Sorta…I keep hearing that music and seeing the video from that mad TV ?skit “lowered expectations”…
While I find much of your post thought provoking, I find that indeed I would like to hear more about this uncle and his proctologic tendencies. Would you happen to have a link to this thread?
As you were.
Perhaps it would be quicker to list what does constitute an acceptable Pit topic in your mind?
(Aside from bitching to your fellow Pit denizens about how UR DOING IT WRONG, of course. That goes without saying. :rolleyes:)
No, that’s it. And, really, since this is THE archetypal pit thread about how the rest of us are wrong, we may as well shellac this thread, put it under glass and shut 'er down. We’ve reached the end, the last word has been said.
The irony is that ivn1188’s own perfect thread will have dispelled all lesser threads and shut down his ‘special place’.
Me make poopy in mine pantaloons.
To be fair, I have taken minor vacations from infecting and settled for merely breathing on the Dope from time to time.
P.S. Merely for the record, Ivy is fractaly a trollish asshole. Open any post outside of GQ and it’s the same exact dance. He’s awesome, smart, cool, hip, and a true rugged individualist. But the very experience of posting on the Dope is unpleasant to him, and everybody else is stupid and bad and he’s awesome, by the way.
He’s not here for the bear hunting, is the point.
Man, don’t let Munch hear you using ‘butthurt’. 
I’ve been around since the mailing list. Not all of us were enamored with the idea of pay to play. And yes, I’ve posted that little fact before.
Ok, then. :dubious:
This thread is great because it’s a veritable who’s who of posters whose line count pretty much matches their post count. A gallery of people too impressed with their own cleverness (which basically boils down to calling people stupid). Of course there are a few posters here who manage to stand out from the crowd as people of wit. But you know, deep down, it’s not you.
The thing is, I’m sure most of you jokers see this like a bad western. I am the black-hatted, unshaven ruffian terrorizing the innocent townsfolk who are live in fear of of my uncivilized banditry, the cliched villain of a thousand tales.
You envision yourself as the rugged individualist hero, moved to step forward when no one else can help, in the name of justice, as you stride slowly through a conveniently placed pall of smoke up the dusty main street of the dope, accompanied by the jingle of spurs.
No doubt I, the unruly gunslinger, look up to notice your approach and for the barest instant you catch a look of alarm that tells you I know this is the day that my reign of terror comes to an end. But we both know it has to be settled, and I spit and sneer as you stand there heroically, ready to draw down for truth, justice, and the American Way.
Of course, you are quicker than me, because you have good on your side and in your cinema of the mind, you have vanquished me, thus proving the righteousness of your cause.
But that’s not really the movie that’s playing, even though you really really wish it was. Instead, you’re more like the goon on Raiders of the Lost Ark, who steps out and starts swinging his sword around in a display calculated (by you) to instill fear and terror in your opponents.
And it is at that point that I, suffering from the dual burdens of boredom and worry about the status of my lower intestinal tract, simply pull out the gun and let off a round, thus demonstrating the futility of your little display. You’ve come to the proverbial battle of wits armed with a plastic spoon, useless in the face of someone that so outclasses you that it’s sort of sad to watch.
But to be honest, you aren’t really even like that thug in Raiders of the Lost Ark. He at least had some martial prowess, outdated and tragically misdirected as it was. No, the scene really only makes sense if we replace our intrepid Arab with the Star Wars kid. Because honestly, the real danger here is only that you will manage to impale yourself on that mic stand by accident and get made fun of on the internet. Of course, that second part already came true.
But hey, why take it from me? There are 6 moved threads on the front page of the Pit, and I’m not banned. I guess that means I win.
Nope.
I pretty much envision a random mob of dipshits in some weird foreign film. You and me included.
I can get behind that.
I disagree with you. You are allowed to call Glen Beck a fucking douchebag or a blithering cunt in MPSIMS or GD just as much as you are in the pit. The only thing you’re not allowed to do is directly insult other posters. If you’re actually intent on changing minds and winning hearts by pointing out the insanity of some political pundit, and you post it in the pit, you’re just venting and looking for people to agree or else you want a thread to devolve (mainly because of the losers I am posting about) into a bunch of boring one-liners.
If indeed GD or MPSIMS were as “intellectually pure” as GQ or even ATMB, then you might have a point. But the only difference, indeed the key difference, is that the BBQ Pit allows you to insult other posters. That’s what it’s for, that’s it’s stated purpose. It’s not GD with more profanity.
I quite enjoyed it too: from “while the advent,” when I drifted off into blissful slumber, fully through to “place to do that,” when I awoke refreshed, full of purpose, and with a bothersome (and anachronistic) morning erection.
I imagine you as some dude with disheveled hair and big glasses taped together at the bridge of the nose, pushing your glasses up with your skinny arms and coming here to compose a rant worth of being better than not doing anything.
Though I like how you projected your own fantasy of your role on this forum onto everyone else. I see what you did there. 
Really, you’re just another dude that is sitting at home bored and lonely who came here to express your irritation at how the world just isn’t cool enough to entertain you properly.
Believe me I can relate. Though I am actually better looking than I imagine you to be. ;p
Shut the fuck up. It’s just a goddamned message board, you douchebag.
Yeah, big words from the guy who was challenging people to fight in the Meijer’s parking lot. You can see why I take you so seriously. Good thing this isn’t a message board about your truck, or you might have to make threats.
Who’s that trip-trapping over MY BRIDGE!!!???
Spoiler Alert: It’s not you, either.
You’re insulting!
The new, friendly, fascist SDMB doesn’t like your type, and you should leave forever!
Only kidding;)
D-bag
A) Douche
B) Dough
3) Dairy
D) Deficit
5) Dumb
6) Distorted
7) Distended
Really? Then I suppose you must have had a different account then.