Q: So did you sleep with your new girlfriend yet?
A: Internet made easy.
Q: What would the Internet be without pop-up ads?
A: Not knowing who they are doesn’t make them not interesting.
Q: KCSuze why don’t your ‘wonder twins’ have names?
A: Two Slim Jims and a bottle of coke.
Q: What do you call a bachelor’s breakfast?
A: There’s only two ways to do it: face down and face up.
Q: How can you rebuilt the “Old Man of the Mountains”?
A: Some tomato sauce and a glass of port ought to do the trick.
Q: According to Dr. Lecter, what ELSE goes good with liver?
A: Goobers
Q: Mr. Lecter… what is your least favorite snack?
A: lower than whale poop
Q: How low would the Bush Administration have to go to be beaten in the 2004 elections by Polycarp?
A: “Are we there yet?”
Q: What is your vote for Polycarp for Prez’s campaign slogan, 'Beast?
A: A chicken in every pot
Q: What is your vote for Polycarp for Prez’s campaign slogan, 'Beast?
A: It doesn’t taste as bad as you’d expect, although the texture is a bit peculiar.
Q: What was the answer Monica Lewinsky gave to the question the networks bleeped out?
A: Hannibal Hamlin never played Charlie Brown!
Q. Why did John Wilkes Booth’s plays sell more tickets than Hannibal Hamlin’s speeches?
A. Because he likes his moustache that way.
Q: So, why is Adolf’s mustache a direct rip-off of Charlie Chaplin’s?
A: Rum, bum, and concertina.
Q: What are the three main attractions of the Bottomless Mexican Cantina?
A: Ornithorhynchus anatinus
Q: What’s a fancy-shmancy way of saying “Duckbilled Platypus?”
A: I could never shave my head.
Q: Why don’t you be Michael Jordan for Halloween?
A: You don’t want to lose it again.
Q: Why shouldn’t I join the club for born-again virgins?
A: The marmalade tasted better.
Q: Why didn’t you eat your toast?
A: The face was already squished.
Q. Why didn’t you vote for Bush
A. Why do we always answer questions with other questions?
Q: What makes you think I’m avoiding the question?
A: The last ever taping of “Wheel of Fortune.”