One trick pony homosexuals

The BBQ Pit
1

Let me preface this post by saying that I’m not a homophobe, since I know that no matter how delicately I word this, somebody is going to call me one. I challenge you to find one anti-homosexual comment in the 13 months I’ve been posting here (under this name and under my old one, puffington). Quite the opposite; I’ve come to their defense on more than one occaision (not that they’re not perfectly capable of defending themselves).

Now then, since we have that disclaimer out of the way, let’s continue, shall we? I’m making this post as more of a gentle criticism than an outright flame. The individuals I’m thinking of here aren’t intentionally trying to piss anyone off, and for the most part, I enjoy their posts immensely.

But GOD DAMN, enough already, Esprix! We don’t need to be informed of every single article that Planet Out publishes! We KNOW there is a lot of injustice in this world and we know that much of it is directed at gays. You have our deepest sympathies and our sincere support. The thing that bothers me, though, is that you post basically the same damn thing to the Pit once or twice a week. Some article gets you all riled up and you have to share it with the board. Now this would be fine if it occurred once in a while or in extreme cases. A couple drunk guys getting kicked off a plane for kissing does not count!

You see, a lot of us feel very strongly about certain subjects. For you, it’s your homosexuality. For me, it’s an interest in drug culture, effects, etc. Even if I’m not going to use a drug, I still like to learn about it.

Sometimes it can be hard for me not to run straight to the pit and bitch about the latest injustices in the War on Drugs. But I resist that temptation. You know why? Because it gets stale pretty fucking quick. Because I would look and feel like a one dimensional character, a one trick pony: the drug guy. People would probably put up with me for a while, but eventually they’d learn to just ignore me because they’re sick of hearing the same thing over and over.

Now I’m not going to go review all your posts, Esprix, (like Satan did to jenkinsfan, once upon a time), but I’d wager dollars to donuts that the ratio of gay to non-gay material is pretty damn high.

Think about it…

2

Homophobe…well, you did say someone had to say it.

3

Joking.
But seriously, its a topic close to his heart. And if no one was interested, no one would reply post.

4

Geez, NS, if that was “gentle criticism”, then I’d hate to meet you when you’re feeling pissy.

(Remind me not to ask him what he thinks of my new hairstyle.)

5

Yeah, sorry about that. I guess I did get a little bit pissy in that post. Again I’d like to reiterate that I think Esprix is one of the best posters we have on these boards. I just feel that a little variety in subject matter is always a good thing.
And I haven’t seen your hairstyle, DDG, but I’m sure it looks great. :slight_smile:

6

I can’t help but agree with neutron. I’m sorry Esprix. I’m gay myself and although a lot of your posts were very informative (I basically came to this board because of AtGG I and II), it does get a bit old after a while.
Maybe it’s because I’m Dutch and never been that exposed to homophobia, but I think you can get way too upset about gay related issues. Can’t you just ignore it and think you’re the better person? I don’t think it helps the gay movement that much if you get riled up on every single injustice.

Cheers,
A.

7

Where’s the happy medium?

In a sense I agree with neutron, but if Esprix wanted to post an hourly update on injustices levied upon homosexuals, it would be no skin of my dick. I wouldn’t read them all of course, but I might peruse a few. So I don’t think that Aghris’s suggestion to just ignore it is the solution either. Being “the better person” shouldn’t include apathy.

So I guess what I’m trying to say, in my infinite wisdom is … “idunno.”

Esprix, post away if that’s what you want to do, but I’m sure you’re smart enough to realize that neutron’s argument is genuine, and some people will be put off, not by the content of your posts, but by the frequency thereof.

8

Just to inject some facts into the discussion, I did a random sampling.

Of ten recent threads started by Esprix, six were directly related to gay issues, two referred to being gay but only as part of another issue, and two were not about being gay at all (the thread about his asshole uncle who killed his grandmother’s cat, and a technical question to the moderators.)

Esprix is much likelier to post in threads concerning gay issues than other types. About half the forums he posts to (including his own) are forums that deal with issues of sexual orientation. In total, about 70% of his messages are about gay issues or are comments on his being gay; they’re also his longest and obviously most thought out messages, too (e.g. the non-gay-related messages are likelier to be short jokes or throwaway comments.) In conclusion, Esprix isn’t a one-trick pony, but he does do one trick a lot more than the others.

But the numbers mean nothing without comparisons. The real question is; if I searched everyone’s name, how many other folks would show similar propensities for posting on one topic?

9

If Esprix is a one-trick pony, most of us don’t have more than two ourselves. Case in point: all the damned flirting. You’d think we were all horny teenagers, the way we hijack threads like there’s no tomorrow!

Not that I’m comPLAINing about people who flirt with me. Just that Esprix isn’t the only person who posts more about one thing than any other.

10

On the one hand, go fuck yourself. On the other hand… actually, I don’t know if there is another hand.

Every day I come into work and do a search on my name to find where I’ve posted and where I’m mentioned. This morning I got this list:

[ul]#!Prince Philip - was that necessary, Cecil?
!One trick pony homosexuals
#!Hate speech - Jews vs. Gays
#!Spineless Anti-Gay Christians
Canadian Smarties - I’m not impressed
#To all those that hate me…
#!Don’t fly Mexicana if you’re queer
The Cool Kids, they come to Cali
Clinton Has Cost Me $55 With His 10 Round Clip BS
Haiku your fellow dopers
#!Ask the Gay Guy III!
Jack-ass Dean Tyler
Should Algore Throw in the Towel?
“Algore” - why is that funny?
#!Political statements, outing, the holidays and my ex
Sent me here with my question…[/ul]

That was from the past two days, #'d titles are ones I started, and !'d titles are gay-related by the OP.

