racer72 is that you? If so, I am truly sorry. I thought if I just twisted around backward I could, er, reach more “things”. FWIW I’m still traumatized too.
dp
From time to time, someone will come into the ER with a tear in the vaginal mucosa brought on by vigorous work with a penis or a dildo. Sometimes these are bad enough that the OB/GYN will need to come in and do a repair, this presents me with the opportunity to ask ‘hey doc, do you consider that blunt or penetrating trauma?’
The skin is usually flexible enough to handle a certain degree of erection. They don’t want you to get a full-on hardon. A stitch popping down there wouldn’t be fun.
I didn’t get that impression; as far as I could tell, she was dead serious. I’ll also note that the individual in question (or, as Scott Adams would say, induhvidual) didn’t come across as terribly bright.
The conversation between the doctor and the patient was pretty funny (and, considering how much pain I was in from the kidney stone, the fact that I could find it funny at that time was pretty impressive):
“How did this happen?”
“I wuz havin’ sex.”
“Was it dry sex?”
“I do not like the Cone of Shame.”
… accidentally?
Ever see the animated short film titled “Wrong Hole”?
Yep, I was coming in to post “Surprise butt sex.”
You might want to rethink using that abbreviation in a thread about sex injuries…
Accidentally?
That’s what you think.
A former co-worker of mine dislocated a hip during sex, but would never give us any details. What a spoilsport!
If you don’t stop exacerbating, you’ll go blind!
My wife and I were making out on the couch. I was seated as one would normally be, and she was sitting on my lap. At some point I shifted and she lost her balance and fell backwards. I tried to catch her but couldn’t. So, essentially, I powerbombed my wife.
I thought about that, but then I thought, what the hell.
Let me guess. It was a hot day, so you were doing your housework naked, and just as you were finishing up mopping the floor, you slipped on the wet tile and fell, it was a one in a million shot, ‘and that’s why I have a cucumber lodged in my rectum, doctor.’
Seems thats the way most of these things happen.
I made my wife go blind on our honeymoon. Wasn’t related to sex, but makes for a great story.
I’m going to carry that picture in my brain for a long time. 
In college, I had one of those old waterbeds that was really just a big bag with no baffles to prevent waves. I went to the ob/gyn for my annual checkup and she proceeded to touch a scar that had appeared at the bottom of my spine.
“Do you remember getting that injury?” she asked, smiling up at me. “No.” I replied.
She gave me a huge, unprofessional grin. “You’ve been bottoming out in the waterbed! Add more water.”