Politically Incorrect Ways to Deal with the Terrorist./Vote Ujest

The BBQ Pit
1

After we capture, return, and the terrorists are given a fair trial where they are found guilty… instead of sentancing these individuals to death ( thus making them martyrs in their own nutjob group) or putting them in solitary confinement ( thus making them martyr’s in their own little nutjob group and possible attempts made to liberate them, thus endangering the lives of more decent Americans) **I **Shirley Ujest have come up with a plan to make things easier:
Let us say that there are 50 terrorists tried, convicted and sentanced to life inprisonment. Put all of these bastards in fifty prisons across the nation. High Maximum Security joints that house the nastiest inmates.

The night before the terrorist joins Sing-Sing-Attica, run on all the TV’s in prison the entire coverage of the bombings, aftermath, trial and who’s who’s of the terrorists. Lock all the inmates in their cells and have the terrorist walk every floor, by every cell, before, say lunch.

Then, open the cell doors.

Whether the terrorist would be instantly murdered or slowly and painfully tortured to death is up to the discretion of the prisoners. I trust them to handle the situation, they are the professionals, afterall.

The Taliban (or whomever) will be shocked, possibly contact Amnesty International for violation of their peoples fundamental rights, blah blah. AI, will not return their calls. US’s response will be, “It’s prison. It’s a riot. These things can flare up at any time whenever and the safety of our staff is paramount and the outside security was never compromised, look this guy had it coming, et all.Look, it’s prison, not the friggin’ Ritz. Get over it.”
When the Taliban (or whomever) discover one of their own was murdered and they want to retaliate, we will give them an old plane meant for the scrap pile, directions and enough fuel (There will be a outside control to the steering mechanism incase Mr. Nutjob decides to do change diretions.), to drive that plane right into that prison (where all the staff are outside inspecting new rose bushes or something).

By doing something so politically incorrect, we remedy many problems. 1)What to do with the terrorists. 2)Thinning out the prison population. 3)Reducing the money spend on harboring a segment of society that we don’t want to house or deal with and frankly, is out of control. 4)It will reduce crime in our country and 5) send a message to terrorists not to ever fuck with us again or your little helper in Tuesdays Massacre is going to be Fresh Meat and summarily, Fish Food in one very loooooong afternoon at Sing Sing.

I shared this thought with a few friends and one said that they thought I had the basis to run for President based on this platform alone.

So, that said, who’d vote for me?

**Shirley Ujest ** *The Politically Incorrect Party. *Motto: Fuck You And The Horse You Rode In.

2

That’s pretty good. I like it better than my idea, which is to hang them from the torch of the Statue of Liberty.

3

Good idea. Mine was to house them in jail until they rebuild the WTC. When construction begins, take them to the site, let them watch awhile, then take them where they are pouring concrete for the foundations. Lower them in the hole and pour the concrete over them thus entombing them alive in the foundations.

4

You people are cruel. Cruel, cruel, cruel.

Besides, the proper thing to do is to boil them to death in lard and feed the remains to hogs. Thus they end up as what they really are–pig turds.

5

After they die (in whichever way you guys choose) I want their version of hell to be this:

Each day, throughout eternity, they have to relive what the victims went through. Each day, it will be a different fate, since the victims each died in different ways. But what they’ll know each day when they wake up is that later on that day they’ll have to go through something terrifying and die at the end of it. And then the next day, do it again.

Frankly, I think the times inbetween, thinking about it, knowing it’s upcoming, will be better punishment than the dying part day after day.

But as for the death that gets them to eternity? The more I think about it, the more I want it to be humane. To prove who the real animals are. Let them also go through eternity knowing they got the kindness they could never in a million years of restitution and remorse deserve.

6

They should be thrown into a muddy hole and left to die of thirst. Maybe give them a cup of filthy water once every 3 days to prolong it a little, then stop giving them water.

Shirley’s idea, however, would be easier to pull off.

7

So now the prisoners in our prisons are our friends? Some of those assholes have committed crimes as bad as the terrorists. To me they are American terrorists preying on their fellow citizens.

