KY Jelly is indeed disgusting. They make a nice liquid lubricant, though, that’s sold on the women’s product aisle of our big 'merican grocery stores. It’s a light liquid, slightly slick, packaged like any other normal product. We used it a lot with condoms because without it there was just too much friction for her comfort.
Perhaps you should address, too, why condoms are a turn-off for her. Is it texture/feel (try different brands/types or lube) or the intrusion of the package ripping, application, etc. into the process? Eventually you’ll probably want some sort of birth control as part of your marriage (unless religiously against it - at which point, my apologies). Condoms are a reasonable control while you’re sorting options.
Personally, I got the big “V” this year - but there’s the time during the healing/verification process and before the operation that we had to be careful.
I wanted to emphasize something that has already been mentioned in this thread, the fact that the large majority of women do not orgasm from intercourse alone. Knowing that may not help you to last longer, but it might help you both to modify your expectations, like setting a goal of helping her to orgasm via other methods.
Speaking of which, and forgive me if you already do this, but it’s pretty common practice for the man to masturbate the woman to orgasm or up to the moment right before orgasm, and then he can quickly insert and finish things off. If she’s already orgasming as you begin intercourse, then I wouldn’t think either of you would feel much pressure or concern about how quickly you finish.
If the touching isn’t doing much for her, then ask her to show you what feels good (i.e., how she does it to herself). A little light stroking just isn’t going to satisfy most women. You need to really get your fingers busy and communicate with her about how it feels: is it getting too sensitive?, faster?, slower?, higher? (hint: focus most of your efforts on the clitoris).
And I’d second earlier comments about the oral sex. Most women eventually really learn to love it–she just might need to get past some inhibitions or need to be totally relaxed first or need to be warmed up a bit before you make your descent. I’d keep trying, experiment a little, and focus on keeping things fun.
For those women having trouble achieving orgasm through intercourse might I suggest you’re SO learn the Coital Alignment Technique? The women in my life have been very grateful. The site below makes it sound more complicated than it really is. The key is that the male “ride high” in the missionary position and rock rather than thrust.