I have started listening to a lot of comedy podcasts and have heard quite a few comedians say how they have quit drinking. One of my problems is thinking that everyone else drinks, so why the hell can’t I?
Longing for a drink is difficult to get past, especially late at night when you’re tired. I figure if some really smart, funny people can not drink for years (some, even decades) while working a job that requires them to be around booze everyday doing their act, then I think maybe I can do it too.
This may sound odd, but have you considered taking up another drug habit as a temporary replacement? Of course there’s all kinds of reasons you may not wish to do this, primarily the legality, but either marijuana or mild opiates will make giving up drinking a lot simpler.
I would make sure you have something else to fill the time you would normally be drinking. For example, for probably the same cost, you could go to the movie theater every night. You don’t want to just be sitting around every night thinking about not drinking. Other than that, good luck!
Heh. I was watching some Bond films this last weekend and thinking the exact same thing. He’s always reaching for that vodka, and then in the next scene duking it out blithely with bad guys. In reality he’d be getting his drunken ass kicked or crashing his Aston Martin.
levdrakon, I loved your whole post and your tough-ass, no-nonsense attitude.
For a lot of people, cannabis is an excellent way to wean your brain off the need to be in an altered state via booze. Almost anything mildly mind altering can help. If allergy pills make you sort of loopy, you could pop a couple of those too. Just be safe, and aware of what you’re doing it for. The goal is not to replace the addiction, just the buzz until your brain doesn’t panic over not having it.
Before I quit drinking, I’d have two or three cups of coffee tops, before it’d make me sick and jittery, but after I quit I could drink two gallons of coffee and go right to sleep.
Fortunately, I’m back down to three cups or so.
Kava kava herbal supplements can help too, but they’re not supposed to be good for your liver over the long-term.
I once quit a very annoying and vexing habit/addiction by reminding myself daily;
If any other thing in my life, exerted this kind of control over me, [teacher, parent, partner, boss] I would be rabidly fighting against it to my last breath. I don’t care for not having control, can you tell?
My motivation was my weight. I recently reached a point at which my body is perilously close to simply not working due to my weight. I ate like mad, did no exercise, and drank much, much more than you - average more than a liter of vodka per day.
It seems that the alcohol was not so much of a problem. It got me wasted, but didn’t have much of a hold. I quit cold-turkey, and have had no side effects. Some desire to drink, but not much.
I’m almost where you are PlainJain. Not quite that volume but I’m working on it. 4 or 5 beers or most of a bottle of wine or a big ol’ glass of booze. The amount isn’t as important as the fact that I just can’t seem to stop myself. I have been telling myself that I need to quit or cut down for a long, long time. Looking back, I can see that it just never happens.
So, I guess I’m saying that I have a drinking problem, out loud for the first time. Whew, that wasn’t so hard.
Good luck. If nothing else you’ve given me some incentive.
Good luck shiftless - and well done for recognising that things need to change. You can’t start fixing a problem until you recognise that it is one, after all!
I hear ya! I kept telling myself I could quit anytime, I just wasn’t quite ready. When I finally said it out loud the reality of it hit me.
Yes, I need to keep preoccupied but really, lately I’ve been binge drinking so I don’t spend a lot of time drinking. The real problem for me is trying to go to sleep sober. I kinda forgot how. I just lay there awake and… well, just lay there awake. I’ve tried cannabis and don’t like it at all. I have some prescribed Soma but I should save it for my back pain. I think I’ll try Advil PM and see how that works. Hopefully that and working out should do it.
As someone who feels I should have a better handle on this problem than I do, I too found this tough talk inspiring.
That’s pretty normal. One thing that helped me a little - and I’ve always been bad at falling to sleep - was to tell myself the goal is not to sleep. Don’t even worry about sleeping, because worrying about not sleeping is what’s keeping you awake. What I do, is tell myself “no, I’m not going to sleep. What I am doing is getting in my nice comfy bed and relaxing with the lights off. That’s all. Sleep not required. Relaxing in bed is all that’s required.”
You sound just like I did when I knew the jig was up. It’s a first step to just admit it. It’s freeing. Unfortunately I didn’t get it at the point your at. I went to a spin dry/ 4 day program and stayed sober 6 months but without a program I picked back up. I also thought well I’m still in good health and working so it isn’t that big of a deal. I’ll never get as bad as other people do. This is part of the disease telling you what you want to hear.
I wish I went to AA sooner because people are nice and they are just like me so I understand them. We speak the same language.
For me I had to drink every drink I needed to get sober. I had to hit my own bottom and I am still shocked I’m alive to type this. It doesn’t have to be that way for you. We are all different and when your ready you may want to check out the AA website and look up a meeting and attend one. It saved my life and I’m grateful my second rehab was AA based. I still go to one or two meetings a week and I will be sober for 9 years in October. I couldn’t do it alone and you don’t have to either. You don’t need a higher power to go to AA, just a desire to stop drinking. Good Luck
This was me just over two years ago. I did two weeks of intensive outpatient and then continued with SMART Recovery and therapy.