I say put them in a room, tied to chairs, no food or water, in total darkness, and play Kathie Lee Giffords latest CD over and over and over…(oh first cut their vocal chords so they cant scream and drown out the noise errrrr music…

8

Well, someone once said that “Hell is other people”. I propose we lock them up in a little room with Jerry Falwell and Pat Robertson.

9

DDG – that is deliciously evil! :smiley:

10

Or just throw all of their sorry asses into Leavenworth. And tattoo “I helped murder children” on their foreheads.

11

I expected better of you Shirley Ujest. You are soft. You have allowed those fucks to debase you. That is surrender.

12

I say alternating days of

  1. savage, non-lethal beatings
  2. rest

That’s the whole schedule. Meals as necessary, but not often. Water only if it’s brackish or comes from the prison toilet.

13

Oh ye of little imagination. :smiley:

From what little I understand of “Radical Islam”, the body and soul must be defiled before execution. Perhaps we force them to eat a nice, hearty breakfast of sausage, bacon and pork chops, all washed down with a nice, fresh-squeezed glass of pig blood.

Then take 'em to the square and have a 300-lb Saudi weightlifter behead them with a scimitar.

THEN feed the bodies to the pigs.

All of it- every terrible, bloody second of it- broadcast live on a CNN special edition. No breaks, no cuts, let it be perfectly clear that THAT prisoner ate of an ‘unclean’ animal, then was almost immediately executed, then the bodies are immediately dumped in the hog trough, and the camera, never stopping, is set up on a tripod and left there 'til the bodies and bones are gone, and the pigs have shat 'em into the muck.

Actually, the one thing I’d *love[i/] to see… I’m not a religious person in any capacity, but I’d really, really like to see 'ol Osama sitting there in his bunker, all smug and happy, and have the shade of one of the terrorists appear, ghostlike…

“Osama! Osama! Listen to me! I’ve been permitted to appear to you, I haven’t much time! Osama! The thing about the virgins for us in the afterlife? The part where those we kill become our slaves in Heaven? It’s not true! God is pissed offright now, I cannot describe the unspeakable punishments those we used to consider martyrs are subjected to! I must go, my time is up. Damn you Bin Laden! We all damn you! Your time is coming, there can no longer be any salvation for you…”

And the shade disappears.

14

djf:

I’ve a friend who works on staff at a State prison here in California. He informed me that some prisoners made a comment along the lines of supporting the terrorists. They’re now separated from the general prison population for an obvious reason.

I say what we do with the murderers is to give them a fair and impartial trial, and if found guilty, to punish them with the sentence prescribed by law.

That’s what the terrorists are trying to destroy: our way of life. Don’t let that happen.

& I second the comment above: I also expected better of you, SUJ.

15

Shirl, I’d vote for you for any position you’d care to run for. I do like your ideas; the problem seems to me we have to catch the buggers before we can do anything with them.

To that end, I propose we begin an immediate bombardment of Afghanistan - not with the usual bombs, however, but with nice little “Care” packages, filled with all the things we can think of that the Taliban prohibits or deplores. We could drop packages filled with booze, cigarettes and Playboy magazines. We could also send over razors and shaving cream (if I’m not mistaken, the Taliban prohibits shaving) and since the education of women is forbidden, maybe some issues of Cosmo. If the Taliban wants it stopped, all they have to do is turn over anyone whose name sounds like “Gin Sodden.”

What do you think - got a place for me in your cabinet?

16

Sorry, that won’t compile. Circular reference problem. Cosmo is 100% negatively correlated with the education of women.

How about some works by Muslim feminists?

17

You have a point there, AHunter3 - I was just having a happy time envisioning thousands of Afghani men returning home to wives who would scream at them, “Li li li li li! You no-good son of a camel dung shoveler! You only scored a ‘12’ on the Rate Your Husband quiz! And no, I didn’t fix any dinner - I’m going on a diet!”

18

Nah, decomposing bodies would compromise the structural integrity of the concrete.

Don’t ask me how I know that.

19

Some of my relatives are in jail. What in the hell are you thinking???

20

I say line up in the middle of NYC and allow the families of victims stone them to death with small pieces uf rubble frrom the buildings. Very small pieces so it would be a LONG lingering torture!