Okay, here’s the situation. If you’ve been following along, you will recall that I’m actually kinda shy when it comes to asking women out. Also, I have incredibly bad radar for knowing if someone is interested or not, or just being nice, etc.
There’s a girl in my karate class - new this session. She’s very delicate - very skinny, gets hurt easily. She’s also young - just out of high school. And she seems to have a really big crush on me.
First dilemma - technically I am one of the instructors, so it puts me in a little bit of a bind because I don’t want to come off that I’m using my position, etc. Now that instructor bit is pretty thin, because all I do is take orders from the head instructor, and I have no control over grading. It is a college class, but I’m not on staff or anything - I’m just a member of the same karate school that runs the class, and show up to assist in teaching, and train a little myself. Anyway, there is the slight possibility I could be perceived as taking advantage. But I don’t think it’s justified, and should be able to make that clear to her as well.
Second dilemma - she is younger, just out of high school (18 or 19). I am about 10 yrs older. While that in itself isn’t such a big deal to me, there is the difference in maturity, self-knowledge, etc that comes with the age gap. She is very sweet. She is also very conservative and religious, and perhaps even a bit naive. This causes two problems. First, I’ve got this protective instinct kicking in, both triggering a white knight syndrome (to which I am very prone), and my associated alert to be cautious because of that tendency. Second, I’ve made no secret here that I am an atheist. While I am not ashamed of it, I haven’t made a big deal about it in the class either (or with many of the karate people), so it really hasn’t come up.
She’s sweet. She’s cute. She’s got a major case of hero worship, or a giant crush, or a little of both. This has been noticed and commented on by others, so I’m not just using my own broken radar. She also seems to be trying a little too hard. The conversations we’ve had feel a little like she’s trying to draw attention to herself any way she can. Having been guilty of that myself (trying too hard), I’m trying not to hold that against her.
The question is, should I ask her out?
Bear in mind that I’m a bit lonely at the moment. I could use some affection and attention. However, I am worried about the religious viewpoint difference. I am not out to corrupt her, to ruin her faith, or to destroy her morals, or manipulate her into anything she doesn’t want. In fact, the protectiveness thing is going off, I’m a little worried someone else might try to take advantage of her. I don’t think there is a strong chance of this really working out in the long run. I don’t know how she will react to finding out I’m an atheist, though I would hope to have some influence on her attitude. After all, I’m a nice, decent guy. It’s conceivable it could all be okay, but I know better than to think I’m going to miraculously change her.
I could use some advice, please.