Question for you Dangerosa

[Charlie_Tan]

@Banquet_Bear

…you haven’t shown a pattern of comments. If it existed you could point to some examples. I simply don’t believe you. I’ve asked several other people to show me this pattern in this thread and they can’t show anything either. You started this pit thread. Don’t give me the excuse that you can’t show a fucking pattern because its too fucking hard. You started this pile-on. Take ownership of it.

Compiled for your evaluation. None of the posts have been snipped. Some are quite old, others are more recent.

@Dangerosa

This does depend on the kid. My daughter will bring up anything with me or her father. And she’ll answer questions. Open and honest communication all the time.

My son is not the great communicator and anything to do with sex and his parents makes him squicky - even though we’ve been open all along, these discussions are far outside his comfort zone.

@Dangerosa

We’ve had that discussion with both our kids - although with my son who is adopted we have no idea what his genetic tendencies might be. We do know that depression and alcoholism gallop through my family like Secretariat on Derby Day - so since they were little they got the “it is something to be careful of” speech. They are currently ten and eleven.

@Dangerosa

My asexual daughter (really, not my fantasy - its her identification - at least currently) is on birth control. Evens out moods, she doesn’t worry about a period anymore - and the crampy feelings that go with it, and clears up acne. Plus, if she would have sex - with someone with a penis - she’d be protected against pregnancy.

Pregnancy is a big concern for parents. As are STDS. As is sexual violence. As is having your heart broken at sixteen. The last happens if you are straight or not. Sex adds a layer of complications to teenage relationships - which are hormone heavy and drama prone to start with. I think most parents would like to delay their kids having any kind of sex for as long as possible - sensible parents recognize there is little they can do. Sensible parents realize that you still worry.

I’m more worried about my son. He doesn’t like to tell us what is going on in his life. I’ve met one girlfriend - I don’t know if he has had others. He could end up getting a girl pregnant and we might not find out about it for a long time. If he penis turned green, I’m not sure he’d tell me - much less tell me about something more subtle.

@Dangerosa

My son was adopted as an infant. He knows all about it. He’s Korean, its pretty darn obvious he isn’t our bio child. He never talks about it. Never really wants to talk about it. It just isn’t his thing. We talk about it around him from time to time (and his sister does - she’s fascinated by the whole story). So I think its possible he does sort of remember it enough to have pieced together parts, but its not a big enough deal to talk about it or he isn’t comfortable with it. And if that is the case, its probably important to talk about it with him, because kids tend to fill in the blanks by making shit up - and he might believe a lot of stuff that aren’t true.

@Dangerosa

Trust me, they don’t work with a normal fifteen year old all the time either. Don’t ask how I know, except my son is living with grandma to keep him away from his peer group. And he doesn’t have ODD. Short of locking him up, grounding him didn’t work because he would slip out when we took our eyes off him. With two adults working full time, our eyes weren’t always on him. So now, my retired father has a new hobby…

Link.

@Dangerosa

I’m getting myself and my fifteen year old daughter a set for Christmas.

She was a HUGE footie pajama girl and outgrew them a few years ago - as in they were difficult to find in adult sizes.

For Christmas for maybe the past ten years, her and I get matching jammies - we usually don’t have a lot of choice since finding something in size 10 kids and size 10 adults that match - unless you visit one of those matching jammies websites that seem…run by the Stepford Wives.

This year she wears adult sizes, and Target had footie jammies. So we get footie jammies - for the nostalgia. I’ll probably wear mine a few times when its cold, but really won’t wear them much. Pain in the butt to visit the bathroom. I’ll see how comfy they are. (Its possible it will become the Saturday hang around the house uniform if its warm and comfy enough, but I sort of doubt it).

@Dangerosa

Our cutoff is September first. My son’s birthday is August 28th, so we held him - on the theory that he was a little short for his age (still is), of pretty average intelligence (still is) and that a year wouldn’t hurt. I’d do it again (although he’s going into his Junior year and sometimes I think that he’d be graduating this year and I’d be done with him in high school!). He is one of the oldest kids in his class - redshirting being uncommon here.

My daughter’s birthday is September 20th, so she is one of the oldest in her class as well.

I have a friend who has a master’s in remedial English - so she’s dealt with kids trying to catch up her whole career. She says she’s never seen anyone regret “redshirting” - she’s seen a lot of kids who would have benefited from not being the youngest.

But me, I’d be cautious - even with the three days the fact that he is supposed to be a grade above carries a little stigma among the kids - like he wasn’t bright enough to start, or was held back. I wouldn’t do it if it were months.

Oh, and FFS, stop posting ellipses at the start of every post you make.