"Other" Women - Stop it, stop it, STOP IT!

The BBQ Pit
1

I have finally come to terms with myself. My awesomeness. I am smart, funny, clever, classy and usually mellow. I don’t play games. I try not to hurt people. I’m considerate and compassionate.

So why can’t I keep a man? I have figured out why - OTHER women!

Listen up, bitches. Just STOP it!

You, the OTHER woman who trumped my 3-year relationship by waltzing in, acting slutty and finding it OK to fuck another girl’s man. Yes, he is a flaming idiot and is just as at fault for those particular transgressions. But once I put my foot down you came barreling back with cries of “I’m pregnant” (lie) and “we both have herpes now ha!” (lie). You suckered him into marrying you by playing the helpless and needy card. You fought harder and lied more and played more games - you won. good riddence.

You, the OTHER woman who led my man on by being cute and needy. Needy because you just broke up with his best friend and came crying to him, playing on his good nature and total sweetness. Making him think he had a chance with you. He didn’t, did he? He had a chance with ME but he let it all go to sit by his phone and wait for you to need him. Did you ever really need him? You just wanted to be friends, right? Are you friends with him now? No. bitch.

You, the OTHER woman who made a completely rational man think that ALL women were like you - petty, pushy, materialistic and whiny. I tried for 2 years to convince him otherwise by stroking his ego, staying on the d-low, never being pushy, never asking for anything. Perhaps I was too good to be true. Apparently so, because he ended up decding that HE was as petty, pushy, materialistic and whiny as YOU. Wasted my time. Thanks for ruining him.

You, the OTHER womEn…the ones who made him think girls were naggy and demanding. That they would all break your heart. You, the one who liked to show up on occasion to flirt and make him think he could have you back. You, the one who toyed with him and broke his spirit. Could he have a girl who was cool, fun and let him do his own thing? He’ll never know.

You, the OTHER woman…the OLDER woman. YOU ARE 37 YEARS OLD! Thirty seven!! How old is he??? TWENTY THREE. Goddammit motherfucking FOURTEEN YEAR DIFFERENCE THERE! I realize he is “mature” for his age. Lord knows I know that - why else would I be hopelessly in love with him? At least he and I are in the same fucking age bracket. How pathetic are you that you need to prey on smart little boys in your office? How many divorces have led you to realize that you just “wanna have fun” and “can’t stand men my own age”? Maybe it’s not them, it’s YOU!

When he realizes what a skank you are, and that you are just using him for sex, and he finally realizes I am the one he should be with - if you DARE come busting in with some sort of “I AM PREGNANT” bullshit I swear to God I will go apeshit and curse a pox on you and your family (since I cannot wish or threaten death here).

YOU OTHER WOMEN JUST FUCKING GIVE IT UP!!! Give up your games, stop making guys into blathering idiots who are afraid of committment, afraid of girls with a backbone, afraid that all girls might be playing games, afraid to be taken AGAIN…

I know I am not as pretty as you or as petitte as you, or rich as you or as “headstrong” (bitchy) as you, mean as you or unreliable as you…but goddammit I KNOW I am SMARTER than you, CLASSIER than you, FUNNIER than you, NICER than you and have never ever in my life deliberately hurt a man and ruined him for the rest of us.

Fuck off. all of you. whores.

2

Maybe you should try choosing guys who aren’t likely to cheat on with the other woman?

3

Well, personally, it sounds like you need to choose better men, and leave the other women out of it.

Honestly, you’re the one choosing the doofi (doofuses?) that are falling for this crap.

YMMV

4

Consider yourself lucky. You found out he was a cheat before the marriage. If you take him back, you’re as big a fool as he and she take you for. She didn’t ruin him, he was already ruined. If it wasn’t her, it would have been someone else.

It’s harsh, but it’s true. Wait until someone real comes along.

5

So, would this be the female equivalent of “chicks don’t go for nice guys”?

I think the real problem here is your taste in men, ZipperJJ. Sure, the women you’re pitting are doing some reprehensible things, but it’s the guys in your life who are stupid enough to fall for them.

Try to aim higher, next time.

6

Sorry you have to go through this. But you should be pitting your man too.

She/they may be sluts, skanks, and manipulators, but your man did cheat on you.

7

this is like…5 dudes, 6 girls…sorry shoulda made that clear.

