I hope my thread title is self-explanatory. I’ll start, then everyone join in!
Obviously, these should be for celebrities who are not yet dead:
For Ray Stevens: Say It Isn’t So, Ethel!
For Ray Romano: Everyone Loved Him…to Death
For Ronald Reagan: Bedtime.
For Carol Burnett: I’m So Glad We Had This Time Together
Arnold Schwarzenneger: I Won’t be Back.
Don McLean : Bye, Bye Mister American Pie
Shirley MacLaine, however: I’ll be Back.
The Washington’s Post’s Style Invitational ran a contest along similar lines last year. A few of my favorites
The Post’s contest allowed you to use people who are already dead. Anyone else feel a little bit creepy about this thread? Some of Eve’s pre-death posts have been a little too close for comfort.
Hope Doesn’t Spring Eternal
Shatner Boldly Goes
Sir Rhosis
Brando got an offer he couldn’t refuse
Newman: Somebody Up There Likes Him
DeNiro: You Talkin’ To Me?
Eastwood: Made his day
Michael Jackson Beat It
Ronald Reagan Says ‘I May Be Dead, I Don’t Recall’
Bob Hope Found Dead on Road to Rio
DMX DOA
Gerald Ford Takes Final Trip
John Leguizamo: Now Considerably Less Annoying
Burt Reynolds Can’t Act (Because He’s Dead)
Davy Jones Takes Last Train to Deadsville
Heh, heh, heh . . .
Sidney Poitier: Guess Who’s Not Coming to Dinner?
Arnold Schwarzenegger - “Terminated Too - Judgement Day”
Warren Beatty - “Heaven Can’t Wait”
Arnold Schwarzenegger - “Terminated Too : Judgement Day”
Warren Beatty - “Heaven Can’t Wait”
[Slight Hijack]
Does anyone else remember the episode of SNL that Dana Carvey hosted a few years back, where he did a skit of Peter Jennings recording soundbytes about Gerald Ford “just in case”, before he went on vacation?
“Gerald Ford eaten by wolves today… he was delicious.”
[/Slight Hijack]
For the next member of Queen to die. 
“Another One Bites the Dust”
I was shocked that nobody used the headline “Princess Dies”.
Bruce Willis: Die Easy
Humphrey Bogart: The Big Sleep. ( Ok, that was a gimme.)
Braveheart Stops beating. So long Riggs.
Bob Hope, thanks for the memories.
Morganna the kissing bandit, thanks for the mammaries.
Boss, your plane has landed. Ricardo Maltaban
She ship has come in. Gloria Stewart, RIP.
Karl Malden Left Home Without it. Rip.
It’s about NOTHING! Jerry Seinfeild
“What’s it all about, Alfie.” Michael Caine
Kirk Douglas: Spartacus has left the Colesseum.
Ann Rice: Fangs for the Memories
Divine Brown: All dressed up and no one to blow.
Hugh Grant " Ack- choo-aly, I am dead."
QEII " Fuck, that dimwit Chuckles has my job now."
I am Ed Zotti! Cecil Adams revealed.
“My Comeback has finally ended, now I will go away.” Cher.
Dennis Miller: ranting no more.
Bill O’Reilly Stops Spinning.
Abe Vigoda: No Longer Still Alive
Please allow me to introduce myself…Jagger RIP