In the recent past, we’ve had several of our humble members announce their intent to mount a campaign for the office of the Presidency. This thread shall serve as an invitation to all of you to participate in the first round of the Presidential Debates sponsored by The Chicago Reader® and The Cecil Adams Ignorance Conservancy. We hope all of you candidates will graciously accept this invitation to air your positions and party platforms to the fine citizens of this great virtual nation.
We have, Spoofe Bo Diddly, of the “Straight Dope Party,” steeljaw of the “I Wanna Live in that Big Ass House Party,” Tripler from the “Damn Good Third Choice Party,” and of course, Ms. Shirley Ujest of the “What the Hell, My Hat’s in the Ring Too Party.”
I’m asking the above candidates to reply with their acceptance of the proposed debate to begin Monday, October 16, 2000 at Wassamatta U, Assboink, Idaho. On that morning, I (your moderator) will start a thread with the ground rules that we’ll agree on here, a short introduction of each candidate, and the first questions.
Also in this thread, I’m soliciting questions for the candidates from the Teeming Millions.
Thank you, in advance, to all the candidates for your participation as well as to the Teeming Millions for their upcoming insightful and absurd questions.
This is my suggested format to which the candidates may propose changes. I’ll post the agreed to rules at the start of the actual debate thread.
After I make the introductions and pose the first question to the candidates, they’ll each have one post to respond. All candidates will also be allowed two rebuttal posts they may use to challenge the other candidates’ responses to the posed question or further clarify their position. Use your rebuttal posts wisely. After all allowed responses are used or declined, I’ll pose the next question. And so on until all submitted questions have been asked or you’ve put all of us to sleep. At that time we’ll take a poll and determine the winner.
The Teeming Millions are encouraged to submit their questions for the candidates in this thread. The Teeming Millions are also encouraged to throw cutting comments and rotten fruit at the candidates during the actual debate. We’ll call this a test by fire. If this works, or at least seems fun, we can get the candidates to select a VP and try it again.
dpr, I have no objection to your declared candidacy or your participation in the actual debate. If the above candidates have no objections, you’ll be included in that debate.
Mr. Moderator, a question from the Environmental Lobby:
I want to know what the candidates plan to do about IP Logging.
The reckless logging of IP’s has been going on unchecked for months now, and we of DRIP (Democrats and Republicans for IP’s) feel that someone has to stand up to Big Business and tell them that the wholesale destruction of one of our vital resources is unacceptable.
Arnold Winkelried here, registered SDMB denizen, California, USA.
My question to the candidates:
What are the seven words that should be off limits to threads in every forum (except The BBQ Pit?) Are there seven words that should be off limits even in The BBQ Pit?
I HAVE BEEN SMOKE-FREE FOR:
Six months, one day, 15 hours, 28 minutes and 46 seconds.
7385 cigarettes not smoked, saving $923.22.
Extra life with Drain Bead: 3 weeks, 4 days, 15 hours, 25 minutes.
Mr. Moderator, columnist John Corrado of the Washington Times here with a question for yourself and a proposed question for the candidates.
For yourself, regarding the rules of the debate- Will double-posts be counted in any special way? That is, should a candidate double-post during their rebuttal, will that count as both of their rebuttal posts, or will they still be considered to have a rebuttal post left?
For the candidates- Many Dopers are upset and out-of-sorts by current flame-wars occuring on this board. At what point do you feel that intervention- be it military or otherwise- is necessary to stop such wars? As a follow-up, do you support the use of military force to stop those that send spam to this board?
Mr. Corrado, double-posts will count as only one rebuttal. Candidates will retain their rights to make a second rebuttal post. Triple posts and greater, however, shall result in immediate expulsion of the candidate, if a simple majority of the Teeming Millions so votes. Any other technical glitches shall be decided by majority vote of the Teeming Millions at time of occurence.
I also would like to inform the other candidates and the general public that we are in receipt of an acceptance notice from Mr. Tripler. Mr. Triple states that his time here may be limited during normal business hours and asks our indulgence that he is allowed to make the bulk of his responses and rebuttals in the evening. As moderator and in the interest of fairness to all working candidates, I grant that request to Mr. Tripler. He may make his posts at his convenience.
A question of semantics for the other candidates:
Are we going to limit the number of questions, or are we going until all but one drop from exhaustion?
Secondly, I think there was another candidate who was preferring later hours.
May the best candidate win.
Tripler
Vote Damn Good 3rd Choice Party!!
We’re just damn good.
Dirty bastard Monster104, with a question related to the topic of concrete…What are your proposed solutions to the consistant Mark Serlin sock puppets?