If I go on a stroll with her, will we be walking abreast?
“Cheezit, the cops!”
Pre-sliced Swiss? I remember when men made their own dick cheese!
Fat, female-free Philly fellow fetishistically frotts fromage? Freaky.
Penn police possess powerful “pusillanimous perv” patrol? Priceless!
Thread title: Philly Police warn public of perv on the loose…
Latest post by: Slow Moving Vehicle
Hmmm… 
That wasn’t my car, I was never there, it was two other dudes and it never happened, anyway. I don’t even own a fondue pot.
This guy sounds dangerous. He might be a feta-phile.
Now we know why there’s a shortage of Velveeta. 
He’ll be caught soon.
I hear they have Co-Jack on the case.
mmm
This pub, this very pub we’re just sitting in. I built it, with me own hands! But do they call me the Pubmaker? Naa!
See the wall over there, that protects our town? I built it, with me own hands! But do they call me the Wallmaker?
And the bridge, you know, that crosses our river, I built it, with me own hands! But do they call me the Bridgemaker?
But I tell ya, man! YOU FUCK ONE GOAT CHEESE!
In Philadelphia the locals know to order their perverts “with”.
What a muenster! But his case is being processed.
/thread
The suspect is an overweight white guy?
Has anyone determined the whereabouts of Rush Limburger?
He should just return to his little cottage.
Looks like the Cheese Pervert bleu his cover…
*Police say they have arrested the so-called “Swiss Cheese Pervert,” the man accused of using Swiss cheese to sexually proposition women in the Philadelphia area.
Christopher Pagano was arrested on Thursday afternoon as part of a joint investigation between Philadelphia and Norristown Police, officials tell NBC10.
The 41-year-old Norristown resident has allegedly been spotted driving up to women and asking them if they would like to get paid to see him put Swiss cheese on his genitals.*
Wait a sec-- he was offering to pay? The man’s a damn job creator! Typical fascist pigs standing in the way good, honest enterprise.
If Sam hadn’t used it a couple of posts ago I would say it was a cottage industry. But gouda for him for trying to stimulate the economy. He camembert to see anyone out of work.
Bad news guys. I checked the Philly jail menu. Friday is cold cuts with Swiss Cheese, mayo, and white bread.
The jailers might want to put a do not disturb sign on the suspect’s cell door right after lunch Friday.
I think the guy should seek a plea deal. There is an Abondance of evidence against him.