I’m looking for nerdy, scientific, and other ‘obscure’ jokes. For example:
René Descartes is in a bar. Near closing time the barkeep says, ‘Mr. Descartes, would you like “one for the road”?’ René Descartes says, ‘I think not,’ and suddenly vanishes!
Or:
Two atoms are walking down the street and they run into each other. One says to the other, ‘Are you all right?’ The other atom says, ‘No, I lost an electron!’ ‘Are you sure?’ asks the first. ‘Yeah,’ says the other, ‘I’m positive!’
Or:
Little Johnny washed his face
His face we’ll see no more
For what he thought was H[sub]2[/sub]O
Was H[sub]2[/sub]SO[sub]4[/sub]!
Or:
Little Johnny washed his face
His face we’ll see no more
For what he thought was H[sub]2[/sub]O
Was HNO[sub]3[/sub]!
Anyone have jokes only a nerd/geek can appreciate?
Bonus: There was a Simpsons episode where Bart goes to a school for the gifted. There’s a math joke in there where the punchline is R(DR[sup]2[/sup]) (Ar-de-ar-ar!’). Was there an actual equation for that; and if so, what was it?
Look up the books A Random Walk Through Science, a Second Random Walk Through Science and Stress Analysis of a Strapless Evening Gown for more of this stuff than you’ll ever want to see.
Propyl People Ether!
A Ferrous Wheel!
Mercedes Benzene!
Heisenberg gets stopped by a cop.
“Excuse me sir,” the cop says as he reaches the car. “Do you know how fast you were going?”
“No, but I’m certain I was heading South” he replied
How do you know when an acorn likes math?
When it grows up it exclaims “Gee I’m a tree!”
I’m full of useless nerdy jokes. And the great thing is that only 8.7% of them are actually funny, but I’ll keep telling them anyway.
A proton walks into a bar one day and orders a beer. The bartender takes one look at him and sneers, “Get oudda’ here, we don’t serve your kind. No good sub-atomic particles wanting a beer in my join, why I oudda’…”
Dejected, the proton leaves, but gets a great idea. He heads home and puts on a fake moustache and monocle. He returns to the bar and orders a beer. The bartender looks him over cautiously and says, “Hey, you look familiar. You aren’t that wiseguy proton that was here earlier, are you?”
The proton replies, “Nonono, I’m just some regular guy wanting a beer my good man.”
The bartender looks again and says, “Are you sure?”
One of my co-workers just demanded to know what had tickled my funny bone so, so I read this joke out to them and they just stared at me and went away without saying anything.
