Sappy Songs You Turn (Punch) Off Instantly

“Sometimes When We Touch” by Dan Hill. I’m not suicidal, but hearing this song makes me want to reach for a gun just to put myself out of my misery.

Anything by Rick Astley (e.g. “Never Gonna Give You Up”).

Post-Cetera Chicago songs, Peter Cetera as a soloist songs.

You’re my hero. Most everyone around me when those two songs came out thought I was a heartless cretin when I didn’t just BAWL… Not only was I not moved to tears, I’ve come to hate each of these songs in a way words cannot describe. I’m usually Ms. Sensitive, and I cry at kid movies and such, but I don’t see how anyone can get past the fact that those two songs are just BAD.

Also,“Anything You Want,” which has gotten quite a lot of play from those Target commercials. And “Sex and Candy” by Marcy Playground. Shudder

OK, so that last one isn’t sappy, but I had to include it for good measure. Because I. Hate. That. Song.

Not sure why, but it makes me want to toss my radio out the 4th-floor window.

I’ve been to [del]Hell[/del]Paradise
Having my [del]demonspawn[/del]baby

“The Greatest Love of All” makes me want to set my radio on fire.
That goes double for most anything by Celine Dion.

‘I Will Survive’

And whoever suggested ‘Watching Scotty Grow’ has touched chords I hoped had gone. They should be banned. Retrospectively. :dubious:

Hamilton, Joe Frank, and Reynolds.

I love ABBA, but cannot listen to “I Do, I Do, I Do, I Do, I Do”

No hard feelings between you and me
If we [del]get naked[/del] can’t make it
But just wait and see.

It makes me want to jam pencils in my ears.

“Cherish is a word I use to descriiiiiiiiiiii-iiiiiibe…”

So come on, now, let’s try it,
I love you, can’t deny it
Cause it’s true
I do, I do, I do, I do, I do!

Heh–I like this song, I really do, I do, I do…oh, sorry!
But I really HATE that craptastic Greatest Love of All.
And MacArthur Park–where’s the puke smiley when you need it?

Anything by Celine Dione, Barry Manilowand Lionel Ritchie.

All By Myself - Eric Carmen
When I Need You - Leo Sayer
I’ll Be - Edwin McCain
You’re the Inspiration - Chicago

Fortunately, I usually only hear these songs at wedding receptions. Unfortunately, it’s a definite faux pas to jam my cocktail fork into my ear at a wedding reception.

I swear to God, if I ever get married (which I doubt), I am not going to hire the same craptastic wedding DJ everyone else has, and we won’t have any sorry-ass, sappy, cliched love ballads like that, nor will we have “Celebration,” “Electric Slide,” “Macarena,” “Chicken Dance,” or any other stupid dance songs or warbling glurge. And if the guests complain, fuck 'em. I’ve PLAYED (as a hired musician) at too many weddings to have any patience for that crap any more.

At my wedding. I had 2 instructions for the band. Absolutely no YMCA and no Barry Manilow.

I embarressed myself at the wedding when the evil jerks played YMCA anyway. I ran up to the mike and grabbed it and said very loudy “What is your porblem, I specifically said no YMCA” :mad:

I may have overreacted but I thought my requests were pretty simple.

Is that on “Buckwheat Sings”?

Not at all. I’ve played enough weddings and bar mitzvahs to know that taking requests from guests is encouraged, but the final say must always come from the party-throwers who are paying me. If the hosts want a Bee Gees medley, I’m going to be the biggest Bee Gees fan in the world while I learn all those songs for them. If they specifically say they don’t want “YMCA,” there’s no way in hell I’m playing “YMCA,” even if drunk Uncle Earl gets in my face and starts hollering at us to play it.

i love you.

and sorry for the re-edits, but i don’t know how to code for a strike-through either.

The Greatest Love of All is evil, but it is eclipsed by the travesty that is I Will Always Love You. I want to slap the drugs out of that bitch’s bloodstream when I hear it.
Also that Titanic song, and “She’s Like the Wind.”

This is coming from a person who loves most of the songs in this thread.

What? No one has mentioned that awful “I don’t wanna miss a thing” song by Aerosmith? It is quite possibly the suckiest song that ever sucked. It just plain sucks.

Achy…Breaky…Heart–Billy Ray Cyrus

Fishin’ In The Dark

Anything by that sap that started every song with "Every time I…"

There a dozen more that make me leap for the OFF button, but I can’t even bear to type them.