Got a 3 year old foster sister. Take her shopping with me sometimes to get her out of Mom’s hair. Went to the store with her today to get a birthday cake for the surprise party I’m throwing my friend tomorrow. A bunch of people assumed she was my daughter. OK, I’m 17, I guess I’m physically capable of having a 3 year old daughter. Anyway, I look older than my age and most people today were very nice about it and didn’t say anything but stuff about how cute my “daughter” is and how good a girl she is for helping her “mommy” do the shopping. I can handle that.
But all too often, usually when I’m at Wal*mart for some reason, old women will give me lectures about today’s declining morals and teenage pregnancy and shit. First of all, you’re jumping to conclusions here! SHe’s NOT my daughter! How do you know she is? I’m not allowed to have a little sister? Asswipe!
Secondly, what difference does it make to YOU if I have a daughter? Who gave YOU the fucking right to make value calls on me??? How do you know how old I am? What in fucking hell do you know about my circumstances? How do you know I’m not older than I look and happily married? Or even just older than I look? Or even just married? WHAT THE HELL?
Third, why the hell do you feel the need or the right to walk up to a total stranger in a store and bitch her out?!?!?!?!
Scylla – yeah, I’m ok with the honest mistake people, I just let that slide most of the time because quite frankly it doesn’t matter. It’s the people who get all up in my face about it that really piss me off. Thanks for the retorts. I’ll try to remember them.
But isn’t the look of horror and embarrassment on thier face some kind of payback?
My father and I are close. We have lunch or dinner together at least twice a month. More than one waiter has assumed that I’m his DATE. My DAD. Talk about heebie jeebies. The morst annoying thing is that I look EXACTLY like him.
Great googly moogly, Swimming, your dad has breasts too?
Racing, I would start asking them questions about why they assumed you were some [Dr Laura]“whore who just shacked up with a guy” [/Dr. Laura]
Look, a lot of people are going to jump to the same conclusion that this woman did. A lot. I probably would have. It’s not their fucking business. It’s not mine either. But if they’ve got the balls to confront you on it, confront them back. Make them understand just how wrong they were.
Hopefully, the end result is that they leave there a little bit wiser and you’re the last person they harrass with that holier than thou attitude.
Good god a’mighty, this is your opportunity to fuck with their heads! All you gotta do is start into it…“Oh, you know, I just wish I knew who her father was…there were so MANY of them, and they just kept coming and coming, if you’ll pardon that nasty pun…of course, six of them all think she’s their daughter, so at least we get plenty of support money…I don’t have to do any more hooking any more to keep us in Pampers and Burrito Supremes…say, don’t I know your husband?”
My mother and I had this happen at a restaurant while dining with my new baby neice. (My sister was at home resting). I was feeding the baby (she was a few weeks old, I was a very young looking 17) and this table of old people sitting near us started playing “Guess the mommy”.
First they say “It can be the girl- she’s way too young” which got a “Heeeeeey!” from me.
THEN they say “It can’t be hers- she’s too OLD” about my mom. Wow. You wanna see “all up in your face”? My mom tore them ALL a new ass about minding their own Goddamned business and she CERTAINLY was not “too old” to have a baby…(she was)
Quite a scene, but I wondered the same thing- why don’t people just mind their own business?
I hate trying to figure out stuff like this. Sometimes you wind up having a conversation with someone and you don’t know how to refer to the person they are with. With a little kid, it’s not too bad. “Is that your daughter? Oh, your niece, she’s very cute”. But as far as dates go, it could be very embarrassing if you refer to someones date as their daughter, or their daughter as their date.
I’ve had many people assume that my kids are my step kids, because our skin colours don’t match. It doesn’t bother me, since it’s a natural mistake, but at least I haven’t had anyone in Wal-Mart lecture me over it.
If I were you, I probably would have gone ballistic.
Now see, if I were a waiter and I was confused over daughter/date, I would just say “and who is this lovely lady?” Or “And what would this lovely lady want to eat?”
lolagranola, one of my friends had a similar experience. She’s white, her husband is Japanese and their daughter takes after him more than her. When she and her daughter were flying together to the US a flight attendant said to her, “what a darling little girl! Where did you get her?”
Her response: “Oh, I just grabbed her at the shopping mall. Why? Has there been anything in the papers?”
I hearby nominate this thread for the most posts that actually made me laugh out loud in such a short time frame. ricepad- classic!
Sublight- I like your friend already!
Scylla- nice group of put downs.
Oh, and Swiddles? DOES your dad have breasts? Hehe!
Well, OK. Not exactly. Actually, that could be a whole other pit thread. I get “Wow! You look SO much like your Dad!” all the time. I usually respond “Yea, except for the male pattern baldness, right?” or “Not really. I have two X chromosomes.”
I actually had the same thing happen to me with my cousin a little while ago. But I think the people in question were absolute morons… I realize I look a little bit older than I am, but I’m 18 and Zoe is 10. We’re about the same height, even.
It was just creepy. I wonder if those people wake up every morning chanting “Must push the limits of stupidity…must push the limits of stupidity…”
Swiddles: I know how you feel. Random people have actually stopped me in the street and asked me if I was my father’s daughter…we look that much alike. Except I have hair and girl bits, among other things. Yeesh…
If I didn’t live in such a small town, I’d say what you just did if I was with my nephews or baby cousins.
It’s pretty sad when you go to your own church and a couple people raise their eyebrows when I push a stroller by with my baby cousin and my guy friend walking beside me. People were jokingly asking me if I had been hiding something for a while there. Luckily I love the people at my church enough to let that pass since the majority of them are kidding.
The biggest problem I have is with my dad. Since he is almost 60 years old and I’m a mere 18, there’s a large gap between us; he’s old enough to be my grandfather, obviously. I don’t think that gives people the right to call him my grandpa however. I just politely correct people.
One time some lady mistook my brother for my boyfriend. He’s 16 so we’re about the same age. Still…ewwwww… I don’t see why this old lady made that mistake, since we just happened to be standing beside each other and walking around at the get-together…
Oh gross! If someone said that about me and my my brother, I’d drop kick them in the ass. After I finished projectile vomitting all over them, that is…
After I finished projectile vomitting all over them, that is…