**Ladies, what did you do for your hen night?
premature labor **
Fortunately it turns out the stripper is working his way through med school.
** I have spit stones. Ya know, like kidney stones only in my face.
Neat useful tricks that you think most people are not aware of
**
I’m not sure how it’s “useful”, but, Okay…
** I’m Going to be Having Cataract Surgery- What To Expect?
Cat Piss Surprise **
“Sorry Mr. Lundqvist, we ran out of eye wash.”
** I need to fire an object into the sun…
Earth in space and time
**
Cat Piss Surprise
Odd Public Restroom Habits You’ve Observed
Most people don’t take their cats into the washroom at all, let alone aim their streams over the cubicle walls…
“Cat Piss Surprise” really has legs -
Most out-of-place dishes you’ve seen on a restaurant menu
Cat Piss Surprise
What’s the surprise, that it has cat piss in it or that it doesn’t?
** What originally brought you to the SDMB?
I have a helicopter?
**
Yes. You could have used it to come to the SDMB, too.
** The Most Disgraceful Thing You’ve Ever Seen (Especially in Public)
Why do so many Americans dislike the French?**
You had to expect a wave of national revulsion after Jacques ordered red wine with fish.
** Helen Hunt’s face - wtf?
The Ninth Gate - Huh?**
“Bob’s Quickie Online Movie Reviews” - cryptic, but a fast read.
**Why do so many Americans dislike the French?
Why do Americans dislike France?
**
And while we’re at it – Why do Americans Dislike the French?
**Odd Public Restroom Habits You’ve Observed
Great pens **
Did you mean to type “Great penis”?
** What is the biggest silly mistake you ever made?
So I rolled my car today…**
**Why do so many Americans dislike the French?
Cat Piss Surprise
**
Baht eet eez wafer theen!
**I smashed my son’s bong
Guys, trust me when I tell you, this isn’t the right way to impress a date.
**
** Drilling one hole into a cement-brick wall…
Who am I working for anyway?**
If it’s Wendy’s, maybe you should head on back to the deep fryer.
**Six months ago I did not die…
Guys, trust me when I tell you, this isn’t the right way to impress a date.
**
Damn, I’ve been telling every woman I’ve met that I didn’t die six months ago and no date yet 
Melting old pennies
I need to fire an object into the sun…
Overcomplicating things, much?
They probably think the fact that you’re alive shows a lack of commitment.
** Why does the space shuttle make crackling noises during ascent?
While We’re Discussing Missillies - India and Russia!
Melting old pennies
I need to fire an object into the sun…
**
** Cat Piss Surprise
My Diabolical Plan Worked!**
They’ll never hog the dryers at the laundromat again.
** I smashed my son’s bong
Great Northwest Dopefest?**
Not anymore, you ruined it.