“… doh!”
“The perfect orgasm can only be achieved using …”
…a bin liner, an orange and a Trabbant"
" Herbie goes ape-shit…
“…whenever I borrow his razor to shave my dogs. He says it’s not the dog hair that bothers him, but the burning desire to hump random legs he has afterwards.”
“Warning: Do not use if the clear seal is broken or…”
“… any other invisible water mammals are damaged.”
“The study of ancient Latin is required by …”
“…any Benedictine monk if you hope on scoring with him after your date.”
“Wine is fine but…”
“I prefer crack-rock…”
“The crystaline, sparklingly exquisite pain derived from a swift kick to the jewels”
“…the thought of so many strangers feet in it can be off-putting.”
“Enrique considered his options after the young, attractive Algebra teacher told him to come to her classroom at the close of school. Was she coming on to him? His test scores had been good. That said, he approached the afternoon with…”
“soft candlelight and a fresh bottle of Courvoisier.”
“If you’re gonna die…”
“… please do so when Matron is on duty, there will be no dieing between the hours of 9:00 pm and 6:00 am.”
“Blood transfusion should not be carried out within 24 hours of …”
“…the sacrifice of the chicken. Proper blood is well-aged.”
“Torpedo off the starbord bow, sir. Diverging course. However, the kraken is still…”
“…showing signs of kracking further and may disintegrate shortly.”
“I first saw Magda in Berlin, and remember how the smoke wafted about her ebony tresses as she made her way towards me across the crowded room. After a dance that was more than a sharing of the band’s beat, she looked at me and asked…”
“Is there any chance you could f*ck off, loser?”
“we were more than friends… more than lovers. We were…”
“…ISO-9000 compliance auditors.”
“Oh yeah? Scan this, ya…”
“… filthy landlubber” Sunspace said, turning into a Pirate.
“Pieces of Eight” Squarked Bippy, his fine green plumage ruffled.
“A,ha there Jim Lad” Beast replied. We really shouldn’t have taken those pills Eve found on the floor.
“Counting sheep, is a good way to …”
“lose you mind… the endless monotony… day in, day out in an endless reason-defying mind boggling parade of insanity… two million, five hundred seventy-two thousand nine hundred and fifty-apeshit!”
“what we’ll need to do is…”
“disconnect the cromulator before applying the jumper cables this time. The car can’t explode twice.
< kaBOOM >
…can it?”
“All times are GMT - 5h hours. Except on Venus. And Jupiter. And I don’t even want to talk about Alpha Centauri…”
“But then the Alpha Cetaurites ain’t all that keen on punctuality anyhow. And really what difference does it make of they’re late? Damn wet blankets, they are!”
“It was the Greatest!! We built a fire on the beach, toasted marshmallows, told ghost stories and did the…”
“…tango, naked, all along the coastline.”
“We were kissing with our eyes closed so tight, so young and feeling so…”
“…absolutely frustrated that we forgot the condoms, therefore kissing was all we could do.”
“Hickory dickory dock…”
…this bitch was sucking my…lollypop"
"my arm hurts so f*****g much, you would think that…