All of them.
The more, the merrier I say. Party on! 
And Welcome, Newbies!
I’m so new that I thought all the newbies favorites everyone has been listing are old regulars. I really like SingleDad, Green Bean, and everyone else who was listed. BTW, if I have stepped on anyone’s toes since starting to post, please chalk it up to ignorance of the rules and internet language. I have squat experience with message boards; SDMB is my first and only. I’ve done a search on internet lingo on the 'net to educate myself, and have turned up little or nothing. In addition, y’all have your own sub-dialect here, as well. I don’t suppose there’s a posting of definitions anywhere? That would take all the fun out of it.
You guys are SMART, FUNNY, and ADDICTIVE. My husband’s getting jealous.
Well, apparently I was FlatuLance’s favorite, but that goes to show you. sigh
I get one admirer, and 1.) He’s a guy. 2.) He gets banned in mere seconds.
The horror…the horror…
Newbies, eh?
That gives me an idea…
Roll up! Roll up! Come gitch yor gen-u-wine one-hunnerd percent authentic BBQ Pit Briquettes right here! Only US$10.00 per briquette! No self-respecting newbie should be seen without (at least) one! Roast your own mod!
Also hot today: make sure you don’t leave home without your “I Witnessed The LBMB Miracle” T-shirts - beautifully crafted from the purest cotton and guaranteed to leave behind a bitter aftertaste (with a few shining exceptions)*.
Also available: remember your favourite Great Debate with special commemorative plates - from the golden era of “Circus Discrimination in the '90s: Funfair Dismissal” to “Ask The Bag Fetishist: What’s It Like Being Bi-Satchel?”.
And for those long, winter nights across the SD world, you simply must have the SDMB “Flogging A Dead Horse” scarf, in one of four designs: “Gun Control Green”, “Creationism Charcoal”, “Libertarian Lilac” or “Sock Puppet Salmon”. Pass those wintry days with 6ft of delicately woven posts to stimulate your mind and irritate the bowels.
Please make all cheques possible to “mattk, c/o ‘This Joke Is Wearing Thin’, London, UK”.
- not a guarantee
Bring 'em on!! Just more fodder for the cannons of our wit!! They are the most refreshing and enjoyable while they’re still young and tender. (See Ukulele Ike’s recipe for Jazzmine’s little ducklings!)
There seems to be a life-cycle of sorts for posters to this board. People drop off all the time for various reasons (most of which boil down to getting a life!) and we need fresh flesh. Those who survive the initial hazing (we prefer the term “troll screening”) are usually among the best. Then there are the old posters who just won’t go away…
I want to be the first to admit that I am in love with MrCynical. Purely platonic, mind you, but he’s absolutely wonderful.
MagicalSilverKey is currently helping me through an incredibly boring day at work, so he gets a mention on the list just for that. He’s also pretty fun…and that golfball story still cracks me up.
Gadarene is cool–I love a good Great Debate poster.
I refuse to count SingleDad, because in a few months, he’s damn near got as many posts as I do. Ditto for Esprix, who may have already passed me. I think they’re wonderful and cool and neato-keen, but they’re not newbies at all.
I’m sure I’ll think of more.
Wow, I wasn’t expecting everyone to be so…levelheaded. I thought all you old-timers would yell at me and I would be forced to leave…but I tend to overreact.
I think it was one post in the BBQ pit that terrified me (I forget the name of the poster, and it was my first visit down there). It was basically about how us newbies are ruining the board, then I saw a lot of people agree, which upset me (not that my temper is harsh of anything, hence the “Can’t we all just get along?” 
)
Anyway, I love being able to discuss stuff here, because the threads make me THINK in capitals, especially the GD (although I have yet to post here). I love that I can share my opinion and I don’t get attacked. It’s like those late-night discussions I have with my deeper, more intelligent friends that open my mind.
So, welcome to everyone who is new, I like you all!