So I’m currently discussing Cecil’s humor, my postings, hate speech, spineless Christians, candy, martyrdom, flying, California, gun control, haiku, ATGG, circumcision, the elections, the VP, and my office Christmas party.

This is the second time (first in the “Spineless Anti-Gay Christians”) thread someone has called me a one-trick pony, and others are agreeing.

Gee, perhaps I need to go back further into my posting history, as, indeed, over the past two days I’ve been kind of gay-oriented (to coin a phrase). Maybe we need to do a complete list of all my posts since I joined the SDMB to find a more exact ratio of gay-to-other-related topics I’ve posted about. Do we need to do a ratio between threads I’ve started vs. threads I’ve participated in? Do we need to discuss the gay/not-gay content of each post to get a clearer picture?

IRL, being gay ranks as high on my “things to think about on a minute-by-minute basis” as being heterosexual is to the bulk of you. Here, I enjoy the banter (plus I have a rep to uphold), and it often takes the form of queer issues. Plus, if I see a gay-related topic, it’s going to catch my eye more than, say, birth control, for the reasons already stated - go fig.

Not sure if I want to flame you, ignore you, be mad and sulk, or go post more queer news. I’ll have to cogitate on that one.

In the meantime, however, you can still go fuck yourself.

Esprix

11

LONGtime lurker, first time poster. Many, many recent threads have nearly prompted me to jump in and post, and this one struck me as well. Never have I encountered such an enlightened, well-informed group of folks who can take an OP like the above (which was gutsy, honest, and with which I tend to agree) and have an intelligent well formed discussion. I LOVE you guys, man! Ok, kind of mushy for the pit. Carry on.

12

There was a good 2-3 week period where probably half my posts dealt with me being a writer. Bitching about never being able to be a writer. My dreams of being a writer. Joy of writing. Other writers.

But eventually, I even got to the point where I said to myself “Look, everyone who’s paying attention to you knows this shit already. The rest don’t care. Hell, I wouldn’t care anymore if I were listening to myself.” So I slowed it down a bit.

neutron star, you’re right. There are quite a number of posters on this board who announce their Gayness with a capital “G” every chance they get. Many times it deals with the topic at hand and I think it’s great that I can have so many perspectives from so many different people on this board. Sometimes it comes right out of left field and I just sit there wondering if they figured we had forgotten they were gay since the last gay post they made.

I debated several times in writing this on whether I should just delete it all together. I certainly don’t wish for a flame war on the issue. But, in the end, I do agree with neutron and I thought that the truth ought to outweigh hurt feelings.

13

If you’ll excuse me, I think I’m going to go fuck myself now. :rolleyes:

That was really uncalled for, Esprix, even if this is the Pit. I won’t respond in kind, though.

You know, even if I do think about sex on a minute by minute basis, that doesn’t mean I have to post about it with the same frequency. I have a healthy sex drive, but if you can find more than 10 posts of mine in the last year that are even vaguely related to my own sexuality, then you’re a better searcher than I.

14

Wow Neuron I have to say taking on Esprix would not be the smartest thing I have ever seen you do.

In fact, I would put it in the “not a good idea” category.

Shaky moral ground. Well, that and its Esprix.

15

I can only speak for myself, but I am not all-consumed on a minute-by-minute basis of my heterosexuality, nor do I have to remind others in 80% of my posts that I am heterosexual.

16

Well, I look at it this way:
Esprix-would you rather be known as “The Gay Poster Who Just Happens to be Cool”, or “The Cool Poster Who Just Happens to be Gay?”

I mean, I don’t care one way or another…and yes, I understand that homosexuality is a big part of you…that’s great. It’s just that…people are starting to wonder if you are more, hmmm complex? More multi-faceted? More diverse personality?
I dunno…I mean, are you a person who is gay, or a GAY person?
I don’t think of myself as that hetero chick. (More like that strange Polish chick from Pittsburgh, but that’s a different story…)

17

Thank you - you got my point.

And IRL, I don’t. Here, where discussions run the gamut from the pointless to the profound, I am not a person, but merely an abstract idea, and that idea includes my views on gay topics. Discussion and debate lend themselves to activism, I suppose, in my case.

Esprix

18

You know, I bet Esprix talks about being gay as often as Coldfire talks about being Dutch or I talk about being a Canadian/Quebecer/Montrealer. It’s something that makes us different and something we feel we can share informative information on, not to mention something that affects our lives on an ongoing basis.

And considering that my sexual orientation constantly leaves me open to vicious political and physical assault, I think it’s something I’m going to be fairly interested in in a way heterosexuals are not.

19

Too late - I was responding in kind to your self-admitted “pissy” OP.

And although I might have more than ten posts that relate to my own sexuality, you will find that the vast majority do not, excepting, perhaps, the past few days. Oh, the horror.

And, if we’re going to be frank, when you’re a sexual minority, your are keenly aware in every facet of your life how much your sexuality is intertwined - from office Christmas parties to marriage. My apologies if, perhaps, you got a taste of what I face, both subtly and gross, each and every day of my life.

Esprix

20

[QUOTE]
*Originally posted by Esprix *
**
[QUOTEHere, where discussions run the gamut from the pointless to the profound, I am not a person, but merely an abstract idea **[/QUOTE]

Now, I think that comment is bullshit. Anyone here who posts on a regular basis becomes a “real person” to the others. Your picture is on the People Pages and you look like a person, not an idea, to me.

Again, this is only my opinion.