Q: what will it take to hammer some sense into him?!
A: in a few more hours it won’t matter…
Q: what will it take to hammer some sense into him?!
A: in a few more hours it won’t matter…
Q: How many times should I post this to try to hammer some sense into him?
A: He’ll stop doing that after an hour or so.
Q:Your friend Marley’s running rampant inside the food court; what shall we do?
A: At times like this, I wish I knew a Great White Hunter.
Q: How will all the lawyers determine who to sue after a nightclub fire?
A: It will continue to hum softly until the battery is spent.
Q: What the deal with this “Singing Fabrice Morvan” doll that’s forgotten all the words?
A: Damn, that’s obscure.
Q: I’ll bet that you weren’t aware of Tammy Faye Baker having performed Carmen in a Laotian prison, as part of a community work sentence.
A: Tender and tart, so long as the sauce is correct.
Q: What does urine baked pig anus taste like?
A: The Honorable Bertrand Russell’s Introduction to Mathematical Philosophy.
Q: What book makes the best substitute pillow, according to the Tired Student Institution?
A: I’ve got the power!
Q: What did Dwight D Eisenhower have tatooed on his chest following the bombings of Hiroshima and Nagasaki?
A: No matter how many times you ask, the answer stays the same.
Q: Charlize Theron, will you marry me?
A: Normally met with a heartfelt restraining order.
Q: What happens when you break into Ms. Theron’s house, dress up as a teddy bear and wait on her bed for her to get home.
A: Three clowns and a picknick basket.
Q: Whom did I mistake for the Democratic National Convention, soliciting door-to-door for campaign donations?
A: Now that we’ve rendered your badger bulletproof, I wouldn’t worry, Miss Tinkle.
Q: However will I keep my precious pet from being tormented when he gets loose?
A: Four digital watches, a gun, and a jar of greenish slime.
Q: what did the writer of GPF Comics use to create his characters?
A: Thursday afternoon.
Q: At what time do the Pirahna Brothers nail their enemies’ heads to coffee tables?
A: “When the moon hits your eye like a big pizza pie…”
Q: What love song to moray eels sing as part of their mating ritual? (it’s a moray)
A: We’ve gotten down to brass tacks, only to find they aren’t really brass.
Q: What was the unanimous decision of the President’s official 9/11 Terrorist Alert Homeland Security Defence panel on the investigation of the composition of brass tacks.
A: St. Thomas was missing a leg.
Q: Why was Judas Iscariot trying to hide a smirk at the last Supper?
A: Enormous numbers of tiny transparent fish.
Q: What are you trying to transport across state lines?
A: Maj. Gen. Gordon’s Jersey-Fried Tofu, now availible at 117 locations nationwide.