This is something that I’ve heard before and I always assumed is was in the same vein as “Men don’t make passes at girls who wear glasses.” - total crap (I mean, has no one ever heard of the sexy librarian fantasy?!?!)
So anyway - the way this little canard goes is that there are two types of women:
The kind of woman men want to marry.
The kind of woman men want to fuck.
So - a girl is supposed to figure out which one she is and go with it. And I suppose there are some rather famous examples - Geisha come to mind, long term mistresses (Marilyn Monroe, for instance, although I know that she did marry, I’m thinking of the Kennedy relationship), courtesans, etc etc.
So - boys - in your opinion, is there any truth to this? Think about the women you’ve been with in your life, assuming there is more than one. Were there woman that you dated/spent time with that you enjoyed being with/having sex with, but you would never consider marrying, because she was the “wrong” type of woman?
Or is it pretty much a free for all?
Obviously, every guy isn’t the same, and people have different likes and dislikes, but I’m curious.
I’m currently married to a woman I enjoy fucking. Does that make me odd?
It certainly is true that I have encountered women I would have sex with but wouldn’t marry. But I’ve never heard of men searching for women they want to marry but don’t want to have sex with.
I don’t do marriage, but I assume the general equivalent of “two kinds, the kind you’d want to have an ongoing rel with and the kind you’d (only) want to have sex with” --?
Well, I do find myself attracted to myriads of women I don’t necessarily have any kind of profound affinity for personally. In fact, the overwhelming majority of women who strike me as salivation-worthy are total strangers. They are on the same streets, subways, and sidewalks. They are cute. Sexually attractive.
Would I actually have sex with them? I dunno, create for me with your magic wand the possibility of that happening without me having to, you know, negotiate with them in any shape way fashion or form, and I suspect I’d give it a try. There would ensue not just penis but also more anonymous sex than I’ve ever had, and after a bit I’d be able to tell you whether or not I liked that.
In real life, where such magic wands are kinda scarce, liaisons with cute female strangers require interaction with them, a lot of it complex, and most of which is emotionally unsafe unless a degree of affinity and shared understandings of things has been achieved. And frankly if I’ve got that going with someone and the mutual interest in sex is there along with it, I tend to want to hold onto that and encourage it to last as long as it will.
A wife is more than a sex partner. Ideally, she’d also be my best friend, my financial partner, my vacation buddy, my closest confidant, a potentially good mother, and my roommate. And I’d have to at least picture still being in love with her when she wears support hose and walks with a cane. But mostly she’d have to be my best friend. I’d have to be able to stand having her around for more than 20 minutes.
While all those things are nice to find in a short-term lover, they’re not as necessary to hot monkey lovin’.
Yes, there are girls I met that there is no way in hell I would want to spend the rest of my life with. Or as some people put it, the “kind of girl you do not take home to Mom”. And it is usually great sex, but no lovemaking.
There are girls that I have met, looked into their eyes and just ‘knew’ they were ‘good girls’, but I have been proven wrong.
Example: There is this one girl here at work that is super sweet and super sexy. All of the guys here are infatuated with her, but the problem is she is a little ‘different’. At first glance, you would think she is the kind of girl you would take home to Mom for Thanksgiving, but after a little extra thought you realize that after having sex with her, you would not want to even have a two minute conversation with her. That is a girl made for fucking.
Example 2: There is a another girl here at work that everyone is dying to have sex with. She is young, cute, funny, smart, and can hold a good conversation. She is so sweet that I can not picture a one-night stand with her. To me, she is marriage material.
HOWEVER, there is always an exception. When I first met my wife, I told my friends “Yeah, I’m going to fuck her”. I ended up marrying her. So in the end, yes to 1, yes to 2, and yes to the damn free for all.
Couldn’t this be said for women, too? Rodney Dangerfield said it best - “She dated Vinny for four years then married Irv; he’s a good provider”. Lots of women pull this.
