Yeah, I already put 3, but after escaping the desert island I ended up on another one.
Burns: What do you think, Smithers?
Smithers: I think women and sea-men don’t mix.
Burns: We know what you think!
Bart: “Can’t sleep, clown’ll eat me.”
Sideshow Bob: "You want the truth? You can’t handle the truth. No truth-handler, you. Bah! I deride your truth-handling abilities.
Hope it’s ok that I can only think of one right now…
“Marge, will you join me for brunch?”
“What’s that?”
“It’s not quite breakfast, not quite lunch, but it comes with a slice of canteloupe at the end.”
Homer: I’m all alone. I’m an insignificant spec on a lonely planet orbited by a cold, indifferent sun.
FAT TONY: I don’t get mad…I get stabby.
MR. BURNS: Smithers, there’s a rocket in my pocket.
SMITHERS: You don’t have to tell me, sir.
MARGE: I’m here to express my moral outrage…and this time it’s not about that giant inflatable Dos Equis bottle…
Hey Mullinator, which episode was the “Can’t sleep. Clown’ll eat me” line in???
I haven’t seen that one in a while.
Lenny & Carl, that would be in Lisa’s First Word.
Apu (on the roof of the Kwik-E-Mart [sup]®[/sup] with a rifle):Thank you for coming, I’ll see you in Hell!
Homer: Okay brain, I don’t like you, you don’t like me. Help me pass this test so I can get back to killing you with beer.
Cafeteria Woman: More horse testicles means more iron!
Stacy Lavelle (creator of Malibu Stacy): I was forced out in 1974. They said my way of thinking just wasn’t cost effective.
Lisa: [gasps] That’s awful.
(Homer deals Blackjack to James Bond and Blofeld)
Blofeld: 20. Your move, Mr. Bond.
Bond: I’ll take a hit, dealer. [Homer gives him a card] Joker! You were supposed to take those out of the deck.
Homer: Oh, sorry. Here’s another one.
Bond: What’s this card? “Rules for Draw and Stud Poker”?
Blofeld: What a pity, Mr. Bond. [Odd Job and Jaws grab Bond and drag him out]
Bond: But…but it’s Homer’s fault! I didn’t lose. I never lose! Well, at least tell me the details of your plot for world domination.
Blofeld: Ho ho ho, I’m not going to fall for that one again.
Homer: “He’s gone to the garage”
Moe: “Oh, garage is it? Garage? Well La-di-da Mr Frenchman!”
Homer: “Well what do you call it?”
Moe: “A car-hole”
Marge: “Kids can be so cruel”
Bart: “We can? Thanks Mom!”
Lisa: “Owww!”
Badly paraphrasing from the Radioactive Man episode:
Bart: “What are you doing with that horse?”
Film guy: “Well, cows don’t show up on film so we have to paint horses to look like 'em”
Bart: “What do you do if you want a cow?”
Film guy: “Aah, we just tape a bunch of cats together”
From Treehouse of Horror VIII
Bart: Hey, dad, can I use the transporter sometimes? Please, I swear I’ll be careful!
Homer: Sorry, but this is a highly sophisti-ma-cated doo-wacky. If you don’t use it responsibly, KA-BLAM-O! (Homer outstretches his arms to add emphasis. One of them goes into the matter transporter.)
Lisa: (in another room of the house) Ow, somebody just punched me in the face!
Homer: It was your mother!
And later: Bart! Did someone forget our little KA-BLAM-O! talk?
I use highly sophisti-macted doo-whackey all the time. 'Course, I work in IT, so we have a fair number of said doo-whackeys around.
I have to add this from the latest episode:
“Hot snow falls up?”
Homer: “Aside from the pickaxe, the rattlesnake, and the testicle thing, nothing happened!”
Bart: “Ow! Quit it. Ow! Quit it. Ow! Quit it. Ow!..”
From Homer’s time-traveling episode:
Homer: “I wish I wish I didn’t kill that fish.”
From “Shining” episode, when Homer is thwarted by a television set:
Homer: “Television! Teacher! Mother! seeecret loverrrrr…”
(badly paraphrased)
Homer: “Aw, Marge, you know every time I learn something new something old gets pushed out. Remember the time you bought me that home wine-making kit and I forgot how to drive?”
Marge: “Homer, you were drunk!”
Homer: “Aaand howww.”
Mr. Burns: “Simpson, I need your help. I want to be loved.”
Homer: “I see. Well, I’ll need some beer.”
(Paraphrased)
Cecil comes to pay bail for Bob and give him a job?
Bob: Are you sure you want to do this? You have heard about the murder trial?
Cecil: I’m afraid not. You see, I’ve been living in a small cave on the moon for the last six months.
Bob: [tired, flat] Touché, Cecil.
(After receiving something like 50 cents for selling grease)
Bart: But dad, that bacon cost 20 dollars!
Homer: Yes, but your mother paid for that.
Bart: But doesn’t she get her money from you?
Homer: and I get my money from grease, what’s the problem?
Homer(to Mr. Burns): Could you repeat the part of the stuff where you said all about the things? …the things?
Homer(answers the phone): Yello. You’ll have to speak up, I’m wearing a towel.
Homer’s Brain: Don’t say revenge! Don’t say revenge!
Homer: Revenge.
Homer’s Brain: That’s it, I’m outta here! <stomp stomp stomp slam>
Homer: Oh, yeah? What are you gonna do? Release the dogs? Or the bees? Or the dogs with bees in their mouths, and when they bark, they shoot bees at you?
Oh, and one more (another Homerism):
Homer: I am the piano genius from the movie “Shine”.
Other person (don’t remember who): What’s your name?
Homer: Umm…Shiney McShine.