I didn’t post another Babar Recruits post with Flup, because of what happened last time I did. I don’t think Everyone’sMom is even a member. But Flup is a good guy, has a creative mind, and a razor sharp wit. And he really is that weird.
Oh god, the horror. Newbies, beware. Ike was gonna actually eat the ducklings. So, each of you bring the dipping sauce that best compliments you to pass out to one and all while you’re being cooking with lemon grass.
trisha
In addition to many of the others mentioned already, I have to give a special shout out to beakerxf. She fulfilled a long-time dream of mine when she posted a “Why do people hate gays” thread in GQ that actually was a GQ thread and didn’t have to go to Great Debates. So she’s pretty much a demi-goddess to me. She can get the promotion to full Goddess if she can help me straighten out my stroke. (That’s golf, you deves!)
Oh, and as long as I’m in the thread, let me offer a teensy bit of advice to those newbies who may be reading this thread. Nacho4Sara said
I’ve found that the best way to enter the SD “community” is to stay out of the Pit. Yes, there are some generalized rant threads there that look fun, but there’s really no way to jump in down there and win. Especially in the “newbie” threads. Most times, it’s just someone blowing off steam about one or more specific newbies that ticked the poster off. Don’t take it personally. Stick to the other forums for a time.
Speaking for GQ, I can’t remember a time when anyone gave a newbie a hard time if the person asked a good question or (better still) provided a good answer. Just ignore (or learn from) the spelling and grammar police, and you’ll do just fine.
It’s all in how you align your shoulders. Here let me show you…
[Beaker pretends to know how to swing a golf club]
See? Just like that. Now, you try it.
Actually, couldn’t I demonstrate how to bat instead? I could show you how to slam it out of the park in about a week.
I’ve been at this board for over a year, and I’ve got over 2000 posts, and the Pit still scares the crap out of me. Staying out of there for a while is indeed the best advice a newbie can get.
Also, try & listen when people try to correct you on your facts. If you’ve said “2+2=5,” and someone says “Hey you! 2+2=4!” just say “Oops! Sorry about that!” Of course, if you have incontrovertible evidence that 2+2 does indeed equal 5, we’re happy to hear it.
There’s a huge difference between a “newbie” and a “troll.” Most of us here have a thing about trolls. I myself try hard not to feed them, but I have been sucked in a few times. As for newbies, well, we were all newbies once.
I find it difficult to say that SingleDad is a “newbie.” I suppose, if you go by the registration date, he kinda is. But he assimilated (resistance really is futile) really, really fast. One that I’ve got my eye on is pepperlandgirl. She’s got potential. Really. And there’s a post by someone who’s name I cannot remember in Coldfire’s “May 4, 1945” thread that is probably the best first post that I’ve ever read. That person needs to post more.
That would be London_Calling
Like pluto said, London_calling. His profile shows three posts but I can’t get the search engine to cough up the others.
So, where’s that Geobabe been; I thought she was a pretty good addition.
ooh, coulnd’t agree more. That guy’s debut was awesome. I hope we’ll see more of him.
London, if you’re lurking: show yourself. We’d love to see more of your excellent writing.
Well, I think all of these newbies have proved their worthiness. It is time to bestow the song! This is our sacred motto, sung in harmony at every doper debauch and get together:
Who controls the British crown?
Who keeps the metric system down?
We do! We do.
Who leaves the Atlantis off the maps?
Who keeps the Martians under wraps?
We do! We do.
Who holds back the electric car?
Who makes Steve Guttenberg a star?
We do! We do.
Who robs cave fish of their sight?
Who rigs every Oscar night?
We do! We do.
Learn it. Know it. Live it.
kicking dirt
Nobody loves Osip.
sigh
Is ok, I reckon you all are ok anyhow.
::clears throat:: somebody gonna mention me right? 
With only 64+ posts, that Cecil Adams seems like a nice enough fella. I hope to read more of his writing…
With only 64+ posts, that Cecil Adams seems like a nice enough fella. I hope to read more of his writing…