I don’t really know what a standard self pitting consists of, but I’m reasonably sure that they are treated as the lowest of the low, even in the parlance of the Pit. I’m not expecting or hoping for any sympathy here, it’s not called for. This is not about me, rather about what I’ve done.
I recently made a comment in a thread, this one. My first comment was just short of being a true asshole, some might say that I crossed that line and then some. Skip Magic was moderating in almost real-time. I feel that his choices in regards to notes and warnings were well chosen. That was A+ moderating AFAIC.
This post is not about Skip’s exemplary moderating, but about my behavior.
My first post was snarky and rude, at best. My attitude was not called for, wasn’t productive, and I was attacking little things that were not important. That was poor form.
The real reason that I’m here doing this, is my post #16 in that thread. I’ll not make excuses about why I said that, or what circumstances led to it. That was just a cruel and hateful thing to say. I’ve been on the receiving end of such a remark and it hurt really bad. I am completely ashamed that I said that, and it has been eating at me every waking hour since then. I am very sorry for having said that.
There’s a lump in my throat now, mostly from remembering the offhand comment that made me leave the Dope for several months. It disgusts me to think that I could ever be capable of inflicting that sort of hurt on someone else. I wanted to apologize in the thread itself, but I didn’t feel it was appropriate. Besides, this way people can use whatever language they want when addressing me. A couple “fuck you’s” headed my way won’t be a surprise, and I’m certainly not going to fault anyone that needs to vent about my behavior.
SandyHook I am very sorry about what I said. It was mean, unnecessary, and pointless. I hope that what I said didn’t affect you too much. I know that what I said affected me to a significant degree, that can’t be a bad thing.