Read me quick, by morning I will have disappeared! (mod rant)(long)

The BBQ Pit
121

Not at all. I never had a problem with being talked about there or elsewhere- beats the alternative- and I couldn’t care less anyone’s negative opinions of me or my writings. It was only when my dying mother was brought into the mix that I flipped.

I know what my problems at the time were: stress, undiagnosed diabetes, and decompensating medication among others- but what the fuck was their problem? Who is pathetic enough life to wish slow painful death on a stranger because they don’t like her son’s writing on a fucking message board? Or to encourage the disruption of a funeral service? That’s not snark, it’s being a total asshole, and the site and its administrators (one of whom has the bad taste to quote Buddhist literature as a tagline in a sick joke) allow it, encourage it- I wish him no harm myself, but I will say that if CarnalK or Excalibre or those responsible for the actual comments were to be devoured by maggots I don’t think he’d be missed, I’m sure he won’t be missed. I am very honest when I say that I pity a person who is that lacking of the compassion that others have, and when I think of the future before them I can hold no fury.

122

Oh sugar, there’s no way they could have travelled that far. Surely some semidigested Hostess Snacks would have deflected some of them.

123

You know what sticks out most to me about your post? There are a whole lot more Dopers- respectable ones, even (not me, clearly)- posting there than you’d like to think.

Because I think it’s silly to post anonymously and am therefore identifiable, I regularly get emails and PMs from Dopers asking for a code for an account there or asking me about something that was said. I can’t count on both hands (hardy har har, make the easy joke, I’m sure) how many “big name” Dopers have asked me things along those lines.

And I know you’re going to say to put my money were my mouth is, but I’m not such a horrible bitch that I’d ever do that and give out names. You don’t have to believe me, by any means, but do you honestly think it’s just me and 100 folks that were banned over there?

124

And almost instantly reappeared.

You caught me. I spent my mother’s wake and funeral doing nothing but logging onto a snarkpit. (My actions are actually unusually accounted for that day; I assure you, most wasn’t spent online.)

125

My, my, my, Sampiro, that was mighty snarky of you. I do wonder where a delicate flower such as yourself would pick up an insult such as that. I guess we’ll just never know! :slight_smile:

126

Surely someone who can take so much time and energy to concoct such long, wild stories about his family can think of a more creative insult than some tired fat joke that’s been told better at other boards.

127

Hell, I post over there! Doesn’t negate the fact that the place is full of negative, juvenile assholes who can’t be trusted in any way whatsoever. :smiley:

128

Pot. Black.

d&r

129

Oh puh-leeeeeeeeeeze! “Over there” it would be “Hey, you know who has a fat fucking ass! Diosa! Heh heh you too… fat fucking ass… like in ass-fucking… but fat!” At least mine had a little panache and was a tad unexpected, you must give that.

Of course I could, and truth be told unless I’m 1) having sex with them or 2) concerned about the health consequences I couldn’t care less about somebody’s weight- been there/done fat as they say, but I didn’t see pithier comments or rational dialogue going anywhere and anything lengthier would result in a TLDR (as the thread where I was discussing my reaction to my mother’s cancer where a snarker interrupted to post TLDR, my first exposure to the other site that for reasons I’m sure make sense to someone somewhere must not be named- in other words, the whole damned thing started when a snarker shat on a thread here at the request of other snarkers, but that particular one had the decency to apologize).

But fat jokes- they’re easy and they get the point across and possibly a mild sting. Diosa by her own posting (I won’t look for it but it’s in a thread entitled something to the effect of “have you ever cried over someone else’s problems”) admits that she doesn’t have compassion for others. It’s not anonymous like most fat jokes she’s used to, but I tried to be personal of course. I can’t imagine her ever loving anybody enough to be troubled by cowardly anonymous calls for that person’s slow death amidst cheers and sanction, so… sympathies to any fat decent Dopers offended.

But in closing, here’s a story that might be a bit lengthy by snark standards, but you should read it anyway D.B., for it’s about you and how you gave me one of the best laughs I’ve ever had from the SDMB. Coming next… then my Jerry Springer final thought.

And—

130

I find it highly amusing that you yet continue to suggest that posts about your situation were allowed anywhere. The personal information (you know, that YOU SENT) was deleted every time it was posted. Sure, some person kept reposting (wasn’t it that incident that caused there to be IP logging, so that person could be banned? Oh, of course not, there are no standards anywhere but the lovely Dope), but it was deleted every time.

And for the millionth time, Sampiro (perhaps I ought to put this in a run-on sentence so you can fully understand): I do not condone or encourage anyone to say or do the things that were said and done to you that one time. I don’t take part in the “tranny hate” anywhere either- all of my posts here, there, and everywhere are under this screen name so anyone is welcome to check.

But please, do tell your story. Nothing would honor me more than being the subject of one of your 8 post long diatribes.

131

WHY DIOSA MAKE ME LAUGH, by little Jonny Sampiro, age 12 years and 350 months

I’ll make this uncharacteristically short.

