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[UncleRojelio]

@Zeldar

(From Left Field) With no provocation and no detectable relationship to any previous comment (least of all the OP itself) poster details various foul-smelling and painful bodily growths and injuries. Fails to attach any TMI warnings and avoids spoilers. Appears to delight in causing massive wretching in others.

Laughs uncontrollably – in color and all caps.

eww …

[MacTech]

@h.sapiens

Post containing link to site only vaguely related to OP. Warning that link is to a 12 MB PDF, which may not be work-safe, launches many annoying pop-ups, and which may infect user’s computer with insidious malware.

Generic gloating that said pop-ups and malware will not affect his system as he is running on a Mac…

lament and anger over some meaningless mineutia at Apple…

[Licentious_Ectomorph]

@Zeldar

(From Left Field) With no provocation and no detectable relationship to any previous comment (least of all the OP itself) poster details various foul-smelling and painful bodily growths and injuries. Fails to attach any TMI warnings and avoids spoilers. Appears to delight in causing massive wretching in others.

Laughs uncontrollably – in color and all caps.

Warning from mod that this comes dangerously close to requesting medical advice; reminder that this is not allowed.

[Liberal]

Proof that Pepsi tastes better than Coke:

1. P -> C Law of Mud

2. C >- Ω P(C) Right of Passage

3. <->-<-> ۞ Sensible Principle

4. ~C~P~♥~♣ Identity Entity

5. ●●●●●C​:heart: Krelboyne Postulate

6. ~C Fickle Finger of Fate

7. P Cuey Dee

[Askia]

Disingenuous request of Liberal to share what he’s smoking.

[The_Surb]

::Pulls up a dog because I don’t have a chair in this fight::

I just stopped by to say…

[silenus]

Bathetic plea for ruminations about the immature offspring.

[Licentious_Ectomorph]

Lament that no one is hitting on me.

[Hoodoo_Ulove]

No comment

[Uncommon_Sense]

Witty response to possible troll in which the term troll is not used but the intent to accuse the alleged troller of trolling is blindingly obvious even to the most obtuse persons.

[Askia]

Echo lament, with amusing self deluded aside that at 290 pounds, there’s more of this poster to love, and more to go around.

Anticipate 'Ew."

[Askia]

Echo lament, with amusing self deluded aside that at 290 pounds, there’s more of this poster to love, and more to go around.

Anticipate 'Ew."

[Zeldar]

A scatalogical and profane exposition of free-floating paranoia, indicting every institution in modern civilization. Wild-eyed ranting and keyboard-banging hysteria.

Followed by a meek appeal for acceptance by fellow Dopers.

And a few tears.

And a smiley.

[DeVena]

Obligatory naming this the “best thread evah” due to quantity of posts, not quality.

[The_Unkempt_One]

I, for one, welcome a gratuitous Simpsons quote.

[UncleRojelio]

Obligatory naming this the “best thread evah” due to quantity of posts, not quality.

Previous post quoted in it’s entirety despite it being previous post and largely irrevalent.

[UncleRojelio]

Woo Hoo, my 372nd post!

[Uncommon_Sense]

@h.sapiens

Declaration that previous poster owes current poster a new keyboard, implying that previous poster’s comment was so hilarious that it caused current poster to spew unspecified beverage onto keyboard, thus ruining it. winking smiley.

Newbie wonders how the poster was able to complete the post if his keyboard was ruined. Asks technical question regarding the electronic workings of a keyboard.
Newbie sincerely apologises for high-jack.
A whooooshing sound is heard.

[h.sapiens]

Inevitable link to Classic Straight Dope column on relevant topic, in which Cecil Adams is referred to as “The Master” or “Unca Cece”, showing poster’s familiarity with said reclusive genius.

[Max_Carnage]

@Harborwolf

post quoting post to post that post had been previously posted

Ah, it’s a post quoting post to post that post had been previously posted