.
Much hugs-
I’m here, too…with all these other kajillion people.
This is a problem and i know that is very hypocritical of me cause i have done it too before when i got depressed i became outwardly violent and that could be channled try to pick up a sport or start karate or kick boxing maybe beating somebody else will make you feel a little better who knows you may find something you like to do.
((Welfy))
and DigitalMuse please try this too anybody that has this problem and would like to talk about it without posting email me i will keep it a secret no need to worry
-the reason i’m such a freak
PurePhreak (username33992@yahoo.com)
Sigh, you people. It seems that everyone I know has done this at one point in time. Last year I tried to kill myself and I now have a permanent scar on my wrist. I’ve been being good recently and yet the urge still hits me sometimes. I don’t know any ways to try to help people. Just realize what you’re doing and know you may have scars for the rest of your life.
{{{everyone in this thread}}}
:^P
Thanks, that made me laugh for once today. Turp, as of now I’m getting plenty of attention…at least on this board. As for the real world, I’m just floating around. Some of my friends act concerned but they have their own demons to deal with. If anyone were to ask me that question I’d probably just laugh and remember you. No offense taken. :^)
I’ve read all the posts. Thanks, you guys. Your words have really touched my heart.
That’s my big problem: I don’t feel like I want help. I like cutting. It’s true, it’s an addiction. Heck, today my art teacher was stupid enough to give me an unbent paper clip (wire) today in class for something. I laughed evilly and kept it in my pocket until 4th period. I sat there in writing class and sliced at my arms under the table, but it was such a weak wire it didn’t do anything. Then at lunch I was cleaning out my pockets in the lunch line and the wire showed up. My best friend Paul (a former cutter) spied it and said, “NO! BAD WELF!” and pried it off me and threw it into the garbage, but I let him since it was a sucky wire anyway (my weapon of choice).
My parents still haven’t talked about my cutting with me since that fateful day. I don’t know if they will or not. Turp, I’d be interested to hear about your stay in the hospital; you know my addy. As for you other cutters, I wish you luck in whatever you decide to do. hugs to all
I’d write more but Dad wants me to get dinner out of the oven.
Thought I’d post some resources, for those who are kinda new to the subject:
1-800-DONT-CUT – SAFE (Self-Abuse Finally Ends) Alternatives Information Line
Secret Shame – self-injury information and support
Supposedly this is SAFE’s website, but, for some reason, it isn’t working for me at the moment.
Anyway, li’l Welf, we all love you bunches and worry about you; I really really hope you know that cutting isn’t healthy and take some positive steps. Big hugs.
I’ve been on medication for the last 6 years. It keeps me sane. Every now and then I miss it, run out, forget to take it, whatever… and then what happens isn’t pretty… but overall I’d say that being on medication has saved my life many times over.
I just want to say I had heard of this problem, but I never realized so many people had it. Good luck to you all.
I learned something today.
Sometimes this board isn’t so mundane and pointless after all.
Just want to say to all of the cutters,you are in my prayers and I hope you get help, when you feel you need and want it. Only you can make that decision.
One step is talking about it and you all have done that here on the board. Like purplebear said " that takes courage".
Welfy –
I rarely post about personal things, but I feel the need to add my .02 here, since I’m an old hand at this. I started cutting 25 years ago. Stopping was incredibly difficult, partly because it had been in my life so long. But the desire to do it does go away with time – that’s been my experience.
You do need to see someone, dear, and you do need to stop this. It’s possible that the wires won’t work for you after a while, and you’ll want to move up to razors or even more violent things. I took up burning myself; you can imagine the scars I have from that.
Therapists are everyone else; they can be jerks or they can be very helpful. It may take a time or two to find a sensible, sensitive one. But it’s worth the trouble – and you may get lucky and find someone good on the first try; I did. See someone soon, please. Don’t see it as giving up something you want to do, but as a step toward the healthy life you want to have.
As a long time veteran of this, I just wanted to offer my .02 worth of moral support, and a couple random thoughts.
I was mainly into razors and other legitimate cutting objects, plus burning, but would also resort to head-banging when necessary, and would settle for less-ideal tools (like paper clips) when desperate. I know exactly the feeling you’re describing about gleefully getting your hands on something you plan to hide and use.
