Would you push the red button?
Does this Count as a Mass Killing?
** Why babies on the Senate floor?
On being detail-oriented and household chores**
No need to bother changing diapers, when you can get Mitch McConnell to do it.
**Ah, young love… or, people (perhaps stupidly) getting married young. **
I put hollandaise on my dog and then came on him
I apparently had a stroke
nm
Update [this is too easy, and I’ll stop here]
I put hollandaise on my dog and then came on him
Lies you tell your pets
** My experience in Maui (what was I seeing?)
Why babies on the Senate floor?**
“I saw babies on the Senate floor in Maui” is a lesser-known Dylan lyric.
** How Can You Buy Eskimo Clothes Online?
Explain to me how selling on eBay works**
There’s a joke in there somewhere about selling bikinis to Eskimos, but I’m not gonna tell it.
How dangerous are cows?
My last will and testament
** You’re going to fight a duel- what weapon do you choose?
Your Name
**
“Ready Muad’Dib?”
“When you are, Rumpelstilskin!”
Stupid Republican idea of the day
Vote GOP 2018!
This was rather unsporting.
You’re going to fight a duel- what weapon do you choose?
Would you push the red button?
**Lies you tell your pets
I apparently had a stroke **
“Lassie, I can’t move my entire left side! Run get help, Lassie! Run get help!..Ha ha ha! I was just messing with you girl! I’m fine! Here, have some bacon.”
Well, canned tuna apparently won’t make your guts explode
Lies you tell your pets
R.I.P. Fluffy. 
How does one deal with people in their lives who have eating disorders?
Memory of Corn chips and Potato chips of days long ago…
Well, you don’t offer them chips…
**anyone ever hear from “MeanOldLady” anymore?
Is it rude to ask your age?
**
**Lies you tell your pets
Folks, PLEASE do not let your doggies run free in dense urban **
I can’t let you out, boy, it’s too dangerous!
What silly thing is on your bucket list?
I have jury duty
What a life you must lead!
** You’re going to fight a duel- what weapon do you choose?
Poll: Use chemical weapons or not?**
I always wondered who’d win - Chemical Ali or Wild Bill Hickok.
Give up everything to know for certain what happens after death
Fruit fly invasion
As the gasping bald patient breathed his last, he saw an immense heavenly light shine in front of him, appearing ever closer until it engulfed his vision and bathed him in warmth. Then, the fruit flies came.