First off, let’s please keep religion out of this; it’s going to turn the whole thread into an argument about religion. And second, the potshot at the OP doesn’t belong in this forum. Thank you.
Nope, most likely he’s just banging the gringa of (what is percieved as) low moral standards. It’s a fairly common occurance with young, female, American ex-pats. They think they’re in a relationship and the guy’s just using them for sex. One would never introduce her to one’s family. To male friends, yes, family, never.
What skeeves me out is his refusal to introduce her to his family. Sounds like a case of good enough to fuck, not good enough to marry.
It also could very well be that in his culture, meeting the parents is a much larger (and more serious) step in a relationship than it is in America. Perhaps one doesn’t meet one’s partner’s parents until the relationship is well on its way to a marriage, rather than a casual dating situation.
Note: I am ignorant of the culture in question. Just offering this as a possibility.
Nope, I ODed on purpose. I like to hear the pretty colors.
I actually think that’s pretty common with a lot of guys in a lot places.
Yeah, in Latin America and lots of the world it’s pretty standard to live with one’s parents until marriage. That was about the only part of my post that wasn’t supposed to be sarcastic.
As I said to my niece when she was 17 and thought she knew everything;
“Your world is this big” (holds hands to size of basketball)
“and you know this much of it” (holds hands slightly smaller)
“So you think you know everything. But the world is…well, the size of this planet, and you only know this much (size) of it. Every day you’re going to learn more of it, sometimes the hard way, and someday it will dawn on you how little you really know.”
This is where your friend is at.
I wasn’t initially thinking along those lines, but you’re right. She could just as easily be a bit on the side.
Meh, a lot of people are good enough to fuck, but not good enough to marry.
Seems to me the OP and his lady friend are just annoyed by young women in general who like older men, particularly when claiming to do so because of maturity. If a 22 year old girl to me, “I like men 10 years older than I am because the boys my age are immature,” my response wouldn’t be, “Well you’re immature, too!” and explain to her just how immature and conformist her opinions are. I’d just say, “Okay.” Why would the girlfriend debate with Ann over whether or not she’s mature? Dude, whatever.
This was basically my reaction as well. Because they are ostensibly friends, it’s unclear why anyone would respond this way in a conversation. Unless you didn’t like the person who made that comment, and wanted them to know it, I’m unclear why the belittling comments were necessary.
You’re entirely right. I apologize.
Because some people value being right over being friends.
Well it wasn’t a debate at all. It was a conversation about why one would exclusively date much older men. Girlfriend proposed a theory about this topic. Ann proposed a theory of her own. I found Ann’s theory both annoying and amusing because her theory basically involved complimenting herself for traits she does not possess.
We didn’t tell Ann we thought she was immature. As I wrote in my OP, “Of course I didn’t say this because Ann and Becca are both nice people who are fun to hang out with, and what would I gain by insulting them. But goddamn if I didn’t want to. Oh well that’s what anonymous rants on the internet are for.”
I agree with what Olive wrote, about how maturity can take different forms, and can mean different things to different people. I don’t care if they want to date older dudes, and I really don’t care if they don’t live up to some nebulous standard of maturity. As I’ve previously stated, the thing that riled me a bit was the self delusional nature of their statements.
Eh, fair enough, I guess, but when I see this
I see the girlfriend going “Nuh uh! You’re not a non-conforming feminist that you think you are.”
I think you missed the part of the OP where I stated I didn’t call them on their bullshit reasoning because I didn’t want to insult them, hence the necessity of the internet rant. As to the initial comments that my girlfriend made, they were vague theories on the issue being discussed, not personal attacks. If you can’t take some general commentary on an issue you brought up, you must be pretty insecure. Personally I like having friends who I can have a debate with, or friends who give me honest feedback.
I should have refreshed the window before I posted. My girl was being a bit of a smartass, although the conversation didn’t quite go down exactly like. But hey, I like smartasses.
Burned!
pdts
Really? I didn’t mean “you” as in Meanoldlady. I meant it in lieu of one.
Burned!
ACM
Woowee, somebody’s getting defensive. Believe it or not, sparky, I have friends who I don’t agree with on everything! I just get the impression overall that your feelings get hurt when girls your age say they want to date older men, and you get all “Why? You’re not that great or mature!” I could be wrong, though. It happened once. In the 80s.