My parents never specifically found out about this behavior, but I think they suspected. They took me for various treatments/therapy inspired by other manifestations of my problems, but unfortunately, none of it really helped me. After ten years+ of doing it, I just gradually started to deal with things in other ways, and have only cut seriously a few times over the past nine years or so.
I don’t mean to sound like I’m encouraging this, but cutting is not the worst thing you can do. If it’s the coping tool that keeps you from doing something even worse, like hard drugs, destructive sex, psycho freaking behavior, or real suicide, then it’s serving a purpose - I’m NOT saying it’s GOOD - I’m just saying that you should not beat yourself up or feel guilty about it, as cutters invariably do. Your mind has come up with this desperate way to cope with pain, and if it’s doing the best it can, you should give yourself a bit of “forgiveness”.
That said, you should also try to get help that is appropriate for you. The fact remains that this is destructive and harmful, and a symptom of something bigger beneath the surface that isn’t going to magically go away. Chances are very good that you will escalate to more severe/destructive forms of self-injury over time - like any drug (and yes, it is definitely an addiction), you develop a tolerance and start thinking of creative new options all the time. Therapy didn’t work out for me, but that’s probably a combination of poor resources (very small town) and the fact that I didn’t want to stop, or deal with my pains. But as many others have already said, the combination of traditional therapy and drugs (when appropriate) can really help turn things around for most people. If you can sort this out and put the brakes on it this year instead of ten years from now, you’ll save yourself a lot of misery - and a lot of explanations of scars that will last the rest of your life. (Believe me, ten years from now you’ll be glad if your loving boyfriend can caress your bare back and not end up instinctively running his fingers along big ugly scar lines.) So yeah, do something - take a deep breath, gather your courage (yes, it really is scary to think about stopping something that comforts you so much, no matter how crazy some people might think is it) and be willing to accept help from someone. The sooner you start to deal with it, the sooner you start getting better.
I really sympathize with your fear of discovery and dismay at your parents finding out. My greatest fear was never hurting myself, but having other people (ESPECIALLY parents) find out about it. Oh, and how many times I got myself in trouble over the years with my private writing being read by an unintended parental audience! My own saintly parents were already bewildered by their youngest and most diffucult child, and confirming such “bizarre” behavior probably would have panicked them into insisting on something drastic, like hospitalization. I also understand completely the feeling of being weirded out by how they act toward you now that they know - that strange treatment/concern, as if you have a disease that is terrible and serious, yet bizarre and possibly contagious, like a rare jungle virus. It’s good that your parents haven’t freaked out - they’re often stronger than we think, and more able to deal with things than we give them credit for.
No one can fix this for you, but others do understand and support you.
[[ comforting mug of hot tea and a quiet corner of respite for Welfy ]]
[[ warm handshakes to everyone else ]]
Since my day had something to do with the subject of this thread, I’m not going to bother starting a whole new one. Today at someone in my group of friends told the guidance counselor that two of my friends and I had been cutting. So they called us all in and we all had little breakdowns. One of my friend’s parents found out, and one managed to convince them not to tell. I, in actuality haven’t been cutting, but I was guilty by association (and by the fact that I carry a small razor blade with me in school). They didn’t tell my parents, because I would have denied everything since I really have been being good. A lot of my friends took this whole thing really hard and we spent the whole end of the day just sitting around and crying.
Yes this was quite an interesting day as one of the people being there not accused or thought to have been cutting by the person that let “them” know i spent my afternoon doing my usual bit looking normal on the outside but torn on the inside this was something that certainly happened with horrible timing but thats always the way i understand this persons reason but it was being helped i had stopped and then today as i was walking my dog i came along this broken bottle and was so tempted but thought about my friends and what happened today which both made me want to do it and not do it finnaly i didn’t even pick it up i just hurried along to get it away from me and out of mind and now that i spent time semi-cheering myself up laughing at all the dum things peole did on the tmi thread i’m glad i didn’t and am proud to say that i am going to try to stop all together if necessary i will seek help
-a very tired and confused freak
PurePhreak
p.s. thanx for listening to me ramble and i if i begin to do it again consider inquiring as to what’s going on thank you again all hope you had a better day or past couple of months than i have