My Wallet is GONE!!!

Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share
1

I was in line, waiting to pay for my breakfast at a local restaurant, so I reached my right hand down into my shoulder strap purse to get my wallet.

I rummaged around. There was the smooth leather of my phone case, the rough vinyl of my diabetic bag. There was the slim plastic cover of my checkbook. I hardly use it, but I keep it around anyway, just in case.
There were shreds of receipts slipping through my fingers, along with hardened wads of tissue. Gross, I know, but I keep forgetting to throw them away. There’s a little bit of everything…but there’s no wallet.

I dug harder, straining the sides of the purse, but the purse felt frighteningly roomier than usual, as if something was missing.

I held the bag open with my right hand and stared into it. My wallet wasn’t there!

My stomach lurched, and that was unpleasant, because my stomach was stuffed with corned beef hash and pancakes. I fought the panic rising up my spine, thinking, “I had it! I had it when I put the tip down on the table! Maybe I left my wallet back at the table?”

I was just turning, about to rush back across the restaurant, when I noticed something out of the corner of my eye.

It was my left hand, clutching the wallet along with the check. Apparently, I hadn’t put the wallet away in my purse after putting down the tip.

Now, I’ve heard the Biblical saying, “Do not let your right hand know what your left hand is doing.” But for crying out loud, if my left hand has something that my right hand is desperately searching for, shouldn’t my left hand speak up so as to prevent a heart attack that could kill us all?

Sigh. This is only going to get worse as I get older, isn’t it.

2

I’m glad your story had a happy ending!

If it is any comfort, yesterday I was at the center where I volunteer. My music group had done a major moving job and everyone but me had left. I was sweeping up the stage and putting the last few items away so that the facility would be ready for the next group using it. Since I was alone in the building (and had gotten locked out once before with my purse and phone inside), I was VERY CAREFUL to keep my phone and my keys on my person at all times. It was a little awkward having them in my pockets, but better than losing track of them.

Satisfied that everything was properly tidied up, I locked up the building and went home.

Yeah. I left my phone on the counter and had to drive all the way back into town to retrieve it.

It’s horrifying to think this is only going to get worse. Some days I wonder how the hell I’m going to manage in the coming years.

3

On the plus side, think of all those old movies you love that will be new to you again, and again, and again…

4

I used to be what they called a production (or pasteup) artist, which involved using an xacto knife to cut out galleys of type and artwork and assemble them into print layouts. That xacto knife eventually became like a permanent part of my right hand. More than once, I found myself taking a drink of coffee and seeing the point of that knife coming up toward my eye. Yoicks!

5

My take is TMC has alien hand syndrome

6

Oh god! My hand isn’t going to burst out of my chest, is it?

Great. I guess no halter tops this summer.

7

Many years ago, I was driving around the USA, mostly camping out at night.

One night, I set up camp fairly late, staking my tent (a small backpacking type) down right next to my car. It may be useful to know that I don’t always wake up all at once; it often takes me some time to really get all the way awake.

In the morning, I crawled out of the tent, and turned towards my car to get something out of it. The car wasn’t there.

A thousand or so miles from home, I had a moment of panic, and shouted out loud, “What happened to my car!” Two other campers walking by gave me a very odd look and continued on their way, moving somewhat faster.

I then turned around and realized: My car was on the other side of the tent.

– FWIW: I was in my twenties at the time, and haven’t lost my car since.

8

We don’t drive and sometimes have too many groceries to make a bus convenient, in which case we catch a cab home. Got home one night and thought I had left my wallet in the cab, either right after paying or it somehow got left in the trunk where the groceries had been. Looked all over the condo for the wallet and even called the cab company to have the driver check his back seat and trunk.

Turned out that I had absentmindedly put it in a pocket of my hoodie.

9

Corned beef hash, though…

10

Then there’s the time when I had recently moved into my very first apartment, didn’t have much in the way of furniture yet. My bed was a mattress on the floor.

Woke up one morning and couldn’t find my eyeglasses. Lacking furniture made them pretty easy to find; they were under the mattress! Must’ve fallen asleep with 'em on and they worked their way underneath.

11

I had no trouble finding that. It was right on the plate.

12

I’m a loser. Yes, a loser. If its not attached to me by being a part of my body it stands the chance of me losing it, numerous times.
My wallet was missing for several days back when the lil’wrekker was still in school. I turned the house upside down. Cleaned out the car. Called the places I had been. No wallet. The next day or 2 I was at the grocery store and bought some items. I pressed the key fob to unlock the back hatch. As I walked toward the car I saw something on the bumper. Wth? It was my wallet. It had ridden there at least 6 days. Could not believe it.

13

We were riding the upper level of the Hop On/Hop Off sightseeing bus in Paris on a gray day and had hopped all day. As the bus turned a corner toward the setting sun, it suddenly became bright so I reached for my sunglasses on top of my head but they weren’t there. Checked my tote bag, pockets, window shelf–no sunglasses. Announced to my husband and daughter that I had left my sunglasses back at the prior stop, but we didn’t have to go back to retrieve them–I’d just get a new pair.

Husband: "Hon, you’re wearing your sunglasses. On your face. In front of your eyes."

14

I always keep my phone in my front left pocket. Several times I have been walking and my left hand hits my side and OMG my phone is not there!! A momentary rush of panic sets in before I realize I am holding my phone in my right hand. :rolleyes:

15

Don’t worry. It’s not uncommon for me to wonder where my phone is, while I’m reading it.

16

Wait till you tell whoever you’re talking to on the phone, “Crap! I can’t find my phonnnnnnnne!”

One point if they laugh at you.

Two points if they say, “Aw, that sucks! Hope ya find it!”

17

I lose my glasses much too often inside my house. I have a specific place to leave them. Sometimes they aren’t there. A house search is required. They were lost two days before I found them under some paperwork. Ugh.

I’ve walked away from the self checkout several times without getting my $20 cashbacks. The cashier has saved me twice by running after me. I know for sure that at least once I lost that money.

What makes it worse is checking my pocket for a $20 bill. Is that my cash back bill or did I already have that one? Frustrating.

I make a point to really focus and get off autopilot when I request cash back from the cc machine.

18

I had the same job and did the same thing.

19

I fucking LOVED reading everyone of these posts so far. I feel so at home here.

Never feed cats the mushy food while you’re in the middle of cooking dinner.

I was cooking a pot of chili. Cats came in and started crying for mushy food. So I fed them their damn mushy food, and after doing so I licked the spoon because my brain still thought I was holding the chili tasting spoon.

20

Not lost but stolen :eek:

We had a visit from those sketchy guys who want you to switch your electric service and “save money”. My wife invites them in to “review” our electric bill and I eventually usher them out. Then we realize that our house keys are missing! Those sketchy assholes must have stolen them, and now they’re going to break into our house, murder us, steal our “valuables” and our cheap-ass car.

I’m freaked out, thinking of ways I can secure the front door, my wife is freaked out, and wondering if we call the cops now, or if we should just get a hotel for the night and re-key the door in the morning, or if its better if we- There are the keys, they fell into the carseat.
Then there was the time when our neighbor’s teen daughters friends stole a bunch of our holiday gift cards. I knew that, during our BBQ, we shouldn’t have let a bunch of teens into the house unsuperv- Oh here they are, mixed in with the recycling.

Someday we’ll catch a real thief, but first somebody needs to steal something from us. Stupid trustworthy people.