Play it Safe, or Take Chances?

Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share
21

I was stuck in a rut and vacillated for months before finally resolving to do something about it. I found a little house in a cool part of town and signed a lease after just a couple of days of debate. Three months later, I have not regretted it.

The rent is a bit more expensive, but I have the wiggle room to pull it off. The hassle of the move was not fun or cheap, but I survived it. Everything seems a tad bit better since I moved. I have more time in the day since I’m closer to work, and if I’m missing something in the refrigerator, I don’t have to drive to the grocery store. I don’t really have to drive anywhere. And my cats are happy too because they can go outside. Plus, I have a porch. I’ve always wanted a porch.

The discomfort’s not going to go away on its own. It will only get worse.

22

My life seems determined to throw me out of my comfortable rut whether I like it or not. Seems to happen every seven years or so, everything goes pear-shaped. I do not choose to take risks, so much as risks are thrust upon me. I am at one of those turning points now, so it will be interesting to see what happens.

Be careful what you wish for.

23

People are usually not satisfied at their life looking back and seeing that they didn’t take those chances. By taking those chances we find out who we really are and start really living.

You really said a lot when you said you heard your parents, they are still defining your life, their fears and their desires for you are still effecting you. But there comes a time in a child’s life when they have to reach beyond the walled garden their parents set up for them.

24

I’m right there with you, for true.

The Mr and I, used to be the poster children for never growing up. We would save money then head out to see the world, for 3, 6, 8, once even 10 months, at a time. We roamed through Asia, the Indian sub continent, the Himalayas, South America, it was all kinds of awesome and we didn’t give a whit that our cohorts thought us surely mad.

When his Mom had a stroke that left her bedridden everything changed in one fell swoop. Bought a house, brought in MIL, became housefrau 24/7 caregiver, he became ‘the man’, carrying all of the financial weight. Suddenly we were all about mortgages, and meds, diapers, laundry, insurance, 3 squares, etc. I’m not sure who was more surprised, us or our friends, at how things had shifted for us.

6 yrs later she passed and now we hardly recognize ourselves or our lives. At first it was enough to get all that stroking from everyone who was convinced we’d moved in the right direct in our lives. Settled, structure, security. I’m not saying it isn’t nice, and I do love our house and neighbourhood.

But, as God is my witness, I could sell it all tomorrow, throw caution to the wind and take off, I swear. In fact I’ve already once proposed, as a retirement plan; Sell it all, and head out to travel away the rest of our lives. Should it look like we’ll out live the funds, we’ll just take up riskier and riskier activities. I’d much rather die zip lining at 87yrs than die of boredom at 95yrs in a nursing home, to be honest.

It was not a suggestion that was taken seriously - at the time. But it got him thinking, that’s for sure. Mark my words, the day will come when I will be posting from some where far flung, because this rut cannot hold, I’m certain.

I feel ya, and I’m right there with you.

25

Obviously, none of you are my parents. They were both very Sensible:

“Don’t take silly chances.”
“Never marry till you have lived together.”
“Never leave a job till you have another job.”
“Never get in debt–if you don’t have the money, don’t buy anything.”
“The poor house is full of people who took foolish risks.”
“Always have something to fall back on.”
“Really? Writing?”

Mind you, they were always supportive and happy for my successes! But my sister and I got good, common sense drummed into our beans, and I have enough historical perspective to think, “you’re living on velvet, kid–keep yer head down and don’t rock the boat.”

26

I plan to do something different as soon as my youngest is “settled” into adulthood, until my parents need me to care for them.

I’m not sure how much time that will give me, but I intend to use it.

My only issue is avoiding places that are prone to earthquakes.

27

I think the poor houses have been empty for over a hundred years.

28

Good, I’ll have my choice of rooms!

29

I do not agree that this is a good time to be changing jobs. Stick with what you got. I am all for taking chances, but not while the economy is this bad. Unless you’re in the Dakotas or Nebraska, a decent job is hard and I mean hard to find still.

This doesn’t mean you should give up. By all means, update your resume and look. Two things will happen. You’ll find a much better job or you’ll see there isn’t much out there and you’ll come to appreciate what you have.

Don’t forget the luxury of insurance. It’s nice to have a chest pain and be able to go to the emergency room. Even nicer to fall down and hit your mouth and have your chipped tooth repaired. Seriously, could you surviving getting hit in the mouth and getting the front teeth chipped or knocked out.

If you’re bored there are lots of volunteer place to got to. Start a blog or online website and fool around. Go to school and learn something you always wished you knew. Like a language, pottery or how this crummy economy works. Take up knitting or an instrument.

If you haven’t looked for a job since 2008, let me tell you, as an HR manager it’s a different world now. You will be shocked.

By all means look around and see, but do nothing till you’re 100% sure

30

Mmmmmmmm…velvet…

:smiley:

31

My life has been a long series of playing it safe, punctuated by the taking of amazing chances. (Who the hell moves to NYC with $17 in his pocket and no resume?)

In fact, I feel an “amazing chance” coming up very soon.

32

Sell! Sell! Sell! no wait… Buy! Buy! Buy!

33

Isn’t there a middle ground? Take chances but try to establish some form of safety net / contingency plan in case you fail.

34

Ok, how about changing something outside your job? Come up with a new hobby, a new goal, find something to do. Whadda ya think, is that enough to break the rut? Or do you need a major life-altering change?

35

So what’d you do?

36

“Never make a llife decision for yourself based on someone else’s needs.” I made that up because I did, and it sucked.
I’m not saying do something rash. Not at all. But we never know what’s going to happen. What if your child is almost independent and your parents suddenly become dependant on you well before the time period that you thought they would? You would have had no window of opportunity at all.
It might be something to think about.