“…On second thought you don’t really HAVE to submit entirely… just don’t resist quite so much for a couple minutes, ok?”
“Walking through lush peaceful valley, Priscilla thought it quite miraculous that a mere 5 months ago…”
“… she was a 50¢ prostitute in a Laotian brothel. Still, she missed the four brothers left behind with her Grandma.”
“She looked good. She looked fine. She looked good, she looked fine…”
…dating twins was hard I tell you"
It was in the month of Liverpool, in the city of July. The rain was snowing heavily, the streets were very dry…"**
“…and Paul McCartney was, as usual, walking barefoot across Abbey Road.”
“Close my eyes and count to ten…”
....and when I open them my wallet better be back where I left it, and the hole in the ozone layer fixed, oooh and a muffin placed in my hand. Or you are all getting sacked"
“so eh wis oot on the pish the ither day and this wee shite half-inched ma peh supper win ah wis playin the puggy…”**
“eh… eh bidder swaller… <gulp> …there. Now I can talk.”
“Work? Work is…”
“… so eh giz 'im a Glasgee kiss, a boddles the suvern poofder.”
“Diamonds are a girls best friend, but …”
“…vibrating butt plugs will keep an all-day smile on her face.”
“Woodman, spare that tree! Touch not a single bough! In youth it sheltered me, and I’ll…”
“…be the one to cut it down.”
“My kitten is so cute! Every day it comes up to me and looks at me out of its big blue eyes and…”
“…plots my demise.”
“What goes up…”
“… is a girl’s best friend”
“Out damned spot …”
“…out! You know you’re not allowed in the den! Bad dog!”
“Organic. Non-organic. Feh. At this point I’m glad when my food…”
“doesn’t quack”
“I really love going to the dentist. It’s the only time I really get to …”
“…just lay back and have something long and hard shoved in my mouth…”
“When the world stops spinning, when the sun stops shining, that’s when I’ll…”
“…have expired from proton decay.”
“This is disgusting! This keyboard is full of crap! The keys are…”
“made out of spam”
“But, I thought I…”
“… was invisible, when I was standing naked in the girl’s dorm. So how can you claim that I was exposing myself indecently, Officer?”
“The best naturist holliday I ever went on, was a tour of …”
(Krys I WOULD kill you… if that weren’t so darn funny!)
[q]“The best naturist holliday I ever went on, was a tour of …”[/q]
“…A fast food restaurant. It DID have it’s drawbacks, however. Splattering fryer oil can be rather unpleasant for a naturist.”
“One day I was walking the Streets of Laredo, on the Streets of Laredo I…”
“…suddenly realised that the Mummer’s Parade is held in Philadelphia! Damn that discount travel agent and his hijinx!”
“My appreciation for Grandma’s stew was lost when I discovered the secret ingredient was really…”
“…discount People Chow.”
“I’m on holiday! Long weekend!..”