In my first year of college, my high school senior girlfriend at the time, came down for a weekend. That Saturday morning I misplaced a shot right into her eye. Her eye swelled up and watered for the rest of the weekend. It didn’t ruin our relationship, but she sure caught some crap from my roommates. I have had black pepper in my eye that didn’t well so much.
How do you refrain from having an erection?
But a freind of mine (yes really) did the same thing when his mate for the night ground himself on said friend’s penis.
Worst part was what was written on the ER report - injury from rough sex.
Oh wow - I couldn’t imagine trying to explain that to your roomies, parents or friends. How did you manage it without the snide “run into a door did you?” comments?
Sorry I know this is going to come out as a multi-post but…
If you read Bryce Courtney’s autobio on his son’s struggle with haemophilia, a circumscision almost killed him.
Snipped at a few weeks old, mum and dad went out for the evening and came home to a blood soaked daiper…
Not to me, but a guy I was dating back in the 80s, he had a waterbed and during a move the bladder got punctured so he replaced it with an inexpensive mattress until he could afford a new bladder.
Going at it, the mattress slid up under the headboard, so he ended up powerdriving his head into the headboard. Gave the guys at the ER the giggles, he ended up with some stitches and a concussion.
I killed a beanbag chair and made him a bolster to keep the mattress in place until he got his tax refund and the new bladder 5 months later =)
Please tell us you don’t seriously believe this tale.
mmm
To the lab!
Another danger of those beds is hitting the resonant frequency of the waves - The reflected waves can (and will) flip you right out of bed if you’re in the wrong spot in an awkard position. Upshot: Acute muscle strain to the biceps femoris.
So. . .the doc “knew” your gf?
I assume she meant ‘burns when it gets in your eyes like hot sauce would, were hot sauce to get in your eye’ and not ‘burns when it gets in your eye with the exilerating pain you get from hot sauce.’
Or maybe lacortadora is just that hardcore. 
I’ve got nothing as dramatic, but I did discover that even a very small tear labial skin bleeds a LOT. Lest I be accused of stealth bragging, it was torn from extended and vigorous handling, not by any particular physical gifts of min.
I’d assumed it was the natural course of monthly events, and continued on. I’d been delaying things for a considerable period of time at that point, and stopping would have been disappointing for both of us.
–
I spent most of the next hour apologizing, of course, to her annoyance. She hadn’t even noticed.
Well, from now on, trim your goddamn nails first.
D&R
Knuckles, actually. The parts of the hand that weren’t, ah, directly engaged had been hitting the same spot repeatedly, for about 20 minutes or so. And that area had been the recipient of considerable attention before that. Small impacts can add up.
I’ve learned my lesson. Switch hands and vary the angle more.
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I’d say it hasn’t been a problem since, but there have been few enough occasions since then to provide any meaningful data.
A few years ago, I was having sex with my girlfriend at the time and it was her on top. She could get fairly into it and rough at times and she really started bucking and thrashing when she got close to coming and it bent my penis at a crazy angle inside of her. In addition to the extreme pain that came along with it, I also peed blood for the next few days. It was alarming. But thankfully, it passed and I returned to normal. But now I am slightly paranoid being on the bottom. I can’t help it. 
I’ve had hot sauce in my eye (taco bell packet, smashed under someone’s fist, some time in elementary school. Squirted into my eye) and I’d say that yeah, about the same.
Well, I was in my thirties at the time, so there weren’t any roomies to worry about and I didn’t live within a thousand miles of either parent. Friends I just told the truth to and they laughed with me. Thankfully nobody asked (hopefully nobody noticed? I was pretty good with the makeup) when we had dinner at his grandmother’s house.
This guy I went with once was big into S&M… He was scratching me and whipping me and I was getting into it, so I went with it. Well, some of the cuts on the back of my thigh got a little infected and I had a hard time sitting through class for a while…
But those are nothing like racer72’s story.
not really an injury but here goes:
at the time, I am using a diaphragm for birth control. I get it in the right place and we start up what we intend to do…
while we are totally involved, we hear a muffled snap
my gentleman gets a funny look and says “I think I’m stuck…”
we disentangle me, man, and diaphragm carefully (!) and finish in such a way as won’t impregnate 
I get a cervical cap within the week: that’s still my fave method
Oh, jeez. I’m posting first, then going back and reading the thread. I love these topics!
When I was in college I had a one-night stand with a guy I met through WoW. We’d been friends for several months before we found out we didn’t live far from each other. He drove a couple of hours to meet up with me. We were both college students, and it was summer so I didn’t have any roommates. He was a virgin, had never even kissed a girl! Very enthusiastic guy, though.
I didn’t plan on having sex, per se. I wasn’t sure what he’d be ready for and I didn’t want to push him (campsite rule!). But yeah, we ended up in bed. He had been fingering me like a pro for a few minutes–I distinctly recall asking him if he was sure this was really his first time? I guess all the gaming (and/or desperate masturbation habits) really strengthened his grip. So we were both really into it, things were getting heavy… but his fingernails were long and he sliced my inner right labia! :eek: I ran to the bathroom and determined it wasn’t terrible. It bled quite a bit since I was excited and blood was rushing to that area, but nothing that required medical intervention.
The aftermath was awkward of course, but not friendship-ending. I was more worried that he’d be scarred for life by his first sexual experience, so I did what I could to make it positive for him. Popped a couple ibuprofen, stopped the bleeding, and he spent the night. Nothing was going to go near my vag after that, obviously, but we still had fun.
And goddamn, if it doesn’t hurt to piss near an open wound.
There is a story that goes around my new rescue squad about a couple that made a sex toy out of a Sawzall. The amorous rednecks used the blade as the mount for a dildo. While using the contraption, the blade cut through the soft rubber and into her.
Glad I wasn’t there to take that call…
Spoilered for TMI/Oversharing
[spoiler]You know how sometimes when you pee, because of how your labia is sitting, some of the pee dribbles backwards onto your butt? Imagine that with anal fissures. Oooooh so not fun.
For those that don’t know what they are, http:// Anal fissure - Wikipedia (link broken due to there being a photo of an asshole on the page)[/spoiler]