I started as a social drinker and it quickly progressed to drinking a bottle or two of wine a night, in a two hour span, or a fifth of vodka in the same amount of time (or both). I also was taking sleeping pills at the same time, to the point that I was drinking that much, then taking two extra strength sleeping pills. I can’t tell you how many times I woke up gasping for air. Scary.
It hadn’t impacted my job, but it had impacted my relationship and my health. My fiance (now my husband) almost left me. I remember the night it all went down very clearly. I had been hiding it for a loooong time. I’d drink when he was home, hiding vodka in the bathroom or bedroom. I’d go take a drink, then chew gum or eat ginger to hide the smell. I’d avoid sitting by him or would go to bed early to drink alone while I read (ha, how many books have I re-read now that I read during that time but couldn’t remember?!). That night he, again, asked me if I was drinking. I lied, as usual. He asked again. For some reason, I decided to tell the truth that time. I said yes. He was PISSED. I cried and asked for help. He immediately called my therapist (she was on vacation) and they organized things for me and got me help. I took a month off work.
I think part of the reason I asked for help was that I had done what I always said I’d never do - I was drunk and I drove. I drove the the liquor store for more booze. We had had a bad snow storm and the roads were icy. It was only about seven blocks, but I certainly wasn’t alone on the road. I almost rear-ended a truck at the stop light because I slid. Did I turn around? Nope. Still went to the liquor store. I made it home, thankfully, and didn’t kill anyone, but that was one of my turning points.
As for encouragement: When I quit drinking, I lost 20 lbs. within that first month. I’m really healthy and fit again. I kept up with my running and I also taught fitness classes, but I struggled. Now I am one of the most popular instructors and my run time is the best it’s ever been.
I saved my relationship. We got married last summer and are trying to conceive (that’s another story though - we’re having trouble and I always stress that my drinking or my history of eating disorders ruined me).
As part of recovery, I was told to find ways to fill up my time because I used to fill it with drinking and needed to distract myself. So, I now volunteer with Search and Rescue and put in about 30 - 40 hours a month. I also foster rescue dogs, which takes a lot of time, and I started going back to university to get my Personal Training certification. I could never do any of this if I was still drinking.
Finally, I’m HAPPY. Sure, I get down some times, but I truly love my life and everyone in it, and I could never go back to the way I used to be. My self esteem has even improved!
I used to drink a bottle of bourbon every night between about 8:30 and going to bed, sometimes more. I stopped and became a social drinker (2 beers twice a week with different groups of friends, who all drink far more than me). I did this without any outside assistance. I weaned myself off alcohol over a period of weeks, gradually cutting down to avoid the DTs. If i hadn’t been able to cut down I would have sought medical help to get medication to assist.
Having been a psych nurse and worked with substance abusers of every description, and nursed alcoholics in the DTs, I cannot condone levdrakon’s flippant attitude. Fair enough risk dying if you are living alone and not interacting with the rest of the world but a DT sufferer is a risk to other people as well.
Read this - Delirium tremens is a severe form of alcohol withdrawal that involves sudden and severe mental or neurological changes. Look at the list of behavioural changes that can happen, none of which you will be able to understand. Also keep in mind that no-one can predict who will or won’t suffer DTs.
This is exactly the kind of thing that acts as a constant reminder about being cautious accepting advice over the internet.
Very good point Don’t AsK! I have only had two seizures in my life and they were from suddenly stopping alcohol. Luckily for the first one I was inpatient when it happened. The second one was two weeks after treatment. I was outside a coffee shop with friends getting ready to drive home and I had an aura. Then then everything went black. I regained consiousness in the ambulance and was looking up at some fireman. I was like this is a nice dream! They told me I had a grand mal seizure and fell face first on the sidewalk. I needed a catscan of my orbital lobe and 7 stitches below my eyebrow.
Thank God I wasn’t driving when it happened! Also that it happened in a public place. You should always consult a doctor before coming off alcohol if your a daily drinker. I ended up on pheno barb for 2 weeks and have not had a seizure since,
I happen to know someone who actually died from suddenly stopping drinking. He was a hardcore abuser of alcohol, over an extended time. Of course, it destroyed his marriage, they were living apart, he was still drinking. When drunk he’d call her up and try to worm his way back into her life. She held the hard line, no boozing or stay the hell away from me. When he realized she wasn’t going to cave this time, he locked himself into his grubby rooms and hunkered down for the withdrawal. What came was a seizure and death. It happens.
If you really want to stop, then OK, but is 4 beers a night is really a problem? I regularly do that, which is pretty cut back from years ago. I used to hit the bar after work everyday and have numerous pints - which wasted a lot of time and money. A few beers at home while I’m doing what I’d normally do seems pretty harmless.
I guess the question is if the volume is constant, going up or going down. For me, it’s slowly decreasing so I guess that’s why I’m fine with it.