Oh hell 
I’m really sorry. I don’t want to plaster my phone number on the board, but if you have a chance to e-mail me before you go (mauvaise at gmail dot com) I’ll shoot my number - call me if you need anything. Do you know which hospital?
Johnny let me know if you need:
-A beer
-An ear to listen
-Transportation
-A couch to sleep on
-Anything else
Seriously, do not be shy. Post here and I’ll get in touch with you.
I thought about leaving last night, but I decided I’d better get some sleep before I went. 1,620 miles is a long drive without sleep. I was just getting out of the shower when the phone rang.
My sister said she’d talked to mom. They’d drained the fluid. Mom’s coherent now, but she didn’t know why she was in hosptial. She said she felt like a mushroom. My sister told her. They’re going to do a CAT scan tonight, before getting the biopsy. Sis said that I might consider waiting before coming down.
No, I’m coming. I’ll be out the door in 20 minutes.
Cisco: I’m driving down, so I’ll have transportation. I’ll stay at mom’s house. Thanks for the offer.
Mauvaise: I don’t know which hospital. They were looking for a bed last night. St. John’s was mentioned, but so were a couple of others. I’ll find out when I get there.
Thank you all for your thoughts, and especially to Mauvaise and IrreverentTone for their e-mails.
You and your family have my very best wishes.
Oh God, Johnny, that sucks. Are you ok to drive alone? I’m so sorry you are going through all of this. Please try to be careful driving. Positive thoughts and prayers for you and your Mom. If you can, let us know that you got there safely.
Johnny, I’m so sorry. I can’t imagine what you’re going through right now (well, the Pacific Northwest, at a high rate of speed, but you know what I mean).
You are all in my prayers. Can I ask what your mom’s first name is, so I can be specific?
((((( John & Family )))))
We both missed your out of work thread and I’m late finding this thread.
You have our emails and you had our phone numbers. Hope you still have our home phone. Ric’s cell # has changed since you had that. We are here for you in anyway we can help. We take friendship seriously and consider you to be one of our good friends.
Many hugs, good thoughts & prayers are heading your way and, of course, include your family.
If on your way back to Washington, should you feel the need to stop by here to reconnect with your LA area friends, you are welcome to a warm bed in our humble abode.
Hugs,
Ric & Kathy
Man Johnny that sucks big time. I have been worried about your Mom for some time and have been wracking my brain for some way I could help here in San Diego. I would be willing to drive to Phoenix to help in anyway I can. Please let me know if you need anything. Drive safe.
I am sorry to hear about this. My prayers are with you and your family at this difficult time.
Okay. Here’s what’s giong on.
I’m in Phoenix now. I left Birch Bay at 4:00 yesterday morning, and drove 27 hours. I only slept once, but the ‘shudder strip’ (or whatever it’s called) woke me up and I got back on the road without crashing. (This was on the 10, just before the ‘Phoenix 125 miles’ sign.)
As I posted, the first hospital [B-something] said mom has ‘stage 4’ (not ‘phase’) rumours in her head. They said she needed immediate surgery, and that it was probably terminal. Mom’s in [something] Lincoln hospital now. They went into her head this morning and the doctor said it’s not cancer. He said (according to the ICU nurse) it was a ‘mass’. The ICU nurse said that it was an ‘infarc’. (I asked if she meant ‘infarction’, and she said yes.) I asked what the masses were, if not tumours/ She said she thinks that the mass of cells is consistent with a stroke. She said that it’s possible the mass will be re-absorbed. The recent scans showed no cancer in mom’s body; and that brain cancers are usually not primary, but metasticised.
Now, mom had lung cancer before and they removed a lobe. In September they found a spot on her other lung. It went away. Not cancer. It looks as if maybe the first hospital jumped the gun on their diagnosis, which caused a great deal of consternation, let me tell you!
Mom has a drain in her head. She’s supposed to have the drain removed and a shunt put in on Tuesday. I really should head north on Monday, so that I can find a job. Right now, my income is zero. No unemployent benefits. (I got a call from a temp agency as I was driving down, and had to tell them I was unavailable due to a family emergency.)
My sister and I visited with mom for about an hour tonight. She’s conscious and coherent, and is even saying that she’d like some food. But what she really wants is a cigarette. She made my sister bring her some, but my sister conveniently forgot to bring a source of ignition. (And she also told the ICU nurse that mom had the cigs.)
