“… you, me, Jen, Paul, in fact everybody but Anthea.”
“Going down the sliding board, I slowed, then stopped completely, halfway …”
“…out of my mind! The sliding board support group had advised against such behavior.”
“If it keeps rainin’ like this…”
“…someone might get wet!”
“The Cisco DL-9000 router is…”
…yours to keep as a free gift whether you decide to buy the wig or not, all we suggest is that you try Wigstatic for a few days and if it doesn’t make you look like you have something on your head we will give you a blender.
“I’m actually a fart-chaser by profession. It’s kinda like what Bill Paxton did in the film Twister except you really don’t have the need for an ATV…”**
“…but you do need to do a lot of training with old socks beforehand.”
“Many of the juiciest examples were…”
“… whisked away into a waiting limousine, where you wouldn’t be able to have them anymore.”
“If it wasn’t for the fact that tinfoil is electrically conductive…”
“…I’d never have gotten to see my sister’s shorts. Mom was really weird with her clothes making ways and…”
“As the herd of wolverines approached the underground bunker filled with Cheerios™…”
“…pip-pips, ta-tas, old beans and mates, because the wolverines were enjoying the last of their summer hols from Oxford.”
“Bowls were stacked higher than you could see over…”
“…their stacking, unless you were better stacked than they.”
“The final instructions to the train crew immediately before the engineer jumped was…”
......." For the last time people, we don't have any parachutes on the train nor do we need them, and Bill put the spade away, you can't tunnel out of here you bloody nana."
"I may have lost my faith, I woke up yesterday morning and try as I might I just could no longer…**
“…conjure up a vision of Holy Mother Kournikova. I may have to go back to Radio Shack.”
“It’s cold. And dark. And my heart is frozen with desperation and loneliness. When, oh when, will…”
“…the pizza get here? Damnit, I’m starving!”
“Who would’ve guessed that baking soda and cheese could…”
“… come to life and produce offspring? The horror!”
“The next time you want a revelation …”
Ask your mother.
Tomorrow and tomorrow and tomorrow…
“…remains the delivery date promised by Fast Joey’s Appliance Sales, Massage Parlor, and Gaming Enterprise.”
“Give the hamsters more amphetamine! If we want them to generate enough power to…”
“…energize the 1920’s Style Death Ray.”
“Corn fritters are good, but…”
“… what’s this funny aftertaste?”
“Sure, Army of Darkness may be a cult classic, but how do you account for…”
“…the flyovers at every midnight screening.”
“It isn’t raining rain, you know, …”
“…it’s raining artificial rain. The kind with synthetic di-hydrogen oxide.”
“If she’d only told him her birth name was Wilbur…”
“…she would have understood all the references to wings, bicycles, and popcorn in the bathroom.”
“Mike! What are you doing? That thing will never fit in…”