So, I started this thread a while back pitting ETS, the owners of the GRE, which I’d just taken. I mentioned that the tutorial software arrived weeks after I took the test, which I thought was funny. I also asked if anybody wanted it.*

Now, that same week Diosa had made some comment about how she didn’t like my writings, thought they were long and boring, fair enough- no problema. And of course she’d also made the “I don’t care about the suffering of others” comment earlier, which came as no surprise considering where she likes to post openly (for which, I really do respect her- I mean that, Precious).

Guess who the first person to contact me asking for the CD Tutorial is? Go ahead… guess! No you’ll never guess… I’ll tell you- it was Diosa!

Now, why did I think this was so damned funny? I’ll tell you- it’s kind of layered:

LAYER 1:

1- A person who had made an unwarranted snipe about my writing on this thread… asks me for a personal favor.

2- A person who admits she doesn’t have much compassion… asks me for a favor.

3- A person who talks shit (whether about me or not I can’t honestly say) on a board where shit is talked about my dying mother, where an attempt is made to disrupt a funeral, a site that has caused me to have embarassing meltdown moments… asks me for a favor.

Okay, that’s LAYER 1. Really this one I didn’t think was funny, just sort of :rolleyes: and “Damn! No Cæsar who ever parted his hair funny ever had that kind of Gaul!”

But here’s the funny ha-ha part that occurred almost simultaneously with the above:

A person who did 1, 2, and 3 above… doesn’t just ask me for a favor.

She asks me for a favor… involving a piece of software. One that requires hitting a .exe. One that could so easily be traded for a fake and uploaded with a virus that she would willingly hit and see all of her documents die as the voice of Florida Evans screamed “DAMN! DAMN! DAMN!” as the last official multimedia function her computer would ever experience.

Maybe it was just me, but I thought that was pretty damned funny. That is clueless…

That’s not just clueless but “Hey! Pol Pot says we’ll all be forgiven if we just admit we were in Sihanook’s court so I’m gonna confess!” clueless. That’s Suzanne Somers “I’m sure they’ll let me come back for the THREE’S COMPANY follow-up series!” clueless. That’s “Well Jerry, I’ve been on dialysis ever since I sold my left kidney to get my ex-con boyfriend out of trouble with the methdealers and then I lost my right kidney when I smarted off about his kiddie porn and he kicked me in my side, but I love him! Why did you say this show’s about men who wanna be wom… HOLY FUCK THAT SUMBITCH IS WEARING MY PANTIES!” clueless.

And it’s why I can hold no anger. I just waited til someone else asked for it and then said honestly “Sorry, it’s gone”, but the point is, don’t talk shit about somebody’s mama or participate on a site where people do and then be trusting enough to ask for a potentially hazardous favor. And don’t do drugs.

And thanks for the laugh and the telling character piece, Diosa. You’re dismissed.
Final Thought- a showtune by ABBA dudes, Tim Rice, with lyric modifications by me:

*Let [them] spill
out [their] hate
til [they] know
[they’re] deserted…

There’s no point
wasting time
Preaching to
the perverted…*

Sampiro Seacrest Out.

*Speaking of, to the Doper I did send it to- it was returned to me due to an address error for which I apologize. If you’d still like it I’ll be glad to resend but I’ve lost your email addie.

132

FreakFreely, is that you?

133

I really have no dog in this fight. I think this is all rather humorous, but dude, that was lame.
I mean seriously, that’s the best response you could come up with?

134

Jesus Christ Sampiro! You bitch about the place, but continue to do everything possible to make this thread about yourself.

I normally like yah as a member, but decaf man. Decaf!

135

Now you can see why Sampiro is such a favorite target of snark.

136

The sad thing is that most Dopers will never read this thread and miss out on this subtle subtext that makes Sampiro’s family mocking stories truly interesting. But thanks for the 2 pager Sampiro. I knew my little admonition would set you right.

I would have done it a little different, but good on ya Diosa.

137

First of all, when did I ever “talk shit” about your momma, Sampiro? I’m serious. Here, there, in my personal diary at home, tell me. Yes, I did say I wasn’t a fan of your writing, but perhaps I didn’t realize this would stick with you as I’m not really the kind to take personal offense to what’s said (or even to really remember most folks I encounter on) internet message boards. I suppose I’m glad that my side comments about your writing have stuck with you this long- I had no idea I was so capable of making such an impact on a complete stranger.

But to be completely honest, this is what you decided to separate into it’s own precious post because it was so dramatic and scathing? I was expecting something a little more scandalous than this one time that I asked if an offer you made open to everyone was still available. You got me! I don’t hold personal grudges with folks on internet message boards so I tend to forget that there are others much more pathetic than I. My mistake, sugar.

I’ll go play by myself in my room now, since you were so kind to dismiss me after that painful lecture. I have no idea how I’ll heal from these wounds. * emo tear *

138

What is ‘TLDR’?

139

Internet short hand for “Too long, didn’t read.”

140

I think that’s the source of the animosity. Sampiro honestly doesn’t believe someone could possibly not like his writing if that person didn’t also want to be a mortal enemy.
“Get a grip” time, Sammy.