Apparently I am dumb enough to fall for self-proclaimed “nice guys” alot in my humble 6-or-so years of dating. But not dumb enough to find all of these qualities in one dude.

this is why i don’t socialize much with girls. geez guys, merow

8

I can totally see your point of view. But these other wise folks are right. If your so-called man was stong enough on the inside to see what a good thing he had in you all along, you’d be with him now. But he wasn’t, and he isn’t. He was open to getting fucked with, and that’s exactly what happened to him. And as a man, a married one at that, I have no compunction about saying this: if you’re a man and you can’t keep your dick in your pants when you ought to, you deserve everything that happens to you.

You loved him, and he proved himself spectacularly unworthy of your attention. Repeatedly. Why do you still want this man? That’s something you have to work out.

9

I think it’s great that you are being true to yourself by being the classy and smart woman.

But he really wasn’t as rational as you say he was. And you can’t blame his feelings and thoughts on anyone but him, even though I know you hate to see how it hurts him or makes him bitter.

Stand your ground. Others with confidence will see your intelligence and class and charm and will find you. You are going to be surprised at the directions your life takes.

And I hope you have women friends that you can count on and don’t see all of the “other women” as being like these turkeys have been.

Sorry you are hurting. I remember how bad it feels.

10

Read the above again.

In fact, with the ever-gracious Zoe’s permission, print it out, laminate it and carry it in case of hormonal emergency.

11

I have found the problem:

Possibly rude, offensive question, but with a, hopefully, very evident and very real point:

Do you have any balls? No, I won’t resort to the supermarket psychology thinking that you don’t respect yourself and actually like being in this position. No, what I read from you is a chance that your insecurity might be at play, that you’re not as strong or as independent as you should be (if your description of your nature is to be trusted… which I do). Smart women don’t try to convince guys of anything. Smart women know when to say “fuck it” and move on.

I think what you need at this point is to stay away from anything sounding remotely close to “commitment” or “serious”. That’s not to say you should become some sort of slut or up your relationship activity to higher levels of discomfort, but to know that, guys, they’re not all going to work and that having a head start in leaving them is actually good for you. The time will come when you will find there’s someone who doesn’t play by these rules and who looks to you in a different light. It’ll be scary, but it’ll be worth it.

12

Exactly. :rolleyes:

13

Meow yourself. FIVE guys? I’m seeing a pattern here, honeybunches, and it ain’t calico.

How did she waste your time? She didn’t ruin him-if he was as rational as you claim, he’d never have gone with her in the first place. No, instead YOU wasted your own time panting after this loser. And why would you take him back when he realizes that you’re the girl for him? Don’t you have any pride? Why would you sit around waiting for this guy?

Get a backbone, and get some self-respect. These guys are LOSERS. They’re not worth the time and heartache you’re going through. Take some time to yourself, and stay far far away from these pathetic specimens of the male species.

14

Do you think every woman loses virtually every boyfriend to “other women”? I mean, there’s a pattern here, and it involves who’s picking the guys.

I don’t want to chastize you here - just make you aware that you’re somehow zeroing in on the sort of guys who do that. Five guys is way too many for it to be a coincidence, which means you’re doing something wrong in the picking.

There’s always gonna be other women out there, especially if you find a quality man. You can’t count on them staying away - you have to find a guy who’s strong enough to resist them.

I hope you have better luck in relationships in the future. There are decent guys out there; I should know, every guy I’m ever interested in is paired off with one . . .

:: sigh ::

15

Wow! Strong Bad’s Sister posts here now! Awesome!

16

What’s this I hear about a girl looking for a nice twenty-three year-old man to help mend a broken heart?

ZipperJJ, how you doin?

17

While very harsh, I find this essay has some valid points: Why “Nice Guys” are often such LOSERS. Note, I don’t believe all nice guys fall into the generalizations made in the essay, but I’d wager you’ll recognize at least one of your previous boyfriends in the charateristics. Maybe you also need to see if any of the charateristics detailed in there could be applied to you as well? You are the common denominator, you should ask yourself why you are drawn to that type of guy at the least. Painful as what I’m saying is, it can’t be worse than what you’ve already been through, and might go through again if you don’t do learn not to repeat the pattern.

18

To clarify a bit, that essay IMO applies to both males and females equally. I don’t know the OP, but it seems to me that either they are the “nice guy”, or they are a non-malignent magnet for “nice guys”. Either way, it’s a painful way to live, and needs some soul searching to solve.

19

Why the hell are you carrying a torch for a loser like that? If he’s got a head on a swivel and eyeballs he has to keep stuffing back in his head, LET the other woman have him. He ain’t worth it.

20

God, I’ve never even met you, and I don’t want to see you anymore.