So. The good news is that it looks like it’s not cancer after all. The hard part is going to be convincing mom to move to San Diego. (I told her tonight that she could always move to Washington. She said, ‘No way! It’s too cold and depressing up there.’)
Johnny:
I am glad that was not cancer!
I was out for a while due to college and now that the session ended, I just found about this!
I also live next to Phoenix, let me know if you guys need help!
Wow, I am really relieved to hear that she doesn’t have cancer after all. Talk about dodging a bullet. Hopefully things will get better from here on out!
Thanks for the update, Johnny. All three of you are very much in my thoughts and prayers.
(And, BTW, if you’re falling asleep at the wheel, you really should stop and sleep for a few hours. If you want to kill your own dumb ass in a horrible fiery accident, that’s one thing – but there are other people on the road. [/lecture])
I had to head home on Monday morning, since I currently have no income and I have to look for a job. Mom was alert Monday morning when I visited her, but she was confused about the date. She seems to have a little trouble with her short-term memory (mainly what day it is).
She’s very frustrated. She said she’d gone from total independence to not being able to do anything. She became angry because we wouldn’t bring matches so she could smoke. (The ICU nurse said she’d order a nicotine patch.) The visit was going well until she thought that she’d asked for her purse and my sister ‘forgot’ it. She lashed out at my sister, and my sister lashed out back. After I left, my sister stayed. She said that mom wasn’t talking to her when she left. I talked to sis yesterday, and she said the ICU nurse told my mom she couldn’t smoke in the hospital, and mom said she was sorry she’d made my sister mad and wanted her to come back.
My sister said yesterday that mom had had a dream (the first one) about her late husband, and that they’d had a long conversation in the dream. She was happy Tuesday morning. Yesterday afternoon she had to have more surgery. I’d thought that they were going to remove the drain and put in a shunt, but they may have removed the cell mass. I’ll find out when I talk to my sister today.
Mom’s not ready to move. She’s very stubborn. Sis thinks she wants to be in Arizona for the anniversary of her husband’s death (31 December). That could be, but I think it’s mostly that she resents her loss of independence. She can’t live alone. She’ll either have to go to an assisted living place, or move in with my sister. My sister will have to build a room addition if that is going to happen, and that will take months. Mom does not want to come to Washington. (Complaining about the lack of a window she said, ‘I didn’t move to Phoenix to be in gloom.’)
I returned home to find a letter from the State of Washington Employment Security Department. It says that while I’m not eligible for WA benefits, they did receive a reply from the State of California saying that I have enough wages for an interstate claim against CA. I can cancel my WA claim and file the interstate claim. I need to call them today to discuss options. I also heard on NPR on the drive up that Manpower Inc. forcasts greater hiring in the first quarter of 2005.
I didn’t drive 27 hours straight on the way up. I stopped at my customary stopping place in Anderson (seven miles south of Redding). I’d left Arizona about 8:30 PST, and arrived in Anderson at 23:15 PST. I was on the freeway just before 8:00 yesterday morning, and arrived home at 20:30. Seattle traffic was bad, and the rain caused people to drive 60 or 65 mph in the 70 mph stretches north of Everett.
It’s cancer.
I talked to my sister today, and she said the oncologist said that mom has ‘months or years, depending on how she responds to treatment.’ She said there is the one tumour I’ve mentioned before, and two smaller ones. All are in mom’s cerebellum.
Mom called a little bit ago. She says her brain is polka-dot with tumours. She says she has weeks, and that my sister is being over-optimistic. I told her what I’d heard, and she says she prefers to look at the dark side. That way if she’s wrong, it’s a good surprise. She said the doctor said she’s in very good health for someone her age, which will be a factor.
Other than that, mom seems to be doing well. She’s walking better than she was when I was there for Thanksgiving. She’s even able to walk without the walker a little bit. She went outside today and got some fresh air, which she said was wonderful. (She also had three smokes.)
I don’t know it mom’s putting on a brave face, but she sounds quite chipper. She may be sent home tomorrow. Sis is staying on another week, and they’re looking for transport for mom’s radiation therapy.
I’m very sorry to hear about your mom, Johnny L.A.. I’ll keep a good thought for her, you, and your family.
I’m so sorry, Johnny. I wish you and your family strength for whatever may come.
Lots of good thoughts and prayers for everyone involved, Johnny.
Sending a renewed blast of good vibes your way.
Hang in there, Johnny.