Another “Ridiculously Cute Things Kids Say” Thread
Farts and fetishes…
Awe, how adorable. 
What’s the worst job you ever had?
Why are you bringing up old shit?
Sheesh… just asking. No need to get your knickers in a knot!
**Farts and fetishes…
Things you think are awesome and other dopers should know about **
New posts:
**Happy Straylya Day Folks
Tell me about your unplanned pregnancy. **
Why is America so wealthy?
Roswell Rods
Buy 'em, sell 'em, trade 'em with your friends - it’s a whole underground economy!
**Castration seen as climate change aid to reindeer
Closeted Nut of the Week: Andrew Shirvell **
**How would you solve the obesity epidemic?
turning down sex
**
That’s what I currently do, and it’s not working…
my alien abduction experience
Tell me about your unplanned pregnancy.
I KNEW IT!!
**Whoa… shocking family secret revealed!
my alien abduction experience **
**Why can’t my hand go through my desk? (physics question)
Roswell Rods
**
Asked and answered.
**The Ongoing Online Dating Advice Thread
Would you like a custom-coloured pet? **
Most guys would prefer having a girlfriend instead of a chartreuse hamster. As for the rest, I don’t want to hear about it.
Tell me about your unplanned pregnancy.
my alien abduction experience
So–alien-human hybrid, huh?
what’s the oldest electronic item in your house that you still use?
The Total Perspective Vortex
Oh, this old thing? Shucks, I’ve had it since Zaphod Beeblebrox was President.
Do all cats have weird idiosyncracies?
My Cat Won’t Stop Peeing On My Stuff…Advice Desperately Needed
[del]Cat free to good home[/del] $25 to the first caller who’ll take this &(#%! cat.
No more color-coded terror alerts, as of April 27th
A good time will be had by all
Interpret that any way you’d like. 
**A good time will be had by all
Factoids that sound right, for a moment… **
** Take your shot at balancing the federal budget
No more color-coded terror alerts, as of April 27th**
Fabulous idea! With the new black and white alerts, we’ll save millions on printer costs alone.
True facts learned from soap operas
Taco Bell’s Ground Beef Is Less Than 35% Actual Meat
Which soap opera was that one from?
Lovers Destined to Be Together (Actors paired romantically in multiple roles)
Chumlee in Pawn Stars
Chumlee isn’t two people, he’s just really fat.
These aren’t sequential here – they’re sequential entries under Living and Eatocracy* at CNN.com. But I had to show them:
** Osteen on sex, prosperity and politics
It’s gooey and chocolaty **
*That section title is reason enough to post on the SDMB.
Factoids that sound right, for a moment…
I’m getting married!
That’s why you should always get married in Vegas - the marriage chapels now have divorce lawyers on staff.