In “Chasing Amy” Brodie and the lesbian (I forgot her name) had a discussion of one-up-manship concerning permanent scars they got from having sex. So, I’ll go first:
I chipped my tooth on my girlfriends tongue piercing, and two years ago I was giving this girl some serious stick action while she laid on the open ground. Mid thrust I fell out and slammed my one eyed soldier into a small patch of gravel…I still have the marks.
So how 'bout the dopers?
My hubby and I were doing it doggy style. He aimed the wrong way and slammed into my pubic bone. Bruised his member and tore me a little. No sex for 3 weeks.
If anything non-hypo alergenic is used on my nether regions, I get chemically burned midway through. Raw burning flesh is never good, As I scream in agony for him to get off. Even Astroglide burns!
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I have nothing to add to the thread (fortunately…) except that it was Banky having the conversation with Alyssa in Chasing Amy. Excellent scene, even better movie.
</Nit-pick>
Hmm. I have two candidates for this…
1- In my first serious, long makeout session the girl laid on top of me for about 2-3 hours. When we finally were walking back home I had a case of blueballs so bad I could hardly move. She felt so guilty it was actually comical.
2- The girl after the girl in #1 “tried” to give me a BJ. I say “tried” (and she volunteered to do this, mind you. I didn’t ask) because she half-heartedly sucked for a while, then tried to finish me with her hand. It felt like someone was trying to rip my d**k off! I never let her touch me again.
All of my scars are emotional.
Never ever ever ever let a guy put his hands anywhere on your nether regions right after he just finished chopping habaneros for the chili.
Also, if you’re having sex propped up against the arm of a couch, make sure the couch isn’t a 20-year-old thing in someone’s basement. We had to tell his parents that he did it while lunging for a shot when we were playing ping-pong. I ended up with a nice bruise after that one.
Yep, got the scars to prove it.
Mid summer, mid teens, ‘Three Times A Lady’ (this’ll work !) playing again and again and again and doing my damnest to engineer the lose of mutual virginity on my parents sofa. Serious arousal, fumbling, inexperienced girlie, my zipper, PAIN THAT NO ONE SHOULD EVER HAVE TO EXPERIENCE.
The zipper bit me a short way down from the tip and it bled like a geezer. Couldn’t bear to go to the small town hospital so it soaked through to show to my jeans. It got better, though, as passion passed and by morning the tide had stopped but I carry a small mark. Haven’t put it on my passport as an identifying mark.
Every time I hear the Commodore’s I go cross-eyed, :eek: .
If it isn’t painful then you are not doing it right.
Remember, where there’s a whip, there’s a way. 
two words: rug burn.
brick burn isn’t so nice either 
My most recent gf decided to surprise me by shaving it. Women have complained to me that my beard stubble scratches their face. Imagine trying to get off by rubbing your most tender parts on something like that! We had to abstain for a month.
If you wax, pluck, or use a depilatory the hair grows back without the sharp edge that you get from shaving.
While we’re on the subject: Another gf found out the hard way that Nair can cause severe chemical burns to…umm…squamous epithelium.
I remember one fine summer day, outdoors, both GF and I were drunk and decided to go for it, right there. Pull the jean shorts to one side, and presto, instant access. We going at it and it was great, but I vaguely remember feeling some discomfort, but I was drunk and it was fun, so I blew it off. Next morning, however, not only do I wake up with a hangover but a blister that ran the length of my, well, you know. Apparently the jeans were rubbing against it, but in my drunken lust I didn’t care. No sex for a week after that. 
The worst injury I’ve inflicted was less sexual in nature, than romantic.
In high school, sitting on the couch with my girlfriend, my arm around her shoulder. I got up to put on some romantic music. Then, moving to sit back down and re-hook my arm around her in anticipation of some serious the lip-locking … WHAP … elbow right in her eye. Gave her a pretty good shiner.
I certainly was Captain Suave in high school.
Well, I have the scar from my episiotomies. I guess that technically counts.
Does really, really boring count as painful? Just curious
I think really, really boring could count as painfully BAD.
Let’s see…I slept with a guy whose dick was so big I faked it after a few SECONDS so he’d get the hell off of me and I could go home. No scars…
Had sex under a jungle gym in Michigan in the middle of February…when I got up my ass was numb. Which is ok, because so were his knees.
AND…I’ve given birth three times. I don’t think that counts, though.
Oh yeah, if boring is counted as painful, then I have definitely had painful sex. The worst part was that this guy thought he was some kind of latin lover who was teaching me new tricks. I did my When Harry Met Sally impression and couldn’t wait for him to leave.
Hmm I have been on the receiving end of some really bad toothy blow jobs. It only drew blood once. Another time my ex was doing some action with something a little too big and I ripped. OUCH! That really hurt. I won’t go into too many details though. It got better after about a month.
HUGS!
Sqrl
When we were teenagers my husband I used to have sex so often for such long periods of time that it actually wore pieces of his skin of, ripped, torn. Ouch. Not that that stopped us or slowed us down. The poor guy still has the scars.
Rug burns, bad hand jobs, a zipper issue (gotta remember lower the jeans below knee level), and charle horses in a thigh and the arch of my foot after running a 10K and then going over to the GF’s house are the extent of it. No lasting scars as proof though.
A girl I was seeing and I were going at it in my Jeep, its lifted and larger than normal tires. I was sitting in the passenger seat and she was stradling me when she slipped and fell out. She said it hurt, got back up and we finished everything up. Later she said it was hurting worse and turned out she actually broke it.
Never really had anything form relationship-wise with her, but I give her a lot of credit for being staying focused through a bone break 
CandyMan
CandyMan
CandyMan
(That was for Michi)