Buttering PT is damn waste of butter, just why? 
- Unfrosted brown sugar cinnamon.
- Toasted.
- Buttered.
- I nibble the edges off of 3 sides and hold the forth in my fingertips. Then I can eat several bites of just the buttered toasted brown sugar cinnamon goodness without the flavor being impacted by the crunchy and dry edges.
It’s a culinary masterpiece.
(The frosted version is an abomination until The Lord)
Rice crispies themselves are not grains of rice fluffed up somehow but are a rice flour material formed into things that look like rice grains. I was not really imagining rice crispy treat things with a fruit filling, which would just be too much sweet, but more like some sort of fruit tempura like product, subtly sweeter in crust than regular tempura but not ultra-gooey sweet.
And definitely not frosted glazed. I remember some store brand knock-off that replaced the “frosting” with chunks of turbinado, which was much better than that damn sheet of hard sugar.
Quoting myself for context
Girded my loins and went to Wal*Mart today. The Pop-Tarts section was impressively large. But looked like it had been attacked by collection of ADHD vandals. No stack of items was consistently all one flavor or facing the same way. Just a mess.
I almost walked out empty-handed then spied one of my prize upside down amidst a stack of unfrosted Strawberry flavors.
A quick pass through self-checkout and for $5 US I was the proud owner of 16 genuine unfrosted blueberry Pop-Tarts. Which is probably 15 too many.
Opening the box once at home they look smaller than I remember from Ye Olden Dayes, but I was smaller then too. They sure don’t fill a toaster slot, although IIRC they never really did.
It was entertaining to look at the nutrition panel and see that 1 envelope = two tarts was 25% of the daily allowance for carbs. For diabetic me, one half of one tart is about my usual carb limit per meal, and only if most of the carb isn’t sugar. Which in this case it is. So more like 1/4th of one tart is all I should eat at a sitting. Hah! The bodily sacrifices we make for Science!
The ingredient list was as scary as the nutrition disclosure. Summarizing a bit it’s flour, HFCS, sucrose and <2% each of 3 seasonings then dried blueberries, then other dried fruits then the usual chemicals.
Reading between those lines at most about 1% of a blueberry Pop-Tart is or ever was blueberries. I suppose I should be impressed they’re in there at all.
I’ll eat my sample here later; have to recover from my slightly-too carby lunch first.
TBH, the best “Pop-Tarts” I ever had were a gluten-free alternative, before GF became a fad, that had a graham cracker-like crust. Don’t think I’ve ever seen them since, but man, they were GOOD!
Feel ya, man.
I could eat a fourth of one. On a good day.
Just enough to piss a person off.
Didn’t Dave Barry warn that pop tarts in a toaster can catch fire?
I had a Pop-Tart catch fire in the toaster once (old, cheap toaster). IIRC I was able to blow it out.
I presume it was this one:
We’ve done the rough equivalent to the above, although we subbed out the filling for a much easier hack - we bought premade canned fruit pie filling, which made the net work a whole lot less. Just the pastry dough, fill, crimp and bake. And they were (of course) MUCH better than a PopTart. But even with the hack, it took a good bit of time for something that is junk food. So I think we’ve done it a total of 2 times.
If you start w prefab pie crust and canned pie filling, it’s essentially
Cut dough rectangles, spread one rectangle w goop, pile second rectangle on top, crimp, bake, eat.
So not real hard, but still vastly harder than “rip open Pop-Tart package and snarf”.
Although for safeties’ sake I’d sure toast my home-made tarts in a (toaster) oven lying flat, not vertically in a slot toaster. Just in case my crimping technique was bad or the thing slumped more than I expected and got jammed in there.
I’ve never tried it, then again I haven’t had a Pop Tart in years. Upthread somebody had lamented the loss of Dutch Apple flavour and those had been my favourites closely followed by Brown Sugar Cinnamon.
In order:
Brown Sugar Cinnamon
Blueberry
Cherry
(All frosted)
Lightly toasted, always break in half
Does anyone remember Danish Go-Rounds in the 70s? They were like a Pop-Tart only thicker and oval shaped. They were amazing!
Also, I like Toast’ems better than Pop Tarts. The Great Value version is really good too.
Damn. I guess that explains why my fasting blood sugar was 119 yesterday morning after having had 4 Pop-Tarts the day before. (2 strawberry frosted and 2 cinnamon and brown sugar.) But it was for SCIENCE!
Every diabetic is different, but for somebody who’s not shooting insulin (yet) IMO / IME …
What you ate 4 hours ago should have no impact on your current or subsequent blood sugar. Cheating just rots your feet, eyes, and other arteries, and hastens the complete death of your pancreas and kidneys. It doesn’t increase your fasting number later that day, much less tomorrow.
IANA medical anybody, just somebody with 10+ years dealing with DM2 and a lot of reading under my belt. And a lot of finger-sticking plus deliberate dietary management.
I was (half) joking. I’m not diabetic yet but I’m warming up in the bullpen. My Dad was. My older brother is. It’s really just a matter of time. A1C has hovered around 5.7 for a couple of years now.
This Fan-Favorite Pop-Tarts Flavor Is Back for a Limited Time
That is a perfectly acceptable A1C.
Agreed. But if it’s steadily climbing that isn’t going to reverse itself. Only @Nars_Glinley’s spoon can do that. It’s their call, but they’re probably gonna have to do it eventually, and sooner is easier.
Cinnamon Roll Pop-Tarts don’t sound very different than Brown Sugar and Cinnamon.
It’s unacceptable enough that my medical provider asked me if I wanted to go on metformin, (although she didn’t necessarily encourage it).