Okay, we all know you're proud of your roids.

The BBQ Pit
1

Alright, buddy, we have all heard all your stories. About how when your roids are particularly swollen and obstructive, they cause you to have, er, oddly formed bowel movements. How sometimes they’re shaped like wedges, sometimes little rectangles, and sometimes even five pointed stars, in cross section.

These discussions invariably causes the innocent bystanders to retch and reach for the nearest wastebasket in which to hurl, but now you’ve started to deposit these treats and leave them for viewing by the next visitor to the throne room.

We have all heard how your anus is natures little play-dough fun factory, and we are tired of scrubbing our brains with lysol in vain attempts to remove the image of your swollen anal protrusions. Leaving them in the crapper, little funnelcakes of shaped, extruded fecal matter, and then telling people so they could go look at them (as if anyone was really interested) is the last straw. STOP DESCRIBING YOUR BOWEL MOVEMENTS OVER LUNCH AND FLUSH THE GODDAMNED TOILET!!

That is all.

b.

2

At least Mr. Fuckwicket isn’t spraying it all over the walls anymore.

Goddamn I missed you Billy. :stuck_out_tongue:

3

Thanks. Good to be home.

b.

4

It finally went away, then I clicked on a users profile, and it showed up on the bottom of the little window! Someone stop the madness!!

:_omg:

5

Is this the same person that has the prehensile anus? (or rectum?) Talk about ISSUES, man. Can’t someone complain to a supervisor??
Zette

(PS- if there is a weird post from me above this one, ignore/delete it. I was posting to two boards simultaneously and hopefully caught it in time not to post)

6

hehe! No, this is a DIFFERENT person, I have TWO nuts like this in my office.

As for the other post, I have to say, you really had me dumbfounded for a moment. I stared and stared, trying to make that post make some sense, and I just couldn’t. It’s the funniest thing I’ve had happen to me on the boards so far.

Thanks!

B.

7

Billy,
Always glad to throw you for a loop. I was responding to a Fathom thread about this weird number counting thing that keeps showing up on my screen…lol!

Wow, two people with major ass issues? I hope it’s not catching!!

CYA, my friend!

Zette

8

My nether regions work, according to the people with whom I interact IRL, al too well. And, apparently, often. And I’m not about to come into intimate enough contact to “catch” anything from these mopes.

Thanks for a good laugh. And welcome to Insomniac Theater.

b.

9

“Do you have a prehensile rectum that you can extend on a stalk like a snail’s eye and aim?”

That’s from memory.

Billy, you’re the best poster of poo stories on the board. :slight_smile:

10

For the record … I would be willing to pay a nominal amount to actually view a turd shaped naturally like a five pointed star in cross section.

But maybe that’s just me.

11

Believe me, there’s nothing natural about it.

b.

12

The sun rises and falls. The tides rise an ebb. And Bily Rubin suffers from another co-worker’s bowels. All is as usual with the world.

13

Does your company HR advertise jobs in Weird Arsehole and Crazy Turd magazine? Do applicants have to bring a stool sample to interview?

14

Actually, having a fully functional brain is not a prerequisite of systems engineering. I think the tendency toward odd bathroom habits is just a perk-er, benefit-er, side effect of not having both oars with you in the elevator.

There are lots of people with even stranger personal habits, like the guy who never bathed or changed his clothes or brushed his tooth, but they aren’t nearly as amusing as the scat issues.

B.

15

And then there were none.