When you marry someone you agree do certain things for the rest of your life. I have lots of little duties. Spider assassination? That’s me. Getting things down from high places? Me again. Putting them back? Also me.
However my wife will not do one of the duties that is required of her. I don’t why. And by not doing this she leaves her husband, whom she allegedly loves, open to ridicule. What won’t Mrs. Z do?
She won’t trim my ear hair.
OK, I’ve hit that point in a man’s life where the hair in my ears start to grow very long. (bastards) It is the DUTY of the wife to get the tiny scissors and trim them. I can’t do it! It’s virtually impossible. She bought me a trimmer but that does not work.
How about buying one of those “ouchless” type nose hair trimmers, that should do the trick for the inside hairs in the ears. Perhaps it’s just a lack of a good trimming implement that’s causing her to shirk her duty.
Well, was it in the initial contract? Somewhere in the fine print along with back scratching and always having a cold one ready? Or did you make the common mistake of inexperienced husbands-to-be by concentrating on the stilleto heels and lacy undergarments at will requirements? I’m not sure you have a legal standing here, however, IANNAL.
Why don’t you try a barter system. She does the ear hair, you buy the tampons, something along those lines. She just may be willing to negotiate. We women arepretty reasonable you know.
Well, Salem, if they’re at an age where ear-hair is a problem, the tampon thing isn’t likely to be an issue much longer. If he’d been buying tampons and sleeping on the wet spot for 20 years, he might have bought himself ear hair removal. but I doubt it’ll fly this late in the game.
She might be willing to trade out for her own cabana boy, though.
Mrs Z is almost 10 years younger than I and I would say I’m prematurly getting the ear hair. (I’m 38)
And Salem it’s more of a social contract not a written contract. I have bought the tampons without complaint, (well does there have to be so much variety?) and I do all of the laundry. So I dont’ think some ear hair trimming is out of the question.
Oh and Jaunita I could do that but then there would be a lack of eating and elecritcty for the next few months.
I got my SO one of those little trimmer gizmos for the nasal and ear hair. But I gladly pluck any of the nasty, 40 guage eyebrow hairs that seem to sprout up on a fairly regular basis. I’ll also take care of the back and shoulder zits. But he thinks my desire to do this for him is disgusting. Damn, that man just doesn’t appreciate me!
I would LOVE to be able to trim a guy’s earhair again!
The ex would never let me do it unless I gave him a 15 minute footrub. It was worth it to get rid of those 3 inch long hairs he didn’t seem to notice. Vain about everything else, but totally oblivious to long things sprouting from his lobes. And don’t get me started on the eyebrows!
Jeezopete, I must be more primate than some of you women. I do the zits and blackheads on my S.O.'s back, and I would NEVER let him leave the house with hair growing out of his ears!
His brother, on the other hand, has a HUGE blackhead on his temple. I do NOT understand how his wife can look at is and NOT do something about it! I have to sit on my hands every time I see him.
(I straighten collars and pick lint off of strangers too.)
Back when I worked on impact and dot matrix printers, sometimes I would get ink on my face and not know it. And NOBODY would tell me!!! I’d look in a mirror at 4:00 pm and see a smear of ink that must have been on my face since 10:00 am, and nobody I’d seen in the meantime had mentioned it to me.
That will never happen to any man I have care of!!!
Ah, you think it’s not written, but it is engraved in her brain…
I’d go with crazy cat lady’s suggestion on the cabana boy. Heck, *I’ll *trim your ear hair for a cabana boy.
well. who knows what to expect when you get married.
i am married a little less than 2 years. my husband is only 31. yesterday he had a total HIP replacement. Uncommon for someone so young. Scary, too.
i have to help him with his rehab. he is not home from the hospital yet. he is going to need a lot help just getting to the bathroom. not to go into TMI, but it can be much grosser than earhair.
i hope that when you are unable to do it yourself she will want to do it for you. my husband and i joke about what we will have to do for eachother when we get old, but the reality, is, it happend to us sooner than later. i find that helping out in that way is really an act of selfless love. even if it’s kinda yuck when you do it. I guess it does damage romantic love, but in it’s place is an even more important love.
Eilsel
(who is 38, dh is 38 been married
for 18 years and I would never ever
EVER trim his ear hair, butt hair,
navel hair nor would I pop back
zits, shoulder zits, face zits, or
penile zits…it ain’t happenin’ baby)
