Madame Pepperwinkle’s family’s from Kentucky, Sheba. Y’ever get over to Bowling Green?
I look forward to the day your UncleDaddy joins the board to tell us that you done passed on to the other world where your chair ain’t needed and you got angels wings to fly-uh, Miss Sheba Shayne. He’ll be a’cryin and gnashing his tooth and telling us all what a dee-light you were to your kin and strangers alike with your plucky heart and wheelie poppin’ motorchair.
Now don’t think I’m a’haytin on you or nothin. I am just gonna rejoice that you’ll be free of your burdens of this here life and the limitations your skydiving accident done brought on your head, back, and neck.
I’m glad that it only took you 13 years to bring this up on the board. Lawd mercy that we’ve been denied your truth for as long as we have, but at least you don’t have to pretend to be no republicorn no more. Praise be!
[QUOT**E=Onomatopoeia;16481724]In the wake of Jaymac’s banning earlier today, I know what the OP is going for, but the attempt is a little over the top, and rather than being funny, I find the black dialect caricature somewhat offensive, but hey, be my guest and carry on.
[/QUOTE]
I feel ya. I was all for funnin’ on the paraplegic, but Southern black woman parodies are distasteful :smack:
I wish the mods hadn’t been quite so efficient with banning jaymac. I’ve sweet visions of him hanging around as the Dope’s resident troll mentor and guide. Some days, I just don’t want to be a 45-year-old mildly obese woman with bad teeth and a dead-end government job. I’m ready, nay, EAGER to learn how this internetwebby thingamagig works so I can invest loads of my time convincing anonymous strangers that I’m really a short, fat, balding Jewish man. Or maybe I can arm myself with internet cred and pose as Web MD’s version of House. I’m simply lacking the basic trolling equipment that would allow me to engage in flame wars about … y’know, diagnosing and treating stuff, without being immediately discovered and dismissed as a fraud. The world could be my oyster.
EDIT BEFORE EDIT: Ok, moderately obese. Might as well own it, before someone posts my social security number and most recent passport photo.
On the ends of her armlers. Don’t matter, tho, they worth nuthin, being a cripple and all.
Ban for the Ban God!
When we were kids, my brother had a black hamster named Sheba. I’m convinced.
No estimation needed, it has been determined to be 37%.
So it seems. Hence the square wheels.
You gave yourself away in your third sentence troll. A real southern person would have said, “I a-feared I would be”.
Finally, one of these threads that is believable. Sheba you are truly an inspiration to us all!
I had a cousin named Steve Majors from Kentucky. He had to have $6 million worth of surgery when a 400 pound black woman who was stalking him fell out of an airplane onto him. He sued and got a judgment against her, but all he ever collected was a small garnishment when she got a job as Jasmine Guy’s dialect coach on A Different World.
She is in Kentucky not Canada
Sheba Shayne stay strong
Capt
I thank you all for ya’all’s good wishes, and for those jive-talkin’ honkeys who are unhip to my cool TRUE story, you all are mofo-mammajammas.
Also, it’s spelled Kentuckie by those of us who live near Booneville. Only Yankees spell it with a “y” (“Y” is for “Yankee”, of course)
We don’t have square wheels ALL the time, you know. Just 10 months of the year.
Booneville? I thought yo was talkin’ 'bout Boogerville and I was gonna say we should get a cuppa coffee, sugar. 
Gives coon skin cap a whole new meaning.
Capt