My son who is nineteen got his face pierced today. He came home with a sliver ball under his lower lip.
I mean I know kids have a hard time freaking out their old hippy parents today. We just don’t shock as easily as my own bunny hopping parents did.
But this is just silly. What the hell is he gonna do with that thing ? I see no use for it at all. If it were on this tongue he could at least claim it was to give his girlfriends a little something extra ! I would pass out if he said that to me, but that is beside the point here.
The point is I have always tried to keep him from having metal poked into his face. I was able to keep that from happening for nineteen years. Then he goes and has it done on purpose !
He is too big to spank, he would just laugh at me if I tried it, and I can’t ground him, he has to work.
What the heck do you do with them when they are old enough to do what they want, but still live at home ? Maybe I’ll sneak in his room tonight and and paint his face blue, and tell him it’s a rare form of creeping crud that comes from piercings. Nah, he won’t buy it.
Oh for the days when he believed everthing I told him.
I am also nineteen years old. You cannot stop us. We are the future. We will rule all. When we come to power, everyone will be required to have metal in their face, navel, and genitals.
Well, okay, I’m kidding. I have no piercings, don’t plan on getting any piercings, and find the concept of piercings to be really annoying.
I am his Mom, that’s what skin off my nose it is. This is my baby ( don’t tell him I said that) I’m talking about. Just because he is grown doesn’t change that. It never will.
I’m not mad at him or anything, just kind of shocked that he did it.
At least I have the Mother’s curse to fall back on ! The one that goes I hope you have four kids that are all just like you. Actually he has always been a good kid, so that doesn’t do me much good.
Well, I really don’t see why you’re making such a fuss. Isn’t it his lip? Isn’t it legal? Isn’t it his aesthetic judgment? I mean, it’s a piece of metal for heaven’s sakes.
When I got my ears pierced, it was about a year after my father explicitly forbade me to do so. We were in the car. He looked at my ear, said “Oh, you goof,” and kept on driving.
I haven’t raised a fuss, but I don’t have to like it. Hell, when he came home and I saw it I told him I thought it was silly and left him alone about it.
Dennis Leary does a great scene about this on his Lock and Load album…
The reason why you shouldnt get a steel ball shot out of your face as it would give one more thing for your dad to grab out of when he was pissed at ya.
Be sure to take loads of pictures, and then embarass him infront of future girlfriends and his future children.
My sister had one of those for a little while. I believe it’s called a libret. Personally I can’t see the appeal, but in a way, I guess I can a little. If it’s any consolation, I’ve seen worse. I saw some guy the other day with two silver balls on the back of his neck. I don’t even want to know how they are attached.
I used to have my ear pierced. I still would, had I not gone and joined ROTC when I went off to college. I have to admit that I never saw the point of that either. Pure æsthetics, which are very much influenced by popular culture. I shudder to think what sorts of things the next generation will think of to rebel against one that practiced genital piercing.
When I was a kid I got my ear pierced to freak my dad out. It worked great. When that wore off, I got the other ear pierced as well. Hell, I think half the stuff I did in my youth was designed to infuriate my dad. Playing guitar, long hair, making explosives, on and on. Flash forward 20 years, and I’ve got a couple of young boys filled with my genes. They’re very young, and I am terrified of all the upcoming incidents I’ll face like you’re facing now, Ayesha.
If you’ve done a good job these past 19 years (I’m sure you have), I’m betting it’ll all work out.
I might note that there’s a difference between doing things in order to piss off your parents and doing things that happen to piss off your parents. I did a lot of the second… never bothered with the first.
Intentionally doing what someone doesn’t want you to do is as much letting them control you as doing what they do want you to do.
My mom was shocked when I showed up with a few earrings the first time. then I added a few more…then another one…then came the tattoos.
Mind you, I did this all after I was 18, they don’t look terribly gaudy or nasty, I’m not spreading the pierces, or piercing anything but my ears(well, maybe my nipples…), and the tattoos are concealed.
You can’t stop him from doing it. Your best bet is to pray for an infection. Then he will most likely take it out.
Other than that, just let him know that you love him anyways, and be supportive.
Okay, yeah, the kid paid someone to stick a sharp piece of metal thru his face. Probably not the brightest thing he could do, but :::snort::: kids…
I think the more important thing is, is he a good kid? Is he in trouble with the law? Does he have a drug problem? Does he do well in school? Have you done everything you can to make sure he will succeed in life (if he puts his mind to it)?
If the answers to the previous questions are Yes, No, No, Yes and Yes (and even tho I don’t know you personally, based on your posts I’ve read I’m pretty sure those are accurate answers), don’t sweat it. It’s a phase. He’ll grow out of it. He just wants to make a statement among his peers–“Hey! I’m kool too!” Face it–we all did stupid things when we were kids (catch me in the right mood one day and I’ll tell you all about the time I snorted Sweet-N-Low just to see what it was like to snort something).
And you can look forward to the day when he comes into your house without his faceball. You’ll ask him, “What happened?” And he’ll say, “I just got tired of it.” Mama Crease will tell you all about how good that feels when I whacked off my ass-length hair last year.
Note to self: read carefully before posting. I was about to offer my best wishes to Ayesha and hopes that her son gets better.
For what it’s worth, Ayesha, I think you did the right thing. I would have reacted as you did–I hate the idea, but he IS nineteen, and, as Creasemunky says, when it gets right down to it, character is what really counts.
(And this coming from someone who hates the idea of pierced anythings. Maybe not even ears on ladies.)
Crease: Just a phase. I hate that expression! Maybe he likes it now and will like it later. It is a piercing no big deal. I have a tongue ring and a nose ring and it is not a phase! ::hmph:: Just a phase. :mad:
Ayesha: Don’t be worried or upset about it. Strike a deal with him. When I got my nose pierced (I am 22 and got this done a couple of weeks ago and I don’t live with my mom), I agreed with my mom I wouldn’t wear it around the grandparents, if she didn’t give me any sh*t about having it. Also remember there are worse things he could be doing. Be grateful it is only a piercing.
HE’s simply portraying what he wants people to see as an external image of himself. Thats all. Ayesha, from what I hae read of you, you are a brilliant Mom, even when you werent the mother, and I’m sure your son knows that.
The ball sticking out of his face is a harmless act of rebellion against you dominating crusties
laugh at him and sewcretly pray that he doesnt get a “Prince Albert”…
::shudder::
I never said it was a bad thing. I didn’t mean to imply it was. The point I was trying to get across was, sooner or later, he’ll get tired of it and take the libret (sp?) out. What matters is what the young man is like inside, not outside.
And, realistically Bluemon, can you see still having your nosering in 15 years? or 10? When I was 22, nobody, and I mean nobody, was going to touch my hair. I got 15 inches cut off last year (of my hair–get your minds out of the gutter) by my own decision. I was 32 at the time.
If you want to keep your piercings longer, more power to ya. Chances are, tho, LateAdolecentAyesha will take them out on his own. And my advice to Ayesha is (still) to not freak about it.
Ayesha, sweetie, try to take things in perspective. It could be worse. He could have tattoos. Those are permanent, this will heal if he later decides he doesn’t want it. You should have seen my parents’ reaction when I came home from AF tech school with 2 tattoos, and I now have 6. It’s ok to let him know you don’t approve: the main thing is don’t make too big a fuss over it, don’t rub his nose in the fact that you don’t like it or that you think he’s done an incredibly stupid thing. People don’t like feeling dumb and that will only alienate him from you.
