Maybe someone can help me come up with a snappy response to this sign, which I have to pass every time I walk to the Krogers.
Right now, the best I can come up with is, “Five minutes with a paintball gun, that’s all I ask…”
“…and ye recieve not of his plagues… but get health insurance with AETNA so call 1-800-555-CARE”
Taco Bell is running a promotion now where you can win free $5 vouchers to Sunoco, I think.
How on earth did this get past their marketing dept.? Not ONE of them said–“Taco Bell gives you gas”?
Hey, you - get out of that beast before you get her plagues! Honestly, on Sunday, no less.
Is this kind of billboard common down there? I have never seen such an offensive billboard in my life!
No, I haven’t seen any other billboards quite like that one. All I know is that I’ll be in a world of hurt if god catches me worshipping him on the wrong day.
I don’t know if these signs are everywhere, but in Texas, there are signs all over the place that say “SLOW–children at play” and I always picture a bunch of mentally challenged children playing in the street.
There are also signs that say, “Drive Slowly–We (picture of a little red heart) Our Children.” I’ve always wanted to change the suit to either a club or a spade.
Not exactly a sign, but as a kid I once saw a graffito that said “Fck the world, I’m on a quaalude." So I replied with "Sht the world, I’m on Ex-lax.”
And a sign near my house read “Lot for sale,” with a number to call underneath. It was a sign with movable letters and one day someone took the L off “lot” and replaced it with a P.
I bet the guy who owned the lot had a bunch of fun fielding his calls that day.
Okay, my snappy comeback to that sign would be “If you love your children so much, tell them not to play in the streets.”
Those billboards are all over TN, at least. We saw a bunch of em driving from Atlanta to Knoxville and back. I really wanted to get a picture.
And one of mine…
“Slow children at play” sign.
“Little bastards should run faster”–My response.
Recently, a sign appeared in my building; “Lost Something? Contact Gary at Company Name blah blah blah.” A lot of bike racers frequent the building, so after the Individual Time Trial, I added a small note; “Jah, it is possible I HAVE lost something. E-mail me, janullrich@tourdefrance.com. Hurry!” Cruel? Maybe.
Before we started dating, Mudshark and I once actually altered a sign. It was at a little ice-cream shop/restuarant in town, and at the time its billboard read: “Meatball subs,” and then the price.
He pried off the M and the E, I pried off the A and the T, and we ran, leaving the shop to advertize their Ball Subs until the next week or so, when the owner noticed.
My favorite is:
Slow to 50 when children playing on highway.
Well, when you’re doing 50 obviously you’ll do a lot less damage to these children who are playing in such an obvious playground.
There’s a church sign here in Tulsa that says “Don’t let worries kill you. Let the church help”
No snappy comeback here, just “What the fuck? Bwahahahaha!!”
As a kid whenever I saw “To Let” signs on buildings, I always wanted to put an “I” between the two words.
You should worship him everyday.
Years agosomebody graffitti’d along the Hammersmith Flyover “For God so loved the world he gave his only Son”. Big neat four foot high letters. Must have taken ages. It was immeasurably improved when somebody added a letter “y” right at the very end.
Also the building that I work in in central London decided recently that it needed to introduce some semblance of security procedures. Hence all workers were issued with security passes. The exterior doors to the building have a large sign in big white letters on a red background that says “Passholders only”. One evening I’ll be there with my red marker surreptitiously colouring in three of the letters………
Drewbert, there are at least three billboards like that one but with only the text shown on the viewer’s left of the one you’ve shown (Sundays laws etc and the 800 number), on I-81 through Virginia and Tennessee.
We have a Baptist College nearby, I often wonder quite how much study is required to learn how to baptise people. Do they have practicle exams, and do you fail if you drown someone?
Then there was the Antique dealers that allways had a sign requesting Gold Scrap. Unfortunately part of the sign was often obstructed so that it read
old
crap
The best sign I’ve ever seen is in Huntsville, TX. “Prison Area: DO NOT PICK UP HITCHHIKERS.”
I always wonder about the security of that (formerly Death Row) prison.
Posted on a local racetrack
“No Trespassing without Permission”
Excuse me, sir, may I have permission to go on your land without your permission?:rolleyes:
Sign on same racetrack:
“No illegal contraband”
Can you please explain the concept of legal contraband?
